Downsizing, To Move or Not to Move? That is the Question

I agree but I’m not very well and get frightened though I have support. I have decided just to spend the money for safety but it’s hard

@alison0 It really is such a difficult decision. Our hearts want to stay where we are but our heads tell us there are so many reasons to downsize. If you have a large home the upkeep must get expensive, even just heating it must cost a lot, I know it does for us. We have been in our home for 35 years so part of our problem is the accumulation of "things". Our kids are married and live in different states but much of their "stuff" is still here.

If we ever do manage to get rid of stuff and move the one difficult thing will be we will probably move to a smaller home in a development with an HOA (Homeowner's Association to take care of some general upkeep outside). Most of those homes are two bedrooms and although our kids are not often here at the same time they generally are twice a year for a short time each time. That will be much more difficult in a two bedroom home.

I understand how you feel. Not having to deal with stairs will be helpful though and you need to put yourself first.
JK

Here a funny suggestion that happened to our family. 4 kids 3 in same state we grew up in. That's Minnesota and 1 in Nebraska so every time we told our parents we were comming over they had a gift box for us and when we left we were given that box. Fortunately or unfortunately that box contained our stuff, clothes, sports stuff, trinkets, school art projects ect 1 box at a time they cleaned out a lot of stuff. It happened slowly enough so the mental effects were not so overbearing for my parents to handle.

Funny Dave - as we are clearing out hiding spots in our house & sheds, we are doing exactly the same with our kids. With one small addition - as we have our own things we are disposing of, we offer to them first as well. Finally, we have (nearly) nothing of theirs in our place - 21 years after the youngest moved out.

Right now, there is a FULL table of kids' books waiting to be sorted and claimed by our daughters & grandkids. The grands will leave their favorites here to read with Grandpa, the rest will be claimed or donated.
Sue

I agree that staying in your own home is preferable to retirement homes or communities for those who still have a social network and don’t need company or assistance. However if I remain in my own home but suddenly need the services provided by a retirement home, I might end up wherever space is available even though it is not my preferred option. Worth thinking about. So I am all for planning where I might want to go and where I can afford to go.

Here a funny suggestion that happened to our family. 4 kids 3 in same state we grew up in. That's Minnesota and 1 in Nebraska so every time we told our parents we were comming over they had a gift box for us and when we left we were given that box. Fortunately or unfortunately that box contained our stuff, clothes, sports stuff, trinkets, school art projects ect 1 box at a time they cleaned out a lot of stuff. It happened slowly enough so the mental effects were not so overbearing for my parents to handle.

@davej That's a great idea for when my daughter visits but my son has to fly to get here so that would be impractical. I've thought of just boxing everything up and shipping it to him. It would be costly but then it would be done. I'm sure he doesn't want everything though.
JK

@contentandwell you say your son lives far enough away so he needs to fly home. I'm just thinking how fun it would be to make a roadtrip and go visit him and then oh by the way I've got a few things of yours would you mind helping me get them out of the car? Your son would need a sense of humor for that, and you get a vacation and see your family. Good luck dave

@rosemarya Sometimes downsizing means a lot more than physically moving. What I have trouble with, is where do all the family heirlooms go? I have oil paintings from Norway that my husbands family brought over in the 1800s and a trousseau box from 1737 (also from Norway.) The younger generation doesn’t want them, so, what to do? I’m really open to suggestion!