Adults On The Autism Spectrum
Maybe you were really shy as a child. Perhaps you took home a huge stack of books from the school library, read them, and returned them the next day. Or did your best friend find you crying in your closet, unable to answer the question "Why?" At any rate, your life could be traced to the Self-Help section of the local bookstore. Unfortunately, most of the books were not much help. ADHD seemed to fit, at times. Your shrink said you might be Bi-Polar, although she wasn't really certain. All you knew was that you rarely fit in, anywhere. One day at work, it hit you square in the face: I don't speak these people's language! Really, it was like you were all playing this game, and everyone knew the rules but you. You couldn't tell a joke, and you never "got" any joke your co-worker tried to tell you. People started getting annoyed with you, because you had a memory like a steel trap. They didn't appreciate it when you called them on the carpet. Who knew? This was my life, and worse. I finally aced several tests that pointed me to the answer to my questions. The Autism Spectrum. Guess what? Little kids with Autism grow up to be Adults with Autism. Diagnosed late in life? This is the place for you!
Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Autism (ASD) Support Group.
It takes time to build trust. I suppose that is why it has always been so hard for me to make real, long lasting friends. I tend to keep my guard up a bit, waiting for the other shoe to fall. But not nearly so much, the more transparent I have become. Time and circumstances have taught me that there are many levels of friendships. These days it is much more comforting to simply be grateful for the ones who have come into my life. Each one fills up a part of me that needed healing, wholeness, community. And the ones who didn't stay? Well, they taught me a lesson, as well. Don't take tomorrow for granted. We might not have it. But don't be afraid. Breathe. Drink that first cup of tea or coffee, or whatever beverage you consume first thing in the morning. Look up at the sky, and please, gentle soul...tell yourself this one thing: you are worthy. You will find your place, and you will find members of your tribe. Here, there, not all at one time, necessarily. But you will find them. And they will find you, too. Peace, until next time, @mamacitalucita
Hello @miilanna and welcome to Mayo Connect!
My name is Teresa and I am a Volunteer Mentor on Connect. I am so happy that you have joined our discussion, we are glad to have you! You definitely "fit-in" here.
Yes, as @mamasitalucita said this discussion group is for anyone on the Spectrum and I would love to have you share your experiences with this group. Please share with us some of the challenges you have faced and some of the contributions you have made as you have lived your life on the Spectrum.
At Mayo Connect we all learn from each other and I look forward to learning more from you!
Teresa
@mamasitalucita I am so glad that you have been inviting others! We have some delightful new members!
Teresa
@mamasitalucita and @rosemarya
We are better together is a favorite phrase of mine because it is so true! Connect exists because Mayo Clinic understands that "we are better together."
I formed a support group at my church last year for people dealing with chronic illnesses, we call it Living & Thriving, and "we are better together" is a way I close my emails to our group!
Teresa
@mamasitalucita Yes, it is wise to build friendships slowly - to know who to trust. The folks that we can bare our souls to should only be those in our inner circle of friendship. That is a very wise approach for those on the Spectrum as well as those who consider ourselves neurotypicals!
Teresa
@hopeful33250, that is so awesome that you started a support group at your church! You know, I feel like my life has been so much better since I have been participating in the various groups here at Mayo Clinic Connect. We are, indeed, better together. It is so important to have someone to talk to when there are physical challenges in life. Mental illness is still a stereotype. People are afraid to speak up, which puts them further into isolation. I am very grateful for Mayo Clinic Connect!
Hi there, @hopeful33250. I am trying to get the word out. We welcome everyone on the Spectrum, whether you have had a professional diagnosis, taken tests and identify strongly with the Spectrum, or maybe you have been told by a counselor that you share many traits of someone with Autism. Each person's journey toward self-discovery is different. We respect your privacy and want you to feel safe here. Everyone has a user name and is welcome to share on their own comfort level. But guess what? My own comfort level has expanded ridiculously since I became acquainted with Mayo Clinic Connect. It feels really good to be comfortable in your own skin. And if I can help just one person by listening to their story, I will be very happy.
Teresa, thank you for your kind heart. Your words are like a healing balm to the soul. You remind us that there is so much to look forward to. May we all be lifelong learners!
I agree with you, @mamasitalucita. I too am very grateful for Mayo Connect. For many people it does represent a life line, a safe way to leave their own isolated world and begin the process of sharing with others.
Even for those of us who do not live isolated lives, Connect is a way to share our experiences and gain strength. Mayo Connect is a win-win experience for us all!
Teresa
Do you know anyone who isolates, and would rather stay home than go out? Even to the mailbox? I am sure we all have that friend or family member who is quite content to do just that. For myself, I can be perfectly happy just puttering around in my house, cleaning, cooking, and talking with family. Looking back several years ago, I was facing multiple back surgeries, and movement of any kind was miserable. What I would have given to flee the house at that time! It is good to have the choice. I think we need a good mixture of both in our lives, so that we can appreciate what we have. Some days are so good I even forget I am on the Spectrum. I have a choice, every day. I can push through, and past my comfort zones. I can do what my family believes is impossible for me. Or I can listen to what my body is telling me, and just take some time. Hold the space. Rest. Just be. The choice is yours. And it is perfectly okay, whichever one you choose, because it is your choice. Your life. You are loved. You are accepted. Until next time, Mamacitalucita