No one likes to repeat themselves, apparently

Sensing actual sounds that you cannot hear is different from acoustic hallicinations, where you "hear" sounds that are not actually happening presently, although you did hear them at some time in the past. Apparently, your brain stores these up and occasionally releases them to give you something to listen to. I have them off and on at all different times, but KNOW that there's no big machine running in the part basement under my bedroom: there's nothing down there to run or make any noise, except the occasional raccoon or less occasional packrat! I often "hear" the dishwasher running while I'm working in the quiet of my office--but (a) I've never been able to hear the dishwasher here, and (b) I know that I didn't push "start." Still, I often hear the water swishing around, dishes clicking. By the time we installed a dishwasher in what was then a part-time beach house, I was only able to hear it if I was standing right next to it, certainly never from across the house. Some of what I hear while lying in bed in total quiet is something I heard recently. After I've spent a couple of hours mowing a section of what we laughingly refer to as "lawn," I "hear" the lawnmower while I'm lying in bed. Here, in the spruce forests, it's pretty quiet at night: cars seldom move along our one-lane gravel road, people and dogs aren't out walking. I've pitched a tent in the yard in an attempt to see the elk that frequent the place during the night (new droppings most mornings) when there's moonlight, but I've never heard them or seen them. Worse, I've trained my dog, who shares the tent, to never bark at deer or elk...a couple of times I woke in the morning to find that there had been an elk very close to our tent, although I hadn't known.

I do the smiling a lot and usually nodding my head. Even when I have no idea what was said. It’s usually those brief passings that this happens to. I do know o dread putting in my “ears” in the morning because that begins the tiresome listening part of my day. My husband hates when I don’t put my ears in right away. But I need those moments of silence.

I also try to always state immediately that I have a severe hearing loss...especially on the phone. Many people try and actually have no idea how fast or too quietly (for me) they speak. I often stop the conversation multiple times...repeating the apology that it's me, thank you for your patience, I appreciate your effort and similar comments. Some people are like telemarketers and always start at the beginning of a long spiel even though I might say," I did not hear that last sentence." My husband repeats the whole long sentence even though I repeatedly tell him I only miss the last few words. MANY people in our culture "trail off" a the end of their sentences - speaking quieter and sometimes faster. SO VERY frustrating. Some folks respond kindly and really try even though in a long conversation I may need to remind them. Others do not change one bit!! and get an aggravated, impatient voice...then I end the call and/or try for another representative. So much more difficult on the phone. I have Caption call and sometimes the captions are so "off" and it's more confusing to try to listen and read what are obviously the wrong words. Oh well. As FL Mary says - it could be worse!

As a group, we hard of hearing folks have to understand that our hearing loss affects other people too. The comments on this thread also show that while we are all different, we are also very much the same. When we misunderstand and ask for clarification we are trying to remain in the conversation. When we bluff by nodding and smiling we can get ourselves in big trouble by agreeing to something we totally disagree with. Asking for people to repeat or re phrase often leads to the dreaded "Never mind, it wasn't important' response. That sets us back a pace or two. It's also a put off that makes us feel 'not important'. But, it is a reality with hearing loss, and unless a person has hearing loss themselves, they never completely understand this.

There are ways to help ourselves that only a handful use. I'm thinking of streamers and BlueTooth or direct audio input microphones that we can use in noisy settings. I never leave home without my Mini Mic, a device that can sync with both cochlear implant processors and specific hearing aids. It makes it possible for me to hear when I'm out for dinner, at a party, etc. Is it perfect? No, I still miss some things, but it helps tremendously. That technoology has kept me from becoming reclusive. It has also helped my relationships with family, friends, etc.

Why don't more people use these devices? A couple of reasons: 1. They don't know they exist because hearing healthcare providers don't tell people about these options. 2. they show when they are being used, and many people spend more energy trying to hide their hearing devices than actually trying to hear. 3. They cost money to purchase. Yes, they are add ons. People who sell hearing aids don't want to discuss these things because they are already trying to sell a product that is extremely expensive.

I have learned more about these types of devices from other hard of hearing people than from all the professionals I've seen in the 50 years that I've had hearing loss.

How many people in this discussion are using assistive technology that goes beyond your hearing aids?

True and interesting...I noticed while trying to hear something on tv(bad sound on something from England) I cupped my hand against my better ear and towards the tv and I could hear VERY clearly and was able to even turn the sound down!.I did this off and on...and it worked every time. Maybe a good old fashioned Ear Horn is all I need? Anyways am going to experiment more. I live out in the country so accessing city stores etc is sometimes hard and not in my budet. Will be great if I can figure out a do-it-youself thing.

🙂 I have an antique ear horn that I sometimes use in displays and presentations. The funniest part is that YES, it works because it directs the ear towards the sound, which is exactly what you have described doing. Obviously, modern hearing aids do a lot more.

Thanks..Hearing aid is too expensive right now, but thanks for your remarks..I'll let you know what I come up with. Take care and walk in peace.

@julieo4

Hi

I can’t tell you the number of devices I have either trialed or used. Pocket talker was pretty much a dismal failure over the years as my hearing got worse. I tried some of the Phonak accessories and they did not help at all….brought in more noise and really worked only well in a quiet one on one setting where I don’t need it. Only occasionally worked and I asked my Audi to let me trial the Roger Pen. I’m lucky that I don’t have to pay anything upfront for trials. I have had conversations with so many people who belong to the local chapter of HHLA and the majority are not impressed with the various devices they have used…a few are…and have abandoned the gadgets. This is not a large group by any means but I rarely see anyone using type of device.

I resort to my phone captioned apps for now and am willing to try just about anything else. I have a neckloop and use it with my tcoils but for a different use.

I’ll let you know about the bone anchored trial which is this Thursday. I should know immediately if there is any chance of improvement for the worse ear. Having tinnitus in that ear doesn’t help and I am happy you found a solution. Still looking…always looking

FL Mary

@joyces
I hear the same sound every night. I really don't notice it when I have my hearing aids in but it sounds like machinery. I can't think of what it could possibly be replicating though. Possibly the sound the furnace makes when it turns on?

@shirla People do trail off frequently. We went to a one-person show with Rita Rudner once and with each joke she trailed off and I missed every punch line! I was so frustrated. My husband said she was very funny, but I'm the fan!

@julieo4 I must admit I do bluff a lot. I used to hate it when my daughter was in HS because she was extremely self-conscious of her hearing aids and would only wear one and have her hair covering that one. She would go on a date and I would be thinking "what is she saying YES to?"!
The "Never mind, it wasn't important' response." is the worse. It really does feel like since you can't hear you are just dismissed. So frustrating and can be depressing also.

@imallears My audiologist had me trial the Phonaks and the Roger for a month two years ago. It was the Roger accessory that you put on a table so it helps you hear everyone. It did not help at all. As you said, it just made everything louder, and it's very expensive. I think in a quiet environment like a conference room for a business meeting, it might help.
I have Oticons and I do find in certain situations that my Oticon Connect is very helpful. Prior to the pandemic I was in some water aerobics classes and one of the instructors taught from the side of the pool, not in the pool. She would use the Connect clip and I could hear her perfectly. Yes, I do wear my HAs in the pool, my head never goes under. The Connect also helps in the car. It is not much help in very noisy places like restaurants though.
JK

Years ago our HLAA chapter ordered 10 inexpensive neckloops from a supplier. We were all disappointed in them as they didn't have the strength needed for most of our hearing losses. We then tried a better brand and those worked well. It was a lesson for all of us. It's always interesting at HLAA National conventions to see people using different devices. Also nice to have exhibitors there to show us what's new and let us try it to see how it works for us. I do know people who say they are not 'gadget people', and don't even try them. The 2022 national convention will be in Tampa FL next June. I hope you can attend.

What do you use your neckloop for?