Overthinking and living in fear

Hi Deisdawn,
I'm sorry you are having such anxiety and fear. However, we all do to some extent. I'm 77 and worry about what if my husband dies before me? How will I cope? When I get to thinking like that I pray to God. He's in charge of everything anyway and can help you deal with the situation you are worried about. You don't have to pray formally. Just talk to him like he's your best friend and he is. After you say your prayer go do something you enjoy like eating your favorite food or reading a good book. Let God handle your problems and he will.
I'll say a prayer for you.
PML

@desidawn
Just because someone had serious side effects doesn’t mean you will. Maybe it wasn’t the medicine but their illness or a combination of the two. One of the seizure meds I took had over 300 potential side effects. Another could cause cancer, but even if I had gotten cancer it may not have been the medicine. What good has it done obsessing about something that will probably never happen. 23 years of your life worrying and living in fear, what good has it done. How many of the things you’ve worried about actually happened?
How someone can stop that kind of thinking, I don’t know.
Can you discontinue or change the medicine? Talking about your fears out with your physician or a close friend may help. Perhaps seeing a psychologist would be beneficial.
Would you mind sharing what medication your so concerned about?
Take care,
Jake

If you have dealt with this since you were 16, there is a reason for that.

The positive is that you can acknowledge it. Most people don’t acknowledge the fact that they are worrying and you think you’re worrying is keeping you safe. It’s not. ESPECIALLY about health.

If you have never spoken to someone in person like a therapist, i recommend starting there. They can help you to better understand why you worry and help you to see that it does not benefit you.

They will explain how a thought by itself can make you feel like you are experiencing it.

Have you ever smelled a really good scent that reminded you of something like a nice vacation and you automatically got the feeling that you were there?

That’s what a worried thought does to you- it puts you in that place.

in reply to @desidawn I totally understand, and I just picked up a great book on this topic, because I have anxiety and tend to "overthink" everything.

"The book is Calm Your Thoughts: Stop Overthinking, Stop Overstressing, and Start Living Again" by Nick Trenton.

It is a short read, 141 pages, and is VERY good and well written. I got my ecopy on Amazon and the reviews of this book were what convinced me to purchase the book. It is outstanding, non judgmental, and it also explains what happens to our brains when we are anxious. The author explains scientific approaches to completely change the way you think and control your thoughts. The author is a psychologist, and I believe he does know what he is talking about, as he too suffered from anxiety for most of his life, and he wrote this book in an effort to share his story to help others like us. I feel better already, just having read only a few chapters. Just being reminded that our ancestors used their "anxiety" as a means of survival was actually quite comforting to me. I hope you are able to find this book. Apparently it is part of a series, as there are other books he has written that accompany this one.

I also overthink, everything every movement every motion, every word spoken, every simple situation, overthink, fear of results of every action, and thought that crosses my mind.
This symptom is accompanied by huge anxiety, and or depression, depending on your meaning, that does not allow me to sleep in the morning if I want to. I sleep for 6 to 7 hours at night, but once I wake up in the morning, the worrying the fear, the over thinking is at its worst. What I do is get up as fast as I can, get out of that bed, try to stop those wheels from turning and take my coffee and medication’s, and by noon I’m thinking pretty clearly, only to worry about the upcoming evening And what’s going to happen on tomorrow’s morning. How bad will it be? Will I get through it. Anybody with these thoughts and patterns have any suggestion? Thank you.

in reply to @mayo4meplease Check out the book I recommended, If you are unable to get the book, I have done a few things that have been helpful and that help me stay mindful. Sometimes when I am walking, I look down at my feet and I just focus on my feet moving. This helps me stay in the moment, as opposed to getting distracted. Obviously, you will have to watch where you are going, but the whole point is to focus on walking and staying mindful. Sometimes I just start counting, like: "1, 2, 2, 3, 3, 4, 4, 5......." I am sure you get the idea.

Hi Frances007!
Thanks for the recommendation of this book! I read an excerpt on Amazon. It's very helpful and like you said, well written. I will be buying a copy of this book.
Thanks again!
PML

Try therapy/counseling, please.

I worried all my life. My counselor has taught me how to deal with it. I am doing much better. It took awhile. I didn't really believe her. But the results are really good.

I can't believe that I waited so long to get professional help. Please don't repeat my mistake. You can enjoy life. Get a pro. to show you the way 🙂

In the meantime, here are a few ideas:

The act of worrying does NOT fix the problem. It may make it worse.
So, breathe deeply to calm yourself. Then either 1) do something about the problem-- like making a plan with defined steps; or 2) recognize and accept that this particular problem is beyond your control; and, therefore, it is not worth the price you are paying by worrying about it.)

Annoyance, not anxiety. I used to get all worked up about paperwork. It filled me with dread, fear and anxiety. My counselor has helped me see that paperwork is an annoyance, not a cause for anxiety. And I procrastinated and made it worse. Now, I can tackle the paperwork with less anxiety. It's an annoyance. Get it done soon. Give yourself a reward for doing something scary. A lot of things are just an annoyance. It's how you look at them. Attitude is everything.

Health issues: once you have done what you can do, you have to accept what happens. You sound like a conscientious person. Once you have appeased your conscience, accept what comes.

Hope this is helpful. Sorry if it sounds bossy in places. It took me awhile to learn and accept these ideas. My counselor led me through a lot of steps before I reached the "bossy" sentences. 🙂
Best to you!

I'm 64 and have dealt with OCD and abuse and depression all my life. I over think mostly because I have no support net work. The stigma has left me alone. Basically homebound. If I just had someone to spark a differant thought and get me back on course. Obsessions are awful in a lonely world. You are young. I'll order the book too. Maria.

I have these issues too. I wasn’t so much of a worrier until I developed chronic health issues related to Covid. This last year and a half has been very hard for me because no one understands the virus, or knows what it will do. Now I live in fear. I read someplace that just because you think something, does not make it true. Sometimes reminding myself of that helps. Deep breathing, and postponing worries has helped me too. At night I will deep breathe, and tell myself to let a thought go, because right NOW there’s not a thing I can do. I’ll think of it tomorrow. Sometimes that helps.
I also cannot sleep in the morning because the worry and fear starts as soon as I awake.
I hate it.