How do you go about making friends as an adult?

@miller0304 Hello, I'm 67 and time has flown. I feel 17, young, confident, self-assured and I was an extrovert. I was involved in the ecology club, drama, music, intramurals. If I had a part in a play, you could count on me to ad lib. Singing in a group was glorious. Singing a solo? That's when I first became aware of my anxiety and it manifested itself in my breathing. If you can't breathe, you can't sing.
Without going into boring details, a couple of years ago, my psychiatrist explained to me that he thinks I am an introverted extrovert. Not recognized in the DSM 4322...LOL...my psychiatrist explained that over the years, I developed a self-imposed restrictive behavior--kind of a way to prevent rejection. There's alot of psycho babble on introverted extroverts and vice versa. I've read quite a few articles. So, slowly I've been putting myself out there. Mostly online in the last couple of years, at least joking around, trying to be witty rather than sarcastic.
I was visiting my friend in Colorado. We were at a Walgreens and she was calling me from the register: "Come on you old wobbly lady!" "Old Wobbly Lady...you mean an OWL? An Old Wonderful Lady?"
I have since refined my OWL status to Outstandingly Witty Lady. I have a pink owl on a Keychain to remind me of that day. I stood up for myself. Turned a negative into a positive, and for a moment, I was an extrovert.
I'll keep practicing.
BTW...my friend and I have known each other since the 2nd grade.
I cherish our friendship. It is indeed difficult to reach out to others. However, when a window of opportunity opens, I do reach out more often.
I figure, I might find a person as lonely as me, but I'll be a little braver, say hello and bring that person a little spark of motivation.
"Hope is the joyful expectation expectation of great things to come."--unknown

How to meet people? Here's a shot, Me, I flew down to phoenix Az to help elderly mother move back to MPLS. I was told a week to pack and load pod now that I'm here it looks more like 2 weeks. So I'm excited to go see new top gun movie maverick . ANYBODY IN THE CHANDLER, MESA,TEMPE AREA INTERESTED IN GOING TO SEE THIS MOVIE AND GETTING A BITE TO EAT BEFORE OR AFTER THE SHOW? Today is monday June 6 looks like I'll be flying back around the 18 of June so anytime between those dates I'm available have a great day dave

@davej
Very proactive!
Very cool!
Very extroverted!
I, living in NC...won't hop on a plane to see Top Gun...but would reach out to say, 'Hi!"
Or as they say in the South: "Hey! 'preciate it!"

Such a good topic.
@marjou started a similar discussion that I think @miller0304 and others will appreciate here:
- How to have relationships while living with depression? https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/how-to-have-relationships-while-living-with-depression/

I agree with you completely…the “pandemic” has had far reaching negative life changes than I think a lot don’t even realize. Things still aren’t normal, & who knows how long it will take. Especially people who were sick during & older folks…I fit both categories.

Just go out and put a smile on your face ! Breaks the tension right off. Choose to say hello and strike up a conversation with someone. We all have issues in life and more people out there suffer from depression than are willing to admit. People will either like you where you are in life and be understanding or they are not good material for a friendship anyway ! Choose to maybe go get help for the insecurities and fears you have if possible. Can meet other wonderful people in group settings also. We all are going thru something !!

thank you for your responses and reactions. they all mean a lot to me.

I have been dealing with depression on and off for awhile. Church friends online have helped me get thru it many times. They have many times been friendlier then relatives and at least offer to pray for me and my family. I lost my only friend from childhood because she couldn't take the stress of my life. Yet I know others who have more stress in their lives then I have.

i have no friends except some phone or online friends. only one do i open up to, i don't know why. i also have a lot of stress in my life: i was supposed to have cataract surgery today but my daughter woke up with a flare up of her colitis so she couldn't go with me. i had no one else to ask! now i have to wait till sept. to have the surgery because my doc is all booked up. should i go on? nah, it's not worth it. the stress is always there, in one way or another. but life continues to move on and i've got to move with it. i'm sorry you feel badly.

We need to be able to take risks when meeting new people! There is always the risk of being rejected but that's not a problem because there are millions of other people we can meet. I find talking to people who are walking their dogs is a great way to start interaction. It is just a matter of extending ourselves and not waiting for others to make contact with us!