1. < Depression & Anxiety

Unable to function

Posted by Brenda @bren1985, Nov 1, 2017

Hi everyone,
I'm having a lot of difficulty functioning. I sleep excessively (11-14 hours/night) and feel extremely tired throughout the day. Most of my days lately have been very empty - I haven't been doing much, at all, except sleeping and eating (and feeling guilty to eat so much - it seems like a waste since I'm not doing anything; I get these terrible cravings for carbs). I don't know if what I have is chronic fatigue syndrome, hypersomnia, or depression - or perhaps all three. I'm incredibly afraid that I have lost my ability to concentrate as I'm a graduate student (in Environmental Studies) under pressure to finish my research by April 2018; the way things are going, I don't know if I will ever get better enough to complete the research...I used to love studying (it was like therapy for me - especially because I'm studying nature, which has been very healing in the past), but I can't engage with it as I used to and that feels very painful.

I had my first episode of severe depression (which involved hospitalization) at 17 and had many more psych ward stays over the years; I'm now 32, and I really feel like my life is over in a way. The only person I have in my life, consistently, is my mother (whom I live with; she is 62). I am very grateful for her support.

I don't know whether I should try antidepressants again (I have been on more than 10, over the years). I'm very wary of them (especially of side effects) and feel they won't work anyway. Yet, I'm really not able to function and feel very stuck. I also deal with other chronic conditions (like migraine and IBS); I take a triptan for migraine, and there is a small risk of serotonin syndrome when using antidepressants with them. That's one reason I'm wary. I'm open to seeing a psychotherapist again, but it can take a lot of time and energy to find an appropriate one. In the meantime, I've been reading some CBT and mindfulness books and tried doing a bit of very simple yoga - though I'm often too tired to do much of it.

Sorry for the long post, just wanted to reach out as I feel isolated in this and I'm losing hope - especially after struggling since a relatively early age. I worry that the future will be a repeat of the past, and it terrifies me. I would appreciate any advice/insights/words of support please. Thank you so much. I'm glad this community exists.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

Mentor
Jim, Volunteer Mentor | @jimhd | Nov 15, 2017
In reply to @lilgrizz "@bren1985 hey I'm lilgriz but you can call me Serina. Boy I could talk to you..." + (show)
@lilgrizz

@bren1985 hey I'm lilgriz but you can call me Serina. Boy I could talk to you forever we seem to share a lot of the same feelings. I was diagnosed as Bipolar 1 in 1999 and have went thru hell trying to find a semi stable state in my life/head. I've lost all hope for a completely stable state of mind but semi seems to be working pretty good. I am usually manic more than depressed but I rapid cycle sometimes each day. I also have ms and my medicine for it causes depression. hahaha. Like I need any help?! But no that is not what always happens. I have the opposite reaction and get manic like really, really manic to were I may sleep 3 hours on a good night. And then this builds and builds and I crash into a huge depression which is where I am at now. I've been sleeping so much I got up the other day and ask my dad what he wanted for breakfast and he said he was fixing to go to bed that he had just ate a sandwich for supper. hahaha. Its left me really confused that is just one example. But most the time I am not this bad and I pray it will pass quickly. I don't have a therapist, I think I ran them all off. hahaha. But I love my psychiatrist. She is a wonderful and caring woman. I have taken one antidepressant for years and it has worked well for me but it has help as I take a once a month injection also and between the 2 they seem to work pretty good. Before 3 years ago I had been in the psych ward at least 30 times but I haven't been back in about 3 maybe 4 years. I understand this dark place you feel your in and for me it was very scary. I have no memory when I walk around in these confused states of mind. I probably should be in the hospital. The last couple of days I have been sleeping about 15-16 hours a day. Then get up wonder around the house lost. Half the time I don't know what day it is. But I am not freaking out yet. the episodes don't usually last that long before I shake them off. I believe your doing the right things to fight your depression and even though I don't do it now because I just had 2 back surgeries this year is exercise. Ask your doc; exercise is the best pill you can swallow. As far as finding the right antidepressant goes you have to be patient and remember that psychiatry is a lot of trial and error. But you all will figure it out. I hope you get to feeling better quickly and getting to know you better Brenda. And don't forget, we will be hear to talk to when you need someone.

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@bren1985 - I rinse my mouth with Biotene, or a generic equivalent, at bedtime, and I keep a spray bottle of it on my nightstand, and spray my tongue when I wake up from a dry mouth. It helps me.

Jim

REPLY
Mentor
John, Volunteer Mentor | @johnbishop | Nov 15, 2017
In reply to @lilgrizz "@bren1985 hey I'm lilgriz but you can call me Serina. Boy I could talk to you..." + (show)
@lilgrizz

@bren1985 hey I'm lilgriz but you can call me Serina. Boy I could talk to you forever we seem to share a lot of the same feelings. I was diagnosed as Bipolar 1 in 1999 and have went thru hell trying to find a semi stable state in my life/head. I've lost all hope for a completely stable state of mind but semi seems to be working pretty good. I am usually manic more than depressed but I rapid cycle sometimes each day. I also have ms and my medicine for it causes depression. hahaha. Like I need any help?! But no that is not what always happens. I have the opposite reaction and get manic like really, really manic to were I may sleep 3 hours on a good night. And then this builds and builds and I crash into a huge depression which is where I am at now. I've been sleeping so much I got up the other day and ask my dad what he wanted for breakfast and he said he was fixing to go to bed that he had just ate a sandwich for supper. hahaha. Its left me really confused that is just one example. But most the time I am not this bad and I pray it will pass quickly. I don't have a therapist, I think I ran them all off. hahaha. But I love my psychiatrist. She is a wonderful and caring woman. I have taken one antidepressant for years and it has worked well for me but it has help as I take a once a month injection also and between the 2 they seem to work pretty good. Before 3 years ago I had been in the psych ward at least 30 times but I haven't been back in about 3 maybe 4 years. I understand this dark place you feel your in and for me it was very scary. I have no memory when I walk around in these confused states of mind. I probably should be in the hospital. The last couple of days I have been sleeping about 15-16 hours a day. Then get up wonder around the house lost. Half the time I don't know what day it is. But I am not freaking out yet. the episodes don't usually last that long before I shake them off. I believe your doing the right things to fight your depression and even though I don't do it now because I just had 2 back surgeries this year is exercise. Ask your doc; exercise is the best pill you can swallow. As far as finding the right antidepressant goes you have to be patient and remember that psychiatry is a lot of trial and error. But you all will figure it out. I hope you get to feeling better quickly and getting to know you better Brenda. And don't forget, we will be hear to talk to when you need someone.

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Me too...Biotene mouthwash works really well for me.

REPLY
JK | @contentandwell | Nov 16, 2017
In reply to @amberpep "Hi there friend ..... first, I want to encourage you to find a really good therapist..." + (show)
@amberpep

Hi there friend ..... first, I want to encourage you to find a really good therapist ..... a PsyD .... a Psychologist. Then start to tell him or her what is going on. He may or may not send to to an MD for medication, but even if he does, would you rather feel lousy and not take anything? or would you rather feel better and be taking a med.? That's a question only you can answer.
You are not alone in feeling useless, life is over, and the sense that "why am I still here?" I'm 72, have an apartment fairly close to my 2 girls (I moved down here from a condo and town I absolutely loved to be closer to them), and while I enjoy the times I am with them, they have their own lives, and I can't expect them to cater to me. But, here I am, alone in my apartment with my 2 cats (and hopefully soon a dog), it's a low-income apartment, so a lot of the people aren't around at all during the day so for me that = no friends. I still have 2 close friends in MD, but only 1 here, and she works all the time. I feel totally useless. I know if I found a church to go to, and got involved in something there, it would help, but so far I've not had any success at that either.
So, you see, there are a lot of us out here. At your age, you've got a whole lot of life ahead of you. Take the time to do some of the things you've always wanted to do ..... I wish I would have when I was your age. I wanted so badly to hang glide, hike on the Appalachian Trail and camp in the woods overnight, go back to school, open a little business. I do like to whitewater raft, but I have not done that for awhile either. So I say, GO FOR IT, see a really good PsyD, and when you're feeling better, get out there and just DO IT! (I'm talking to myself too).
Keep in touch ... there are some wonderful and very wise people on this site, and I'm sure you'll get lots more suggestions besides mine.
abby

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@amberpep I’m not sure if I responded to this before, I see no record of it.
I totally understand your feelings about senior centers, but my sister is a youthful 73 and started going a few months ago and really enjoys it. She goes on Tuesdays for something they do on that day, and sometimes her husband goes too.
I am also funny about switching to a geriatric doctor! What do they do differently than what a regular internist does?
JK

REPLY
JK | @contentandwell | Nov 16, 2017
In reply to @jimhd "Welcome to Connect, @bren1985 I seem to go through phases of sleep binges. I have sleep..." + (show)
@jimhd

Welcome to Connect, @bren1985

I seem to go through phases of sleep binges. I have sleep apnea, and see the sleep doctor every 6 months. He usually tells me that I need to sleep less, the idea being that I'd have more energy during the day, and have better sleep. I try to stay below ten hours, but I know that I'm more alert with 9. I set my alarm, but I usually turn it off and sleep another hour. Some people set alarms and put them in a place where they have to get out of bed to turn it off. I need to do that, myself. Sometimes I will sleep for 12 hours. I just don't wake up except to go to the bathroom.

I know that excessive sleep can contribute to depression, and conversely, depression can keep a person in bed. Medications that I take at bedtime are sedating, so that probably makes me sleep longer. But the things I take, I take for a reason.

Have you had any ideas how to limit your sleep? Maybe ideas I might use? My wife only sleeps for 8 hours or less, but she won't wake me up, even if it's been 12 hours. I can get up after 7 or 8 hours to go to a doctor appointment. It's hard to figure out. Let me know if you have any ideas that work for you to cut back on the number of hours you sleep.

If depression is affecting your life, it's best to get help. Talk with your doctor about it. Maybe he'll have some suggestions.

Jim

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@jimhd Jim, I agree on all. Being in pain really does wear on you, particularly when a person has been dealing with it for as long as you have.
Anything that can give you a sense of accomplishment can help, including cleaing the bathrooms.

Enjoy Thanksgiving. How far are you from your CA relatives? Unfortunately our son who lives in Southern CA will not be home for Thanksgiving but he is coming for Christmas, and for my daughter’s wedding reception in December, so I am happy with that. I think our thanksgiving will be pretty quiet. My daughter and her fiancé will be going to his sister’s in Ma for the day at my suggestion since we will be busy getting prepared for the ceremony here on Saturday.
JK

REPLY
Mentor
Jim, Volunteer Mentor | @jimhd | Nov 18, 2017
In reply to @jimhd "Welcome to Connect, @bren1985 I seem to go through phases of sleep binges. I have sleep..." + (show)
@jimhd

Welcome to Connect, @bren1985

I seem to go through phases of sleep binges. I have sleep apnea, and see the sleep doctor every 6 months. He usually tells me that I need to sleep less, the idea being that I'd have more energy during the day, and have better sleep. I try to stay below ten hours, but I know that I'm more alert with 9. I set my alarm, but I usually turn it off and sleep another hour. Some people set alarms and put them in a place where they have to get out of bed to turn it off. I need to do that, myself. Sometimes I will sleep for 12 hours. I just don't wake up except to go to the bathroom.

I know that excessive sleep can contribute to depression, and conversely, depression can keep a person in bed. Medications that I take at bedtime are sedating, so that probably makes me sleep longer. But the things I take, I take for a reason.

Have you had any ideas how to limit your sleep? Maybe ideas I might use? My wife only sleeps for 8 hours or less, but she won't wake me up, even if it's been 12 hours. I can get up after 7 or 8 hours to go to a doctor appointment. It's hard to figure out. Let me know if you have any ideas that work for you to cut back on the number of hours you sleep.

If depression is affecting your life, it's best to get help. Talk with your doctor about it. Maybe he'll have some suggestions.

Jim

Jump to this post

@contentandwell - it's about a 13 hour drive to our daughter's, which means 2 days. I don't do 13 hour drives anymore. Her husband is stationed at the Alameda Coast Guard Station. They're coming here for Christmas. We're certainly looking forward to seeing them.

Jim

REPLY
comtesse | @comtesse | Dec 2, 2017
In reply to @comtesse "Hi Brenda! I am happy I am not alone wiith experiencing sleeping disorder as well as..." + (show)
@comtesse

Hi Brenda! I am happy I am not alone wiith experiencing sleeping disorder as well as morning anxiety. I also live in Canada in the french part (Quebec), that's why it's hard for me to rEspond to all messages ... Mornings feel like hell for me. I will see my psychiatrist next Monday to decide which medecine I should try. I am also having ect and I don't think it really helps right now. I Think the weather really doesn't help and the time of the year as well. I will try the lightbox, in case it might do something positive.

Wish I could have news from you when it's possible. I am also on the community and I feel it's good to be part of it. Please excuse my english ...

Wish you the best!

Sylvie 🙂

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Hello Brenda ! Sorry to reply to your message so late ... I feel bad since the last time I wrote to you. I saw my psychiatrist 2 times and we decided to go back to have some "ect" (electrochocs treatments) to try to get my humor back to normal. He also give me a new med "desipramine" to help my symptoms. I am working also with the lightbox .... I don't really notice anything special coming from its use but I keep on using it for a while. My mornings are still very hard on me, but the end of afternoons are sometime going so well, they are like a miracle to me.

I cannot write something else because I feel so tired.

Let me know how you are ...

Take care,
Sylvie (excuse my english)

REPLY
Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Dec 2, 2017
In reply to @comtesse "Hi Brenda! I am happy I am not alone wiith experiencing sleeping disorder as well as..." + (show)
@comtesse

Hi Brenda! I am happy I am not alone wiith experiencing sleeping disorder as well as morning anxiety. I also live in Canada in the french part (Quebec), that's why it's hard for me to rEspond to all messages ... Mornings feel like hell for me. I will see my psychiatrist next Monday to decide which medecine I should try. I am also having ect and I don't think it really helps right now. I Think the weather really doesn't help and the time of the year as well. I will try the lightbox, in case it might do something positive.

Wish I could have news from you when it's possible. I am also on the community and I feel it's good to be part of it. Please excuse my english ...

Wish you the best!

Sylvie 🙂

Jump to this post

@comtesse It is good to hear from you! Teresa

REPLY
JK | @contentandwell | Dec 2, 2017
In reply to @comtesse "Hi Brenda! I am happy I am not alone wiith experiencing sleeping disorder as well as..." + (show)
@comtesse

Hi Brenda! I am happy I am not alone wiith experiencing sleeping disorder as well as morning anxiety. I also live in Canada in the french part (Quebec), that's why it's hard for me to rEspond to all messages ... Mornings feel like hell for me. I will see my psychiatrist next Monday to decide which medecine I should try. I am also having ect and I don't think it really helps right now. I Think the weather really doesn't help and the time of the year as well. I will try the lightbox, in case it might do something positive.

Wish I could have news from you when it's possible. I am also on the community and I feel it's good to be part of it. Please excuse my english ...

Wish you the best!

Sylvie 🙂

Jump to this post

@comtesse My daughter used to use one of those the light boxes, for SAD, right? I have no idea if she still does or if she found it helpful. She is at a much better place now so maybe doesn’t need it anymore. She went through a huge amount of angst a while back.
JK

REPLY
jeannegordon4 | @jeannegordon4 | Dec 6, 2017

Hello, "unable to function" caught my eye due to this being my problem of several years past. I discovered a a "brain formula" dietary supplement called EHT from NERIUM International. I have taken this supplement for over 6 months and have been convinced that the ingredients have stimulated a part of my brain that my psychiatric RX didn't did not. Results? I'm more focused, less fatigued, and have been able to accomplish my daily activities to a level I couldn't before EHT. My functioning was even better when I doubled the dosage to 2 tablets daily. My Kaiser PCMD said this dietary supplement has been added to their list of "sanctioned" supplements. Hope this is helpful to you. Jeanne

REPLY
2 replies
jeannegordon4 | @jeannegordon4 | Dec 6, 2017
In reply to @jeannegordon4 "Hello, "unable to function" caught my eye due to this being my problem of several years..." + (show)
@jeannegordon4

Hello, "unable to function" caught my eye due to this being my problem of several years past. I discovered a a "brain formula" dietary supplement called EHT from NERIUM International. I have taken this supplement for over 6 months and have been convinced that the ingredients have stimulated a part of my brain that my psychiatric RX didn't did not. Results? I'm more focused, less fatigued, and have been able to accomplish my daily activities to a level I couldn't before EHT. My functioning was even better when I doubled the dosage to 2 tablets daily. My Kaiser PCMD said this dietary supplement has been added to their list of "sanctioned" supplements. Hope this is helpful to you. Jeanne

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ADDENDUM: FYI, I discontinued taking PROZAC and WELLBUTRIN Rxs 2 months ago to see if I could maintain psychiatric functioning improvement on EHT alone. So far, so good. I have noticed more frustration/irritability which I think is Rx withdrawal symptoms and I would rather tolerate that than continue taking so much brain function medication. My PCMD seemed to approve my decision.

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