LBD & Distraction from destructive behavior

Good morning, @mrjohnwebb I'm Scott and I'm sorry to read of your predicament.

While I understand every patient, their disease, and caregiving are different, in several situations with my wife I had to make certain items disappear, apparently having been "stolen", or displaced. It was often the only way I could effectively stop certain destructive behaviors. I often found once the repetitive action was interrupted for a couple days, its importance disappeared. I had a high closet shelf stuffed with crazy stuff as a result, but for us it worked.

Just an idea of what worked for us.

Strength, Courage, & Peace

My husband is around stage 6 with LBD, and he can hardly talk, he needs assistance with dressing and bathing, cannot follow a simple direction (bring me a fork), he doesn't know my name or any of our children's or grandchildren's names, cannot recognize our house, or read, write, or use a phone, but he can do the yard work to perfection! He can crank and fill up the lawn mower, charge/change the battery for the weeder and edger and start and use them, pull weeds, use the blower, etc.. However, I can tell this will come to an end soon - especially since it is so hot here and he wants to do this in the middle of the day (we live in Alabama) and he is going many days longer than he used to in doing yard work. I did get rid of the hedge trimmer and the chain saw - for obvious reasons, and we just have some hand trimmers - but they are hidden, and we do this together. I can't find our axe yet, but it will be gone, too. My husband has never been an angry person, and that is still the case. We have talked about someone doing the yard work, but since this is one of the few things he can still do and he enjoys, I am waiting a bit longer.
I do wonder if your husband's doctor would tell him this is dangerous or not safe....especially with a possibility of anger while holding a yard tool as an issue. There also might be some medication that could calm him down. I would probably go ahead and alert the neighbors - if they intervene he might respond better to them than he does to you. It is hard to distract one with LBD from something they can still do and enjoy. Wish I had better suggestions.....this journey is quite unpredictable and full of challenges that have no answers. Wishing some peaceful moments for you today and for a positive outcome for this problem.
Jan

Thank you Jan. I know part of my anxiety is fear of what’s to come. Both my mom and my husband have dementia and we all live together. It's overwhelming at times. Mom was hallucinating last night and my husband was outside with his saw and clippers until 9pm. I love them both so much, and I know it is right for us to be together, but sometimes I could do a better job of reducing my stress. Your response reminded my to be grateful that we can all still mostly communicate and they both still know the family. That’s a blessing.

Thank you!

Hello from a former caregiver. One suggestion is to help with weeding/clearing brush with your local park district or forest preserves like we have here since he likes to be outdoors. The problem is that you would have to go with him and I know that would be difficult with caring for your mother who also has dementia.

If you don't already have help coming in I would strongly suggest you do that because you will surely burn out from caring for both of them. You need to be able to get away once in awhile for lunch with a friend, a walk, whatever you enjoy in order to take care of yourself so you can take care of them.

Blessings to you and your family. Ruth Ann

If your mom can be left alone or if someone can come and stay with her for an hour, my mom would drive my dad to the local state park and my dad would pick up trash with one of those reacher devices, while my mom held out the trash bag. He had what the MD called “senile dementia”. He loved being outdoors and felt useful- that they were contributing to the “greater good”.
He was one of the Greatest Generation and that was important to him.

Love that idea! He would enjoy that a lot.
Thank you!!

Thank you Ruth Ann! John would love that and we do have some caregiver support so I can go with him and we can enjoy doing it together!
Thank you!!

I hope it helps and gives you something you can enjoy together.

Ruth Ann