Your Tips on How to Get Off to the Best Start with a New Specialist

I'm looking for your best tips.
Starting a relationship with a new specialist can be daunting. You want to get off to a good start and ensure that you establish mutual respect and are able to develop trust. You want to know you're in good hands. What is their expertise and experience? What research are they doing? Will they listen and consider your input?

How do you get off to the best start with a new provider? What suggestions would you tell a friend who is going to see a new doctor?

+++UPDATE+++
Your tips in action: Tips shared in the discussion below made this video. It's great advice: For patients by patients.
https://youtu.be/Bw-RrEKTt60

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Visiting Mayo Clinic Support Group.

@sunnyflower, I appreciate what you wrote about medical staff complaining about what they considered a "patient's laundry list" of symptoms at office visits. When I received 3 diagnoses for chronic health issues within the last year, I first started researching all I could learn about each and how to better manage them. I also typed questions for each specialist, and asked them to read them at the visits. I didn't share a list of a bazillion symptoms or questions about what I could do better or watch for but one doc in particular, resented my request, saying "I have a clinic full of patients to see and can't address each item on this sheet". The 6 items were brief; more to keep me on track and to get answers because otherwise, I'm always afraid I'll leave without remembering what I most needed help with. I was very hurt by her response because she had been one of my most favorite docs until that day.

I think it wonderful that many patients on the Connect forums write about how their specialsts work as a "team" and individually take the time to discuss procedures, recommendations and answer questions. While we are all acutely aware that physicians have heavy work loads and are limited in the time they can allow each patient, I also know how 'thin skinned" some can be and either feel "threatened" or "irritated" if a "difficult patient" questions a med or procedure and about what effects it may have.

Knowledge is power and I've learned that the patient bears a great responsibility in learning how to manage and become a patient advocate. I'm also learning, at least with mine, that docs treating older patients with multiple health issues do not want to discuss anything about the effects of treatment for one malady may adversely another chronic condition. I hope sharing my experience is helpful to others and I appreciate what you cautioned.

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@fiesty76

@sunnyflower, I appreciate what you wrote about medical staff complaining about what they considered a "patient's laundry list" of symptoms at office visits. When I received 3 diagnoses for chronic health issues within the last year, I first started researching all I could learn about each and how to better manage them. I also typed questions for each specialist, and asked them to read them at the visits. I didn't share a list of a bazillion symptoms or questions about what I could do better or watch for but one doc in particular, resented my request, saying "I have a clinic full of patients to see and can't address each item on this sheet". The 6 items were brief; more to keep me on track and to get answers because otherwise, I'm always afraid I'll leave without remembering what I most needed help with. I was very hurt by her response because she had been one of my most favorite docs until that day.

I think it wonderful that many patients on the Connect forums write about how their specialsts work as a "team" and individually take the time to discuss procedures, recommendations and answer questions. While we are all acutely aware that physicians have heavy work loads and are limited in the time they can allow each patient, I also know how 'thin skinned" some can be and either feel "threatened" or "irritated" if a "difficult patient" questions a med or procedure and about what effects it may have.

Knowledge is power and I've learned that the patient bears a great responsibility in learning how to manage and become a patient advocate. I'm also learning, at least with mine, that docs treating older patients with multiple health issues do not want to discuss anything about the effects of treatment for one malady may adversely another chronic condition. I hope sharing my experience is helpful to others and I appreciate what you cautioned.

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Hello feisty76, I am sorry this happened to you. I completely understand.
Patients, including myself, can be very intimidated by doctors. We must remember that essentially we employ them. At the same time, they essentially hold our lives in their hands!

Except for unexpected urgent patients that need to be worked in to their schedule as a double or triple book, or an unexpected significant finding during a scheduled appointment, doctors (and often their nurses) own/control their schedules.

When you schedule your appointments, you could try saying that you have several important things that you need to be addressed at the appointment and from experience, you will need a longer appointment time so the doctor can stay on schedule. You could add that you are elderly, in pain and that it is a hardship for you to get there. It's worth a try.

You could also talk to the doctor about that and they can flag you in the system to schedule you for a longer appointment time when you need an appointment.

Those are things that have worked for me.

I wish you all the best! Warmest regards, Sunnyflower 😊

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@sunnyflower, Thank you for your tips and suggestions. Usually my doc visits go well but guess I was venting earlier because sometimes some docs seem to blow off questions because I am elderly with several conditions. Bye-the-bye, I also smile when I see your moniker: "sunnyflower" because I'm an outdoor sunshine gal too! Thanks again for listening and responding.

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@sunnyflower

Hello feisty76, I am sorry this happened to you. I completely understand.
Patients, including myself, can be very intimidated by doctors. We must remember that essentially we employ them. At the same time, they essentially hold our lives in their hands!

Except for unexpected urgent patients that need to be worked in to their schedule as a double or triple book, or an unexpected significant finding during a scheduled appointment, doctors (and often their nurses) own/control their schedules.

When you schedule your appointments, you could try saying that you have several important things that you need to be addressed at the appointment and from experience, you will need a longer appointment time so the doctor can stay on schedule. You could add that you are elderly, in pain and that it is a hardship for you to get there. It's worth a try.

You could also talk to the doctor about that and they can flag you in the system to schedule you for a longer appointment time when you need an appointment.

Those are things that have worked for me.

I wish you all the best! Warmest regards, Sunnyflower 😊

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@sunnyflower My husband has had a rude awakening recently. For the last 30 years, his insurance was through Kaiser Permanente. He enjoyed having drs under one location, for the most part, and dedicated hospitals. Everyone took their time with him, and he received excellent care before, during, and post-kidney transplant. Now we have moved where he doesn't have access, and had to source out [basically I did the research and let him make final decision] new providers. His new nephrologist also runs a dialysis unit. My husband had to find out the hard way that to this Dr, the more patients seen in a day, the more he can bill, so appts are very brief. Fortunately he is very healthy and has no problems.
Ginger

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@gingerw

@sunnyflower My husband has had a rude awakening recently. For the last 30 years, his insurance was through Kaiser Permanente. He enjoyed having drs under one location, for the most part, and dedicated hospitals. Everyone took their time with him, and he received excellent care before, during, and post-kidney transplant. Now we have moved where he doesn't have access, and had to source out [basically I did the research and let him make final decision] new providers. His new nephrologist also runs a dialysis unit. My husband had to find out the hard way that to this Dr, the more patients seen in a day, the more he can bill, so appts are very brief. Fortunately he is very healthy and has no problems.
Ginger

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Hi Ginger, wow, you guys have been through a lot! I 'm really sorry to hear about this but very glad to hear that your hubby is doing well!
I am a Kaiser Permanente patient. I love my insurance plan (Medicare Advantage) and what the HMO affords me. I use outside preferred providers when I want.
The problems I encounter a lot are usually system failures. It can be easy to fall through the cracks and I have several times!
Otherwise I am very grateful to have the care that I do. I feel very blessed.
Fondly, Sunnyflower 😊

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@gingerw

@sunnyflower My husband has had a rude awakening recently. For the last 30 years, his insurance was through Kaiser Permanente. He enjoyed having drs under one location, for the most part, and dedicated hospitals. Everyone took their time with him, and he received excellent care before, during, and post-kidney transplant. Now we have moved where he doesn't have access, and had to source out [basically I did the research and let him make final decision] new providers. His new nephrologist also runs a dialysis unit. My husband had to find out the hard way that to this Dr, the more patients seen in a day, the more he can bill, so appts are very brief. Fortunately he is very healthy and has no problems.
Ginger

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@gingerw, Your hubby is fortunate to have a helper to research new providers. Take a bow, my friend. And yes, I've appreciated my good medical coverage through retired teachers, formerly Aetna and currently Humana where all my docs and procedures were covered without question or hassle. Always a bit nerve wracking with any changes for this old bird but particularly with news of a new provider. We are changing again in January and can only hope coverage will continue as before.

Glad your guy is doing well. My nephrologist Also is part owner in the next door dialysis unit and while, very thankfully I'm not needing dialysis, her "agreement', whatever that means, with the lab she assigns has me vigorously nodding in agreement that some docs are far more interested in the number of patients who can be seen per day than the current health issues of the patient. Can't wait for a new neph. and can only cross my fingers that I get one more interested in patient care.

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@tim1028

I think that it's a good idea to plan your visit by writing down questions, as you think of them, then making a list from the most important questions to the least important questions. Type the list, making two copies, one for you and one for the specialist. You get a limited amount of time, so don't bring up things that are irrelevant to the specific concerns you have for the specialist. Be brief, be blunt. By planning ahead, I can cram in a lot into a short visit. And these days, the visits are getting shorter and shorter.

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..so many good ideas on this page. I made up a list of meds for my husband (20) and did add at bottom of page that he is a smoker and alcohol consumer: may as well be honest. On my short list of meds I have for the last few years added my Glaucoma eyedrops. When first on them one of the pharmacists said dont worry J. they stay in your eyes... well, sorry, no they dont. Eye drops find their way into your body and you "can" have side effects. Now I lightly press the inside of my closed eyes after applying drops so the drops stay in eyes more than going down the back of your nose, but some still do as you can "taste them." Also am thinking of adding to his list (at bottom) the medication he uses for his toenail fungus (ugh)... but am noticing more and more that many OTC even have warnings on them. Not sure if has been suggested, but try and get a copy of all tests you have done in case you change doctors etc...... great site, thanks!

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@lacy2

..so many good ideas on this page. I made up a list of meds for my husband (20) and did add at bottom of page that he is a smoker and alcohol consumer: may as well be honest. On my short list of meds I have for the last few years added my Glaucoma eyedrops. When first on them one of the pharmacists said dont worry J. they stay in your eyes... well, sorry, no they dont. Eye drops find their way into your body and you "can" have side effects. Now I lightly press the inside of my closed eyes after applying drops so the drops stay in eyes more than going down the back of your nose, but some still do as you can "taste them." Also am thinking of adding to his list (at bottom) the medication he uses for his toenail fungus (ugh)... but am noticing more and more that many OTC even have warnings on them. Not sure if has been suggested, but try and get a copy of all tests you have done in case you change doctors etc...... great site, thanks!

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@lacy2, Thank you for sharing! This is a good reminder as we start the new year!
Another thing to add to the list is any vitamins or supplements that you take.

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@rosemarya

@lacy2, Thank you for sharing! This is a good reminder as we start the new year!
Another thing to add to the list is any vitamins or supplements that you take.

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....there are web sites in USA and Canada I have used where we can type in the name/s of our meds and find out if there is a possible interaction, as well some sites give information on food (I think we have all been warned about eating grapefruit with some meds.)
Husband on many meds as he has diabetes and open heart surgery in November... pages and pages from Pharmacy about warnings etc. etc. and its really overwhelming, and a pharmacist who says oh that's just for insurance purposes for manufacturer etc. There have been so many pages we don't always read them yet last week I did and one - Candesartan(Cilexetil)/Atacand the information page says "limit potassium containing foods - bananas, oranges, avocados tomatoes, potatoes and fried fruits." WE had no idea.
Also the 20 meds he is on ALL have alternative names (as has Candesartan) and the drug name on the pill bottle may not be the same name as on the list given him by attending doctor in the hospital. Not complaining, but it is very very confusing.
A few months ago I told a doctor I was taking Rivotril and he didnt know what that was - its Clonazepam and I think in USA Klonapin. I don't know if anyone else is confused or concerned but I am and with many new meds with exes XX and zeds ZZ and lengthy names, similar names, even medical personnel have to take a second look.
Glad we have these meds to help us but single meds or taking multiple meds, might be a good idea to have someone review them or even, if we can, do it ourselves. As an example, a visiting nurse noticed he had been given FOUR blood thinners on discharge (old meds already on and new meds).. from which he could have bled to death. Had she not noticed.... well, hate to think what could have happened... just to say, without wanting to upset anyone, might be a good idea to double check prescription, over the counter, "natural" remedies and even home remedies to make sure they don't add to our woes? J.

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@tdrell

@colleenyoung ….I would if l were starting with a new doctor....be on time or early to appt...bring my insurance cards....bring copies of relevant tests and CD's and current meds even if l had requested they would be sent ahead....have a list of questions. I would also give the front desk a list of name of doctor (s) and addresses l want their report to be sent to. tdrell

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good luck on doing that🙄

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