Lonely and Just want to talk with virtual friends here

Hi Carol,
I moved your message to this existing discussion called:
– Lonely and Just want to talk with virtual friends here https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/very-lonely/

I think you've landed in the right spot to join a supportive circle of virtual friends, including @thisismarilynb @jjwest and so many more.

Having dealt with a recent loss, you may also be interested in the discussions in the Loss & Grief group here: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/loss-grief/

Have you got a fun or funny story to tell us about your cats? How are they bringing a smile to your face at a time smiles are in short supply?

Lonely and feel afraid to talk. I have two sons. One is supportive and the other is not. I have always had a problem getting along with people. I attributed it to social awkwardness. Then came the really awful terrible year. After 59 years, my husband died. There is a lot of anger. He was not dying. He should not have died. He refused to use a walker to get to the bathroom at night. He said he could do it himself. So of course he fell and broke his femur. Three months later he was gone. I could barely take that in. Then I had to have a complete hip replacement. I was on the surgery list while he was alive, but when I actually had the surgery I was alone. I had to go to a skilled nursing facility after surgery because there was no one to look after me. Those places are worse than hell. Finally I was able to come home - to an empty house. I found a wonderful caregiver, but she could only give me four hours a day. But we did it. I am still going through physical therapy but except for housework I am doing everything for myself. I was finally able to find someone to come in once a month. Also did I mention that in just a few weeks I will be 88 years old? The future looks bleak. I have four more weeks of physical therapy. I have some extensive dental work to be done. And I have to wrap my head around the fact that my younger son really doesn't want to have anything to do with me. Apparently the whole world knew that he had issues with his mother, except for one person - me. I didn't know. How dumb does that make me? He has been extremely disrespectful in his few dealings with me and I now finally see that we will not ever deal well again. How long will I be able to take care of myself. Who knows? I do not want to move into those facilities where they take care of you. They are small and I will not be able to have any of my things with me. So for now I am just crawling into myself. I go to the store when I need food. I go to the library when I run out of books to read and that's about it. I do not want to interact with anyone at this time and maybe never. Probably the worst thing is that at my age you don't know how much time is left. I am reasonably healthy. Getting over a hip replacement is not an illness. I have a few months left and it will be a year. I see the surgeon in January. That's about how long it takes to heal properly. So my plan, such as it is, is just to go along as best I can and keep my head down. I am afraid to go anywhere because I am so not good at meeting people. I know there are groups that you go with to go travelling. My husband and I did a lot of cruising and I miss that so. If I feel better I might investigate this, but I am afraid. Thanks for letting me let off some steam.

I hope I am in the right chat room. I am a 79 yr woman with some disability. I love people, talking, doing things toge,ther. I have recently had to move in with my son and family. I ,cannot drive safely anymore. so I am here alone most of the time. Getting new Dr's, tests and hope Dr's can figure why my brain is doing weird things. My kids always tell me I am weird 🙂
I just need someone to talk with.
PEACE & LOVE....JJ

Thanks Sue!
I think it would be best if people who want to join send me a personal message so i could set this up for a Teams or Zoom video meeting, then meet and talk and see what we can do to create more video meetings like this. It would be fun! And maybe helpful, that would be wonderful.

Yes, it is very sad. I noticed it quite quickly after waking up a few times thinking 'hey, I didn't dream'. They never came back. Since they were important to me and all the creative things I used to do I really have mourned them for a long time.
I don't know if there is something I can do to get them back, and to get my creativity back. I miss being cut off that well, it was precious.
Maybe someone here knows?

Thanks for the watercolor method. I’ve been drawing since retirement and discovered an innate talent but lack training and had to cancel a class due to covid. This will be fun to try.

The beauty of this is that you can draw with pen & ink over the watercolor. I do not tape my paper for this method - it curls less, believe it or not. I have also had good luck pressing flat afterward with a warm dry iron.
May be a watercolor afternoon for me - got my tasks done this morning.
Let me know if you like it!
Sue

Can this method be found on YouTube?

You know WHAT?
This could actually be part of our little video-get-togethers! We could show one another what we've done since the previous meeting, or set a creative goal for instance. Share tips. Be happy and proud!
To all: please send me a PM if you want to be part of this online meeting group so I can start to set it up 😊

I don't know - I just took a few 5X6 watercolor samples and either drew or lettered over the dried pages.

Here is what I was taught:
IT'S PLAYTIME! Let the paint tell you what it wants to be.
Lots of water, lots of paint.
Splatter, spatter, tap, sprinkle, dribble.
Use one color, or several that will blend nicely. (eg red & blue or green & yellow, or blue & yellow.)
Spritz on some water. Use a very fine spray of water.
Move the paper, this way & that, to let the paint run.
If you get too much paint, going where you don't want it, use the edge of cheap, single-ply TP to sop up the excess.
Paint in details with your brushes.

So I hope someone gives it a try.