How about a laugh, (hopefully)

Posted by Leonard @jakedduck1, Dec 31, 2018

I believe laughter is the best medicine. Laughter has actually been scientifically proven to help people with depression issues.
Let’s give it a try so we can all get happy and feel better. Many Epilepsy forums I’ve been on had joke sections. I was probably the biggest joke of all since I didn’t get a lot of the jokes. They said the jokes couldn’t be above 4th grade level for me to understand them so my jokes may be rather simplistic but let’s give it a try.
Have a lovely day everyone,
Jake

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Sue, Volunteer Mentor | @sueinmn | Dec 10, 2021

In reply to @jakedduck1 "A guy driving his pick-up truck towing a horse trailer, along the highway by the Pine..." + (show)

Groan!!

Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Dec 10, 2021

Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.

He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.

The 10:00 PM news was coming on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a

large building preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"

Bob says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."

The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"

Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building,

falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your

money."

Bob replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news and so I knew he would

jump."

The blond replied, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."

Bob took the money......

imallears | @imallears | Dec 10, 2021

@jakedduck1

I am a chemically enhanced blonde highlighted brownish reddish female. Got any jokes about that?

FL Mary

Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Dec 11, 2021

In reply to @imallears "@jakedduck1 I am a chemically enhanced blonde highlighted brownish reddish female. Got any jokes about that?..." + (show)

@imallears
Blimey, You have got to be a sight to behold. You must look like a walking rainbow. I bet you could sell tickets, “Florida’s Greatest Curiosity” bet curiosity seekers would be lined up all the way to Miami.
Can’t think of any jokes off the top of my head but I’ll work on it.
If I go to bed at all tonight It’ll be with a big smile on my face!!!
You are a kick,
Jake

Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Dec 11, 2021

In reply to @sueinmn "Groan!!" + (show)

@sueinmn
Good morning,
I thought that joke was great!!! Maybe you you need to reread it.
Granted its not exactly gut wrenching funny but its not a groaner either.
Jake

imallears | @imallears | Dec 11, 2021

In reply to @jakedduck1 "@imallears Blimey, You have got to be a sight to behold. You must look like a..." + (show)

@jakedduck1

Yes I am a kick but no I am not a rainbow. What I meant was that I am a brownish reddish girl with blonde highlights to hide all the well earned gray that creeped in over the years. Does that make me a wannabe Blonde? I just used “girl” to describe myself. Now THAT is funny.

FL Blondie Mary

Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Dec 14, 2021

In reply to @imallears "@jakedduck1 Yes I am a kick but no I am not a rainbow. What I meant..." + (show)

When you called yourself a girl you were obviously delusional.
Your hair may not have all the colors of the rainbow but I still think you qualify as a rainbow. I think you’re a beautiful person just like a rainbow.
Jake

imallears | @imallears | Dec 14, 2021

@jakedduck1

What a great end to my day. I happen to think you are a beautiful person too and it is very evident. I will close now before this gets too mushy lol. Thank you….gray roots and all.

This old girl…..FL Mary

Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Jan 5, 2022

When God created the donkey, he said:

“As a donkey, you’ll work day and night, and you’ll carry on your back heavy baggage.

You’ll eat grass and you’ll have low IQ.

You’ll be living for 50 years.”

“But my God, 50 years is a lot of time for that kind of life! Give me only 30.” And so it happened.

Then, God created the dog:

“As a dog, you’ll guard man’s property and you’ll be his staunch/loyal friend. You’ll eat their left overs and you’ll be living for 25 years.”

“Oh, Mighty God. This kind of life is unbearable. Give me only 10 years to live, please.” And so it happened.

Then, God created the monkey:

”As a monkey, you’ll jump around, tree to tree, and you’ll act like a fool so people can be entertained by you. You life will last 20 years.”

“No, God, please! Don’t let me suffer for that long. Give me only 10 years to live.” And so it happened.

Last, God created the Man:

“You’re a Man. You’re the only sensible being on the planet earth. You’ll use your intelligence to dominate the other creatures. You’ll be in charge. Your life will last 20 years.”

“But my one and only God, 20 years is not too long to achieve my goal.

I beg you to give me the donkey’s 20 years, dog’s 15 years and monkey's 10 years.”

And so it happen.

Since then, a man lives for 20 years as a man.

Then, he gets married and works as a donkey for 20 years by carrying heavy baggage night and day.

Then, he has children and lives as a dog, guarding the house and his property, eating family left overs.

And when he grows old, he lives like a monkey. He’s his grandchildren's entertainer by acting like a fool!