Due to 'life' I never had the opportunity to make friends. I hardly ever went out, am single, and feel desperately lonely. I can take care of myself and always have but have learned my caring skills weren't particularly good. They kept me alive but I have not lived.
No holidays, trips, bar, no beach or forest, nothing. And no friends to go out with or to simply have a chat.
I still work and I think my clients would be perplexed. They know me as a sunny and mischievous teacher who pulls their legs so they learn more, and trick them into doing things wrong to help understand it all even better. Little do they know. I am very alone and lonely. Being alone is not that big of a biggie: I know how to do that. But the loneliness is hollowing me out.
I wondered about making friends. I never had friends, I feel very awkward about friendship. I miss the person I am with clients in my daily life. I really would like someone to chat with. It would be so nice to even fall in love. To feel I am being loved. I never had that. It's so strange to realise so many are loved; is it normal to be loved, to find someone who loves you? Or is it the golden shine of being lucky and blessed enough to find this?
It would do me a lot of good to find people to chat with. Video for instance would be nice to get to know people. To chat, have a virtual cup of tea, or a real one of course! And to not be too ashamed of myself to hide behind the smiles and fun but to open up and maybe one day even be accepted.