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Bipolar Questions
Hello all,
I'm writing as the ex-partner of someone with bipolar disorder, and I'm working to try and learn more about it.
Long story short, my ex ended our relationship out of the blue after she had a medical scare (that perhaps was a trigger for this mood shift). She did this even though her closest friends and family members told her she was making a mistake. The medical scare ended up not being as serious as the doctors thought, and so she is now feeling a lot of relief. I can only imagine she was immensely stressed and scared during the month of time when the outcome was unknown. (Note - she is medicated, in therapy, eats well, exercises to manage moods.)
My first question is, do the behaviors below seem like a bipolar episode?
- seemingly impulsive decision to end our relationship
- pushed away close friends and family members
- was suddenly cold & distant towards me - tone shifted, body language shifted.
- days before the doctor appointment, she told me she was so in love, was telling her friends how happy she was, was excited for our future, etc.
- When I talked to her, it's like her body was present, but her mind was gone - she just stared off into space, wouldn't make eye contact, barely responded.
- had trouble sleeping after the appointment, was extremely tired.
- didn't talk to any friends/family about the breakup after it happened.
- Acted like she was FINE when spending time with friends - to the point where they are somewhat concerned.
My second question is, if someone is experiencing a (hypo)manic/depressed/or mixed features episode, once the stressor is removed, does the person come out of the episode quickly? Or is it a slow recovery back to a baseline? What is your experience?
Thank you in advance for your help & patience with my questions.
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Marjou, I took Miralax for about a month but it didn't help. I already eat lots of fruits and vegetables every day. Thanks for your suggestion.
Baseline - if her normal was with you I guess you are asking will she want to go back out with you once she comes to her self fully most likely yes! Will she this depends on her level of humility when stress is at bay
My doctors tell me I have bipolar disorder, though I have not had a manic episode in ten years. The only manic episode I had was likely brought on by excessive amounts of antidepressants. Whatever the cause it was life-changing.
I told my wife of twenty years I wanted a divorce; I loved her very much. I began an affair; I'd been faithful for twenty years. I started drinking alcohol; I'd been sober for thirty-two years and I destroyed a billion-dollar company we had built together. Ultimately, I had a psychotic break and committed a crime that landed me in prison for two and a half years.
Mania, left unchecked can be very destructive. People were used to me being in charge and didn't question my actions until it was too late. Even my psychiatrist did nothing until I was in the emergency room.
If the people who loved me had questioned my behavior before I was out of control I might still be married to the woman I love, together raising our children.
If you love someone and their behavior is contra to the person they have been, asking questions is loving. How they answer them and the choices they make are ultimately up to them and the providers.
I was a very high-functioning person. My manic behavior initially just looked like an extension of my usual thought process.
All we can ever do is lead with love.
I wish you and your loved one peace and good health.
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1 Reactionis drowsiness a common issue with medications?? how long can it last ??
Those behaviors are reminiscent of my loved one when not properly treated. I hope your loved one finds appropriate treatment and finds the tools needed to cope. I imagine the amount of stress differs with every individual.
Please keep in mind that recovery from a mental break is a process and takes time.
Your questions to learn about the illness are strong indicators of love and support. Be sure to also care for yourself. It is a long and winding road.
Our 30 yr old son is in full blown mania right now for about a month. He was doing a little better and got out of the hospital last week, but has been regressing again over the last week, so I think we are taking him back to another hospital. His meds are not working at all and he is ranting and raving 24/7 without sleep. It’s exhausting. To answer your question the moods can change suddenly or take a long time, like with my son, to get back to ‘normal’. I’m not sure there is a normal with Bipolar 1. He has tried so many medications, and only a couple have ever worked but they turn him into a drugged out, tired zombie due to the terrible side effects.
@johnfeldman
Consider yourself lucky. My son has to take 600 - 800 mg of Seroquel a night to help with his severe sleep problems. He has to constantly deal with constipation. He recently had an appointment with a GI specialist, and his situation with the constipation has improved. He is handling it well with miralax, and a generic form of Metamucil.
He has been unable to take lithium since Jan. of 2022, because he was showing signs of kidney damage. He took lithium for 27 years, and it was an effective medication for him. He has been taking the high doses of Seroquel, since he can no longer take lithium. In addition, he takes Vraylar and proplanolol, and he sometimes has to add Klonopin to get to sleep and stay asleep.
@dfb
I'm so sorry you had to learn from a very difficult experience that many patients with bipolar disorder cannot take anti-depressants, because they cause a switch into mania. My son had been intermittently treated for depression starting when he was 11, and he was taking an anti-depressant when he first became hypomanic, at the age of 14. That is when he was diagnosed with bipolar 1 disorder. Since then, his treating psychiatrists have known that anti-depressants cannot be used in treating his bipolar disorder.
You are absolutely right that friends and loved ones should be alert and aware when the behavior and mood of a person change abruptly, and the person begins behaving in ways that differ sharply from that person's usual behavior. It is important for those who interact with a person who has a bipolar diagnosis to notice unusual behavior, and to urge that person to get in touch with his/her psychiatrist and/or therapist, and get some professional advice and intervention. If the behavior changes abruptly, and the person does not yet have a diagnosis, it is important for friends and family to encourage the person to seek professional help. Of course, some people will be more receptive to this advice than others.