Hello @chocolate5lover I think a lot about this. I'm a cancer "survivor" on a Facebook group with others like me and people will often complain that their family doesn't "get it". Every case is different but I think in my case and others the family expects you to move on after the initial treatment but you can't move on and suddenly realise how lonely it is to have a chronic or life-threatening illness. The only people who really understand are those who have been through the same thing. I hope this makes sense. I have felt abandoned by my family before - not at this point no - but I know how you must feel.
I wish that I could offer some comfort. I am very fortunate in that my wife and I are "Empty Nesters" and we both understand that the family gets sick, not just the individual.
I have out of control diabetes and my wife and I both have altered our lifestyles and eating habits which makes things much easier for me. Further, my wife is actively involved with my monitoring and asks every blood test time what my blood sugar is. She even calls me at work to ask.
It wasn't easy for us to jump onto the straight-and-narrow. It took a massive bilateral PE and a week of me in ICU to scare us both straight.
I like the classes idea. I suggested that to a high school teacher last eve that has concerns for one of her students. I suggested a "Home Ec" like setting using the magazine "Diabetes Forecast" as a teaching and study guide. Maybe the same sorts of groups could be assembled as social groups where diabetics or anyone else with any other health issues quorum together to fix meals, learn and socialize.
I wish that I could offer some comfort. I am very fortunate in that my wife and I are "Empty Nesters" and we both understand that the family gets sick, not just the individual.
I have out of control diabetes and my wife and I both have altered our lifestyles and eating habits which makes things much easier for me. Further, my wife is actively involved with my monitoring and asks every blood test time what my blood sugar is. She even calls me at work to ask.
It wasn't easy for us to jump onto the straight-and-narrow. It took a massive bilateral PE and a week of me in ICU to scare us both straight.
I like the classes idea. I suggested that to a high school teacher last eve that has concerns for one of her students. I suggested a "Home Ec" like setting using the magazine "Diabetes Forecast" as a teaching and study guide. Maybe the same sorts of groups could be assembled as social groups where diabetics or anyone else with any other health issues quorum together to fix meals, learn and socialize.
@mark_fugate Thank you for sharing here. I also was a Type I diabetic unable to control my blood sugars until I received a pancreas transplant. May I ask what type diabetes you have, how long you have had the diagnosis and how you have been advised to manage it? I agree that a group or class for diabetics could have many benefits in a community, but I also see some possible dangers. With no medical input a sharing group can lead you astray with "alternate" recommendations; and if led by a medical expert sharing may be limited and the group may become more like a college lecture. A balance of the two would have been best for me and drawn me in. Hopefully you can follow through and help your community begin something like this not only for diabetics but also for their friends and family.
I feel I must admonish you and your wife a bit. Your diabetes is your responsibility. It is good your wife is interested, keeps up on your condition and needs, and assists with daily management;, but it sounds like she may have taken on the role of mother/warden in your life. You need to protect your marriage by taking the lead in taking responsibility for your disease. Be forever grateful for her love and support, and be glad that in a crisis she knows how to help you; but day to day she should not have to worry about your behavior while you are away from her. I am sorry to scold you like this, but please discuss this with your wife and hopefully build a better life together. Blessings.
I am a type 2 was diagnosed a few years ago. A pulmonary embolism is what sent everything crazy.
I fully understand that it is my responsibility. Things are much easier when the family gets involved. We actually make it a challenge because we both enjoy cooking and diabetes puts constraints and challenges on food preparation creativity
@221946 Thank you for sharing. I do not have the same diagnoses as you, but I do have trouble with language -- particularly finding the right word during a conversation. I have noticed this since 2009 after an episode of a severe migraine caused by a swollen brain. My physicians keep telling me that this is just aging, but I know it is not since it is clearly related to the migraine episode. It felt like a stroke to me, but testing in the ER did not support that diagnoses. Are there things you do to maintain your brain health and reduce progression? I am interested in possibilities to slow progression of functional losses. Thank you for any information you can provide. Blessings to you.
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Hello @chocolate5lover I think a lot about this. I'm a cancer "survivor" on a Facebook group with others like me and people will often complain that their family doesn't "get it". Every case is different but I think in my case and others the family expects you to move on after the initial treatment but you can't move on and suddenly realise how lonely it is to have a chronic or life-threatening illness. The only people who really understand are those who have been through the same thing. I hope this makes sense. I have felt abandoned by my family before - not at this point no - but I know how you must feel.
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2 ReactionsCan you sign up for living with diabetes class? I signed up for the class. It's once per week. I think its support and teaching all in one.
I wish that I could offer some comfort. I am very fortunate in that my wife and I are "Empty Nesters" and we both understand that the family gets sick, not just the individual.
I have out of control diabetes and my wife and I both have altered our lifestyles and eating habits which makes things much easier for me. Further, my wife is actively involved with my monitoring and asks every blood test time what my blood sugar is. She even calls me at work to ask.
It wasn't easy for us to jump onto the straight-and-narrow. It took a massive bilateral PE and a week of me in ICU to scare us both straight.
I like the classes idea. I suggested that to a high school teacher last eve that has concerns for one of her students. I suggested a "Home Ec" like setting using the magazine "Diabetes Forecast" as a teaching and study guide. Maybe the same sorts of groups could be assembled as social groups where diabetics or anyone else with any other health issues quorum together to fix meals, learn and socialize.
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Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 Reactions@mark_fugate Thank you for sharing here. I also was a Type I diabetic unable to control my blood sugars until I received a pancreas transplant. May I ask what type diabetes you have, how long you have had the diagnosis and how you have been advised to manage it? I agree that a group or class for diabetics could have many benefits in a community, but I also see some possible dangers. With no medical input a sharing group can lead you astray with "alternate" recommendations; and if led by a medical expert sharing may be limited and the group may become more like a college lecture. A balance of the two would have been best for me and drawn me in. Hopefully you can follow through and help your community begin something like this not only for diabetics but also for their friends and family.
I feel I must admonish you and your wife a bit. Your diabetes is your responsibility. It is good your wife is interested, keeps up on your condition and needs, and assists with daily management;, but it sounds like she may have taken on the role of mother/warden in your life. You need to protect your marriage by taking the lead in taking responsibility for your disease. Be forever grateful for her love and support, and be glad that in a crisis she knows how to help you; but day to day she should not have to worry about your behavior while you are away from her. I am sorry to scold you like this, but please discuss this with your wife and hopefully build a better life together. Blessings.
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Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsI am a type 2 was diagnosed a few years ago. A pulmonary embolism is what sent everything crazy.
I fully understand that it is my responsibility. Things are much easier when the family gets involved. We actually make it a challenge because we both enjoy cooking and diabetes puts constraints and challenges on food preparation creativity
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Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsI thought I was the only one. I agree that family just get too busy coping with whatever. I was diagnosed with FTD in 2016.
@221946 Thank you for sharing. I do not have the same diagnoses as you, but I do have trouble with language -- particularly finding the right word during a conversation. I have noticed this since 2009 after an episode of a severe migraine caused by a swollen brain. My physicians keep telling me that this is just aging, but I know it is not since it is clearly related to the migraine episode. It felt like a stroke to me, but testing in the ER did not support that diagnoses. Are there things you do to maintain your brain health and reduce progression? I am interested in possibilities to slow progression of functional losses. Thank you for any information you can provide. Blessings to you.
I don't do anything specifically for my brain. I exercise regularly because I want to. Balance issues are more of a concern than anything else.
@221946 Thank you! I never connected that frontal brain damage might affect balance. That clears up a lot of things for me!
Absolutely ! See : No Love Involved Caregiver, I just posted here.