No more Driving

One of my kids was hit by a car and almost died, has some permanent disabilities, so this was an emotional issue for me.

That’s horrible. I can understand that for sure. Thank God they are here. How much of this we have to take. No cure no nothing.

So sorry you & he are facing this milestone. My partner & I are going through it too. For us, the memory care specialist referred us to an OT who administered the Cognitive Skills Performance Test. She also referred us to a MN driver evaluation service for their assessment. The rationale was that “objective “ data from an outsider & that person’s conversation with my partner would be better than my conveying the bad news. Something for you to consider?
In our case, following all the above steps resulted in Ron’s memory specialist telling him No More Driving. He yelled at the doctor & was very angry but he did stop driving & a couple weeks later mellowed out about it. I hope you get a similar or better outcome.
No easy answers or quick fixes, are there?
Will your neurologist order more advanced dementia testing for your husband, such as specialized MRI, PET scan or lumbar puncture? If no, can you find a specialist who could help you get a more definitive diagnosis? That might help as well...?

Thanks for your message. He had MRI when first diagnosed about 2 years ago which showed some plaque. He also had 2 hour evaluation which cost way too much money and insurance not covered I asked neurologist if he should get another MRI and she said not now. I will ask her this week when I talk to her.
What is a lumbar puncture? Never heard of this?

FWIW, reminded my wife that the neurologist's assessment was that she shouldn't be driving for her own and any innocent party's safety. Based on that, I told her that the family would feel more assured if she took take the required State tests and pass them. Explained that there would be a vision test, a written exam, and driving skills test with an instructor in the car with her. Also that we would get her the appropriate driver manual containing all the current rules of the road that she would need to study and learn. I futher clarified that we would be responsible to pay the $200 fee to schedule the assessment... no matter what the result of the tests would be.

She hasn't asked us about the assessment in over three weeks. Frankly, we all know there's no way she would pass a written test, or that any instructor would ever sign off that she's safe to be on the road, and assume the huge liability risks she would pose.

Just a little different approach here.

/LarryG

I like your approach Thanks and good luck.

I concur with covidstinks2023 in working through your Dr. I talked to my moms cardiologist regarding our concerns with her driving. Dr was fully aware of her health issues and promised to take care of it. She had great respect for him. At her next appointment he brought the subject up and she was truthful that she was still driving. He asked her not to drive, it wasn’t safe and told her if she was going to continue to drive to let him know so he wouldn’t. That’s all it took.

Thanks for sharing. Fingers crossed or I’ll let his daughter be the bad guy.

In my state doctors are legally required to report a medical condition to the motor vehicle department if they think it is unsafe for a patient to drive. This report can begin the process of the DMV revoking the patient's license.

When I was with my husband at a neurology appointment his neurologist informed my husband that since he has received the diagnosis of Alzheimer's he could be sued for everything he has if he were to get into an accident. We could lose our home and everything that we have. In fact this had happened to someone the doctor knew. (I have been very determined not to allow my husband to drive. I love my husband and I feel sorry for him, but he just should not drive.)

The neurologist told my husband that he should give me the keys to the car. This really upset my husband but he did it. With my husband's illness he can appear very lucid at one moment and then at another moment he can think that I am someone else. If he decided to drive during one of his hallucinations it could be very serious.

A Lumber Puncture is a sample taken from the spine It is used to determine diagnosis. My husband had done. He was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia with positive Bio markers for Alzheimers. It is a fairly new test. It helped us in knowing what my husband is dealing with.