Where do you go when you're no longer add value?

I beg to differ, Kell. You bring value to this group just by being here and sharing. I hope you can see by all the responses how many people care about your well being. I am sending you my best healing and compassionate vibes. Keep an open heart and let yourself receive all the love coming your way.

Thanks for your concern; I wish I lived closer; however, I live in Wisconsin. I have been in Minnesota many times, my grandparents lived in St. Paul on White Lake.

Maybe I will give you a call, but I am constantly depressed, no fun to talk to, I cry a lot, I am pretty hopeless.

bear

Hi Kell,

My God! You poor thing. I know money only goes so far, but I hope there was a successful lawsuit on your behalf.

I've always been an introvert and enjoy being alone, but can sympathize with your loneliness. This may sound trite but I see several comments about pets and, if you can manage it, they can be a life changer. I would recommend a cat because they are lower maintenance than dogs who need to be walked daily, which sounds like it could be a challenge for you. We have cats that we've grown to love like children and are pretty much our whole world.

@kell4042
This is so awful. I’m so sorry. Is there any recourse you can take? I just can’t imagine what you’ve been through, but you fought to survive. And it had to have been hard to learn how to walk and gain your strength back.

Hello there!
In your short para, you start by saying "I have NEVER given value in my life, I am a loser, nonproductive, overweight 72-year-old women."
Too many times we have muddled thoughts that lead us to believe in who wee are because of certain premises, or reasons to support YOUR conclusions and characterizations -- loser, non-productive etc.

I suppose you must have come across this term, CBT in these posts. If you haven't, I urge you to look up starting with Mayo site. It stands for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy that helps most of us who have mental health problems. In simple words it means how to use our Thinking Process Correctly, with a change in behavior that will foster change to align with your corrected thoughts.

To start off, you'll want to first define what is Value? Do babies and children and even teens have value? After all they are Not productive (one way to measure value) yet. Only then you will know Whether you are adding or not adding value, assuming WHAT YOU mean by value. There are lots of artists who pursue their 'thing' after doing their day job to meet basic needs, but Do they add value or they are happy doing what THEY want out of their lives. I suppose you're realizing, labels like 'loser' and 'non-productive' will begin to fade or will disappear with a more clear Value label, if any, once you do this exercise. BTW being overweight means you belong to the three quarter of the adults in USA and therefore obviously by itself it's not such a terrible thing.

I'll suggest a book, Critical thinking for the Dummies. It's actually a great book to help one get along the path of Clearer Thinking. Let me know how you progressing.

BTW your last sentence is equally problematic -- it seems you know the answer, so the real question u wud be asking yourself is: Why am I not looking for people who LIKE what I LIKE to do?

Thank you for your reply. It appears that you may have a background in social work or psychology. My education is in social work, and I am familiar with CBT and critical thinking. However, I have been unable to apply these
strategies to myself. I criticize myself for not knowing better.

Every mistake and mishap in my life has been my fault because I am not a good person

You are a child of GOD, he CARES, and so do I..there is a support group forming for DEPRESSION and AGING no matter how old you are. JOIN US and we can talk. THAT HELPS SOMETIMES....I would like you as a friend. MargaretOB

I'm glad you have the requisite information/education to get to the next step. YOU are already at least half the way on your way. And now the other half -- and believe me when I say, the More interesting part of your journey BY YOU. And it is also the part that will give you a solid and one with Self-Pride (at least a glimmer of it!) that You Did It On Your Own. It will also help you see why the prosperous world is mired in Mental Health problems of Drug Abuse and Overdose Deaths

So Ask: What if the problem is NOT what you say, "I criticize myself for not knowing better''? What if it's Not a problem of just 'knowing' in the usual sense but a problem that is deeper-but-more-satisfying, like going after what YOU like to do with this life of yours?

Thanks Margaret for being humble-and-honest. Most of our attempts in life 'help sometimes.' Actually there was an article in the Wall street Journal I read yesterday how a group of dedicated Christians in Boston are able to help drug addicts Even As the city seems to find it too dangerous to send their health staff. Yes the thing WE need in the prosperous world is what we deeply hunger for: Friends.

And Aristotle reminded us of that long ago.
We may never have enough therapists but we can all TRY to become 'friends'. I've tried to engage with them on streets but they often seem either hesitant -- they are too preoccupied with more urgent needs -- or unable to carry a coherent dialogue. But Try we Must. What else the choice?