Adults On The Autism Spectrum

Posted by Mamacita, Alumna Mentor @mamacita, Apr 29, 2018

Maybe you were really shy as a child. Perhaps you took home a huge stack of books from the school library, read them, and returned them the next day. Or did your best friend find you crying in your closet, unable to answer the question "Why?" At any rate, your life could be traced to the Self-Help section of the local bookstore. Unfortunately, most of the books were not much help. ADHD seemed to fit, at times. Your shrink said you might be Bi-Polar, although she wasn't really certain. All you knew was that you rarely fit in, anywhere. One day at work, it hit you square in the face: I don't speak these people's language! Really, it was like you were all playing this game, and everyone knew the rules but you. You couldn't tell a joke, and you never "got" any joke your co-worker tried to tell you. People started getting annoyed with you, because you had a memory like a steel trap. They didn't appreciate it when you called them on the carpet. Who knew? This was my life, and worse. I finally aced several tests that pointed me to the answer to my questions. The Autism Spectrum. Guess what? Little kids with Autism grow up to be Adults with Autism. Diagnosed late in life? This is the place for you!

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Autism (ASD) Support Group.

This is just a general statement here, throwing it out and just seeing where it lands. In the time that I have been here with this discussion on Adults On The Autism Spectrum, I have received many interesting comments about our discussions. I have pondered long and hard about the direction that this site needs to take. For every person out there who comments or likes a posting, there are perhaps hundreds who read it and don't say anything back.

Now, I am not simply pulling this out of my big ol' Gramma Jane purse to somehow impress you or make you think better of me or the group here. My self esteem does not depend on whether people like what I do or not. That's a perk of old age. I just don't care. I have too much on my plate to worry about whether someone has an accurate assessment of who I am or what I do.

Hurt people hurt people. If I have hurt any of you in any way whatsoever, I am deeply sorry. I myself have lived through enough hurt and anguish to cover at least ten lifetimes. People who know me really well have said that I should write a book about my experiences and how I survived. That will likely never happen, because the memories are best left in the past. Unless I can draw from those experiences to help someone. Which I do, frequently.

Back to the direction this group should take. Sometimes life is indeed rainbows and lollipops. Other times it is dirt on your face and mud on your boots. Sometimes it is an ocean, where there is no life boat, and you cannot swim. I like to think that this site is a safe, open, honest gathering of beautiful souls who share some common experiences. Adults who are wired a little differently. Or a whole lot different, in my case!

At any rate, I feel compelled to say that life is what you make it. You can't lie to people and pretend everything is ok when it's not. But we've all done it. We do it when people ask us how we are, out of concern, and we tell them " I'm fine". It is a fine line to walk, between sharing your own personal truth, and wanting to encourage, to give hope, and support.

I will end this conversation by saying this about that. Some days you're the bug. Some days you're the windshield. Oh, and keep your words sweet. You may have to eat them one day!

Good morning me lovelies, and have an Ausome day!

REPLY
@mamacita

This is just a general statement here, throwing it out and just seeing where it lands. In the time that I have been here with this discussion on Adults On The Autism Spectrum, I have received many interesting comments about our discussions. I have pondered long and hard about the direction that this site needs to take. For every person out there who comments or likes a posting, there are perhaps hundreds who read it and don't say anything back.

Now, I am not simply pulling this out of my big ol' Gramma Jane purse to somehow impress you or make you think better of me or the group here. My self esteem does not depend on whether people like what I do or not. That's a perk of old age. I just don't care. I have too much on my plate to worry about whether someone has an accurate assessment of who I am or what I do.

Hurt people hurt people. If I have hurt any of you in any way whatsoever, I am deeply sorry. I myself have lived through enough hurt and anguish to cover at least ten lifetimes. People who know me really well have said that I should write a book about my experiences and how I survived. That will likely never happen, because the memories are best left in the past. Unless I can draw from those experiences to help someone. Which I do, frequently.

Back to the direction this group should take. Sometimes life is indeed rainbows and lollipops. Other times it is dirt on your face and mud on your boots. Sometimes it is an ocean, where there is no life boat, and you cannot swim. I like to think that this site is a safe, open, honest gathering of beautiful souls who share some common experiences. Adults who are wired a little differently. Or a whole lot different, in my case!

At any rate, I feel compelled to say that life is what you make it. You can't lie to people and pretend everything is ok when it's not. But we've all done it. We do it when people ask us how we are, out of concern, and we tell them " I'm fine". It is a fine line to walk, between sharing your own personal truth, and wanting to encourage, to give hope, and support.

I will end this conversation by saying this about that. Some days you're the bug. Some days you're the windshield. Oh, and keep your words sweet. You may have to eat them one day!

Good morning me lovelies, and have an Ausome day!

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Then some here must be hurting very much.

REPLY
@parus

Then some here must be hurting very much.

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Dear@parus, yes ma'am. Indeed there are. We cannot make life better for every single person out there. I personally do not have an endless bag of tricks that I can pull out in the event that someone is suffering. I only have what I have. I only have what I have been given.

The kindnesses that have been shown to others, by the people in this group, have helped turn a few lives back around. Given a bit of hope, or put a smile on someone's face. If only for a little while.

Parus, you are to be commended for all the kind and gracious comments you make on a regular basis here and on other Mayo Clinic groups. Your commitment to sharing what you have is appreciated and does not go unnoticed. You are an intelligent, forthright lady with tons of life experiences. Your stories help others identify areas of their own lives, where hope can be found. And when hope is not to be found, there is grit and determination!

We are all changing, every one of us, all the time. I look forward to what lies ahead! Thank you for being here!

Mamacita

REPLY
@mamacita

This is just a general statement here, throwing it out and just seeing where it lands. In the time that I have been here with this discussion on Adults On The Autism Spectrum, I have received many interesting comments about our discussions. I have pondered long and hard about the direction that this site needs to take. For every person out there who comments or likes a posting, there are perhaps hundreds who read it and don't say anything back.

Now, I am not simply pulling this out of my big ol' Gramma Jane purse to somehow impress you or make you think better of me or the group here. My self esteem does not depend on whether people like what I do or not. That's a perk of old age. I just don't care. I have too much on my plate to worry about whether someone has an accurate assessment of who I am or what I do.

Hurt people hurt people. If I have hurt any of you in any way whatsoever, I am deeply sorry. I myself have lived through enough hurt and anguish to cover at least ten lifetimes. People who know me really well have said that I should write a book about my experiences and how I survived. That will likely never happen, because the memories are best left in the past. Unless I can draw from those experiences to help someone. Which I do, frequently.

Back to the direction this group should take. Sometimes life is indeed rainbows and lollipops. Other times it is dirt on your face and mud on your boots. Sometimes it is an ocean, where there is no life boat, and you cannot swim. I like to think that this site is a safe, open, honest gathering of beautiful souls who share some common experiences. Adults who are wired a little differently. Or a whole lot different, in my case!

At any rate, I feel compelled to say that life is what you make it. You can't lie to people and pretend everything is ok when it's not. But we've all done it. We do it when people ask us how we are, out of concern, and we tell them " I'm fine". It is a fine line to walk, between sharing your own personal truth, and wanting to encourage, to give hope, and support.

I will end this conversation by saying this about that. Some days you're the bug. Some days you're the windshield. Oh, and keep your words sweet. You may have to eat them one day!

Good morning me lovelies, and have an Ausome day!

Jump to this post

@mamacita My writings are being slowly collected and collated into one place, that may result in a self-published tome. I haven't decided. But I do know the title is "My Side of the Street". Why? Because I can only keep my side of the street clean, and I only know my side of the street. Now, my experiences may be similar to someone else's, and my experiences and the lessons learned may be helpful to someone else, but I've only walked in my own shoes. So as you have said, I try to be gentle in my words but also it's very truthful and how I feel. It's being authentic to me. Like you, I am at the age where what people think of me just doesn't matter to me. There is a saying at the end of my personal emails that is a quote from Dr. Seuss. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." I truly believe in that. Mamacita, you are one of a kind as we all are. But your wisdom and willingness to lead us and cheer us on is something that I really appreciate.
Ginger

REPLY
@gingerw

@mamacita My writings are being slowly collected and collated into one place, that may result in a self-published tome. I haven't decided. But I do know the title is "My Side of the Street". Why? Because I can only keep my side of the street clean, and I only know my side of the street. Now, my experiences may be similar to someone else's, and my experiences and the lessons learned may be helpful to someone else, but I've only walked in my own shoes. So as you have said, I try to be gentle in my words but also it's very truthful and how I feel. It's being authentic to me. Like you, I am at the age where what people think of me just doesn't matter to me. There is a saying at the end of my personal emails that is a quote from Dr. Seuss. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." I truly believe in that. Mamacita, you are one of a kind as we all are. But your wisdom and willingness to lead us and cheer us on is something that I really appreciate.
Ginger

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I had a long comment here, Ginger. But it evaporated into thin air somehow. So let me just say, I love you, Sistah!

REPLY
@mamacita

This is just a general statement here, throwing it out and just seeing where it lands. In the time that I have been here with this discussion on Adults On The Autism Spectrum, I have received many interesting comments about our discussions. I have pondered long and hard about the direction that this site needs to take. For every person out there who comments or likes a posting, there are perhaps hundreds who read it and don't say anything back.

Now, I am not simply pulling this out of my big ol' Gramma Jane purse to somehow impress you or make you think better of me or the group here. My self esteem does not depend on whether people like what I do or not. That's a perk of old age. I just don't care. I have too much on my plate to worry about whether someone has an accurate assessment of who I am or what I do.

Hurt people hurt people. If I have hurt any of you in any way whatsoever, I am deeply sorry. I myself have lived through enough hurt and anguish to cover at least ten lifetimes. People who know me really well have said that I should write a book about my experiences and how I survived. That will likely never happen, because the memories are best left in the past. Unless I can draw from those experiences to help someone. Which I do, frequently.

Back to the direction this group should take. Sometimes life is indeed rainbows and lollipops. Other times it is dirt on your face and mud on your boots. Sometimes it is an ocean, where there is no life boat, and you cannot swim. I like to think that this site is a safe, open, honest gathering of beautiful souls who share some common experiences. Adults who are wired a little differently. Or a whole lot different, in my case!

At any rate, I feel compelled to say that life is what you make it. You can't lie to people and pretend everything is ok when it's not. But we've all done it. We do it when people ask us how we are, out of concern, and we tell them " I'm fine". It is a fine line to walk, between sharing your own personal truth, and wanting to encourage, to give hope, and support.

I will end this conversation by saying this about that. Some days you're the bug. Some days you're the windshield. Oh, and keep your words sweet. You may have to eat them one day!

Good morning me lovelies, and have an Ausome day!

Jump to this post

My day is much better after reading your post, @mamacita. I'm sure I speak for others as well😂 Allow yourself to feel blessed today!

REPLY
@gingerw

@mamacita My writings are being slowly collected and collated into one place, that may result in a self-published tome. I haven't decided. But I do know the title is "My Side of the Street". Why? Because I can only keep my side of the street clean, and I only know my side of the street. Now, my experiences may be similar to someone else's, and my experiences and the lessons learned may be helpful to someone else, but I've only walked in my own shoes. So as you have said, I try to be gentle in my words but also it's very truthful and how I feel. It's being authentic to me. Like you, I am at the age where what people think of me just doesn't matter to me. There is a saying at the end of my personal emails that is a quote from Dr. Seuss. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." I truly believe in that. Mamacita, you are one of a kind as we all are. But your wisdom and willingness to lead us and cheer us on is something that I really appreciate.
Ginger

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You are so right, @gingerw. We are here to cheer each other on! One great group of cheerleaders! So, let's wave our pompoms and sing the fight song for healthy happy thoughts and lives.

REPLY
@hopeful33250

You are so right, @gingerw. We are here to cheer each other on! One great group of cheerleaders! So, let's wave our pompoms and sing the fight song for healthy happy thoughts and lives.

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Teresa, I love it! I think I always envied the cheerleaders at my school!

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Me, too, @mamacita. They were always perky and fun!

REPLY
@hopeful33250

My day is much better after reading your post, @mamacita. I'm sure I speak for others as well😂 Allow yourself to feel blessed today!

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Teresa, you are such a breath of fresh air. You make people smile! I had a very laid back, blessed day. I focused on trying to be focused on what needed to be done. I think my index finger might need a splint! No, no, that's an exaggeration. A long winded way of saying I have read, re- read, and written lots of e-mails and posts today.

Folks have been so kind and supportive. Just what I would expect from Mayo Clinic Connect. Good evening,dear heart, and talk to you very soon!

Mamacita

REPLY
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