1. < Depression & Anxiety

Long-term depression

Posted by seeker70 @seeker70, Oct 11, 2017

I have been depressed, when I think about it, since I was a kid (I"m a senior now!) I have been treated off and on with meds and minimal talk therapy, but nothing changes. In the past it has been underlying but as I grow older it is becoming more intense. People ask: 'why are you depressed? I never get depressed, just get a better attitude'. Or they don't hear my (probably passive-aggressive) cries for help. Or they say: 'what do you have to be depressed about?' Actually although I agree with these opinions to a certain extent, it does not address the problem that depression is not a 'why', not is it a 'choice'. It's almost like being gay, you just are. Maybe I should just accept it (guess that's what I have done for decades 🙂 But I don't want to. I want to feel better now. Earlier in my life I was able to enjoy things, although the depression would keep popping out. But now I seem to have trouble enjoying anything, including my own family, and it's harder and harder to 'push depression down' once it's popped. So I have longer periods of depression and sadness and sleeplessness and lonliness, an shorter periods of being able to enjoy my life. Or want something. Or look forward to anything. I will say too that I have as much to be happy about as I do to be unhappy - but as I said, it's not a 'why'. I'm looking for people to explore this idea, and to help each other begin to overcome. Or maybe it's just me and there's no one else who feels this way -- 😉 Thank you for reading all this.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

charlie75 | @charlie75 | Aug 8, 2018

It's been some time since I've entered into discussion with my family (all of you). I've suffered from mental illness (Bi-Polar 1) for 60 years, and I self-medicated for 22 years (wouldn't take medicine prescribed by Doctors because I didn't like how I was feeling, and I couldn't drink alcohol because of
the interactions), and I became an alcoholic. I found my way into AA and this was the start on a path to wellness. Of course my thinking was warped,
and I thought that alcohol was my only problem. I forgot about having other mental illnesses. It took me another 20+ years to finally seek help for my
Bi-Polar 1/Anxiety/Border Line Personality. I've learned that I'm not capable of doctoring myself and to listen to the educated therapists and Doctors.
Last year, I realized that I was depressed and it was so different from past experiences I wasn't aware of what was affecting my feelings. My Doctor
changed my medication from Zoloft to Cymbalta and during the phase out of Zoloft and replacement with Cymbala, I suffered a psychotic episode and
was admitted to a psych ward for 8 days. This was the best experience in my life.......I finally accepted my mental illnesses, and I realized that all of us
have similar empathetic feelings towards each other, but we all have a different and individual story which makes us a living miracle. I feel like acceptance was a major break through for recovery and positive growth. I pray for all of you to be relieved of your depression and painful feelings.
Charlie75

REPLY
anniegk | @anniegk | Aug 8, 2018
In reply to @lovetoall "Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you..." + (show)
@lovetoall

Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you share all of those feelings with your doctor, and make a point of asking him about the meds and their consequences. If you can, you may wish to talk with a psychological counselor other than your physician, in order to get a different perspective and some helpful tips. This is another reason depression is so difficult when it strikes us as Seniors -- it is easy for us to believe there will be no end. But do not accept that! If you attend church, spend some time with your pastor and let him help you gain some positive thoughts. If you do not attend church, get a friend or relative to introduce you to a good pastor they know. Find a hobby where you are making or designing something. One thing this will do is perk you up when you have done a good job and you are proud of the outcome. It also keeps your mind occupied and productive. I hope there is someone close to you who can listen to your circumstances and provide support. If not, look for someone -- befriend a neighbor, find a group to join, do some pleasing volunteer work if you are able. You need a distraction, so that you will not dwell on your fears. You have taken a good step by writing your thoughts here, and I hope you will continue. Please know that, although we are not acquainted, I care about you. I want you to be content for the rest of your life! God bless you always.

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Thank you for your kind words. LoveToAll. I have such a fear of drugs. I am realizing that I might be on medication for the remainder of my life. This scares me so much.

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anniegk | @anniegk | Aug 8, 2018
In reply to @farmor "Have you tied CBD oil?" + (show)
@farmor

Have you tied CBD oil?

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dianajane I also wake up with anxiet. I would love to wake up all relaxed like I use to.

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kdo0827 | @kdo0827 | Aug 8, 2018

It’s good to see you back! I’m so sorry for all you’ve gone through in life. It makes us wonder sometimes why we are given the curveballs that we get. I know that even with my strong faith I still sometimes question but then I’ve learned to ask myself why not me? Now that’s a tough one! It sounds like you’ve certainly come to a good place and for that I’m glad for you.

REPLY
kdo0827 | @kdo0827 | Aug 8, 2018
In reply to @lovetoall "Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you..." + (show)
@lovetoall

Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you share all of those feelings with your doctor, and make a point of asking him about the meds and their consequences. If you can, you may wish to talk with a psychological counselor other than your physician, in order to get a different perspective and some helpful tips. This is another reason depression is so difficult when it strikes us as Seniors -- it is easy for us to believe there will be no end. But do not accept that! If you attend church, spend some time with your pastor and let him help you gain some positive thoughts. If you do not attend church, get a friend or relative to introduce you to a good pastor they know. Find a hobby where you are making or designing something. One thing this will do is perk you up when you have done a good job and you are proud of the outcome. It also keeps your mind occupied and productive. I hope there is someone close to you who can listen to your circumstances and provide support. If not, look for someone -- befriend a neighbor, find a group to join, do some pleasing volunteer work if you are able. You need a distraction, so that you will not dwell on your fears. You have taken a good step by writing your thoughts here, and I hope you will continue. Please know that, although we are not acquainted, I care about you. I want you to be content for the rest of your life! God bless you always.

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I am 54. I am a stay at home grandma on disability. I’m married to my high school sweetie for 35 years and have 2 daughters, 2 granddaughters and an infant grandson. I take care of my mom who has dementia as well. I want so badly to get out of this depression and enjoy life.

REPLY
anniegk | @anniegk | Aug 8, 2018
In reply to @jimhd "@seeker70 - I totally connect with what you say, and I know it would be helpful..." + (show)
@jimhd

@seeker70 - I totally connect with what you say, and I know it would be helpful to me to enter a conversation with you. Trouble is, I'm part way through a cold, and I'm just not up to writing or thinking. Give me a couple of days and I'll try to remember to join in. I've been going through a month or so of increased depression, and being sick right now is the pits.

Jim

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Hi Elwoodsdad I have been treating anxiety and depression for over a year. It was getting better and than I lost my young 2 1/2 old Giant Schnauzer to Disseminated Aspergillos Fungus. It literally tore me apart. That was in February of this year and my heart is literally broken. He was 95 pounds of pure love...my Heart Dog. I will never get over that. My heart just aches and i still she tears over it. So, i understand completely how loosing a dog can do this to you. I have lost other dogs through the years that have just shattered me as well.

REPLY
lovetoall | @lovetoall | Aug 8, 2018

@charlie75 You have become a wise man! Thank you for your insights, and may God bless you always.

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Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Aug 8, 2018

@charlie75

What an honest, sincere post! Thank you for being so open and vulnerable with your Connect family. We are glad to have you in our midst.

Teresa

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Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Aug 8, 2018
In reply to @lovetoall "Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you..." + (show)
@lovetoall

Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you share all of those feelings with your doctor, and make a point of asking him about the meds and their consequences. If you can, you may wish to talk with a psychological counselor other than your physician, in order to get a different perspective and some helpful tips. This is another reason depression is so difficult when it strikes us as Seniors -- it is easy for us to believe there will be no end. But do not accept that! If you attend church, spend some time with your pastor and let him help you gain some positive thoughts. If you do not attend church, get a friend or relative to introduce you to a good pastor they know. Find a hobby where you are making or designing something. One thing this will do is perk you up when you have done a good job and you are proud of the outcome. It also keeps your mind occupied and productive. I hope there is someone close to you who can listen to your circumstances and provide support. If not, look for someone -- befriend a neighbor, find a group to join, do some pleasing volunteer work if you are able. You need a distraction, so that you will not dwell on your fears. You have taken a good step by writing your thoughts here, and I hope you will continue. Please know that, although we are not acquainted, I care about you. I want you to be content for the rest of your life! God bless you always.

Jump to this post

@anniegk

Yes, you speak for many of us who would prefer to be drug free. However, I've learned that depression and anxiety are often caused by certain missing chemicals in the brain and the meds given to deal with depression just help to make up for those missing chemicals and thereby we feel better.

I sort of compare it to an epileptic taking anti-seizure drugs or a diabetic using insulin. You are just making up for what your body lacks. For some reason, however, mental health meds carry a certain stigma that seizure meds or insulin do not have and that is so unfortunate!

Teresa

REPLY
anniegk | @anniegk | Aug 8, 2018
In reply to @lovetoall "Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you..." + (show)
@lovetoall

Dearest Annie, I am so sorry you spend your time in fear. Please make sure you share all of those feelings with your doctor, and make a point of asking him about the meds and their consequences. If you can, you may wish to talk with a psychological counselor other than your physician, in order to get a different perspective and some helpful tips. This is another reason depression is so difficult when it strikes us as Seniors -- it is easy for us to believe there will be no end. But do not accept that! If you attend church, spend some time with your pastor and let him help you gain some positive thoughts. If you do not attend church, get a friend or relative to introduce you to a good pastor they know. Find a hobby where you are making or designing something. One thing this will do is perk you up when you have done a good job and you are proud of the outcome. It also keeps your mind occupied and productive. I hope there is someone close to you who can listen to your circumstances and provide support. If not, look for someone -- befriend a neighbor, find a group to join, do some pleasing volunteer work if you are able. You need a distraction, so that you will not dwell on your fears. You have taken a good step by writing your thoughts here, and I hope you will continue. Please know that, although we are not acquainted, I care about you. I want you to be content for the rest of your life! God bless you always.

Jump to this post

That is so true. It makes you feel like a person that is weak. I am trying to learn that a person that finally accepts the fact they need meds is a strong person. It takes a lot of strength and courage to say "I need help" the thing that bothers me is relying on habit forming drugs that is sometimes necessary..

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