1. < Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI)

Adult Life after a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI)

Posted by Dawn Pereda @dawnpereda, Sep 27, 2017

Hi, My name is Dawn and I am an RN. Just over two years ago I received a work related injury. This injury has left me with a traumatic brain injury (TBI). Even though two years have passed, I still suffer with lingering tbi symptoms. I have some issues with memory. Some things I remember with no problems, other things I just don't remember and I can't explain why... I also suffer with issues related to mood dis-regulation. I can be angry at times and not understand why or end up having explosive outbursts. This has greatly impacted my life. I still work but no longer with patients. Also, this has been a huge turn around for my family. I'm no longer the mom who has everything under control. I used to work full time, manage my kids' schedules, pay household bills, and keep my house clean. Now I struggle to remember to brush my hair before leaving for work. My husband pays the bills and my kids write their schedules on a large calendar (that hangs in our dining room) so I can visually be reminded where they are and what they are doing. I am a "new" me and I never would have imagined this journey for myself.

I know there are things out there for youth that suffer from concussion/tbi, but I don't always find a lot of discussion/support for adults, like myself. I get up every day and work to live my life to its fullest. If you would like to know more about my life and journey, you can listen to a podcast that I did with my family. Its called "Terrible, Thanks For Asking". We're season 1, episode 5. Its brutally honest. If any of this rings true to your life please join this discussion with me. Thanks for your time!

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) Support Group.

Dawn Pereda | @dawnpereda | Mar 25, 2019
In reply to @micekja "Hello, my name's Jenn. I am a year and a half out from a tractor accident..." + (show)
@micekja

Hello, my name's Jenn. I am a year and a half out from a tractor accident that left me with "permanent severe brain damage." Prior to the accident I was a single mom of 3 boys. I had 3 jobs, coached my kids in baseball, football and basketball. I have no idea how i managed that. Since my injuries and man, a heck of a lot goes along with brain damage, I need help, all the time. I've had to learn to ask for help from my parents, my now boyfriend and my kids. It's been a long road but my only saving Grace is Dialectical Behavioral Therapy for the disruptive behavior, OCD, Anxiety, depression and PTSD. As for everything now, minimalism and structure are important for me to strive. I cannot work and I struggle horribly with my only achievement each day is handling the minimal responsibility I have. Sometimes it's just getting dressed. There are days where I want to go back to work so badly and there are days that prove it's not a possibility. I love my family deeply but the desire to be a normal 33 year old sucks. I have to take naps a lot but my naps are special because they are called "cognitive breaks". Gold star for taking a nap today Jenn. My memory is barely there and there is no rhyme or reason to what I remember. We just call what I can't remember the "lost files". If you are from up in the cities or don't mind going there, there is a neurologist at the U of M named Thomas Henry. He is fantastic and was able to diagnose my epilepsy and help me manage my seizures.

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Jenn,
You have had such a life changing experience. I can relate! Those naps are so important!! Thank you for sharing your docs info. Perhaps he can help others. Keep taking life one day at a time!
Dawn

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Dawn Pereda | @dawnpereda | Mar 25, 2019
In reply to @treyaj "You so clearly describe this process. I still keep believing that I will heal and be..." + (show)
@treyaj

You so clearly describe this process. I still keep believing that I will heal and be myself again. But this week was the three year anniversary of my being rear ended and seriously injured and all I seem to be doing is comparing the past to what is now. Some days are strong and moving forward, other days stuck or moving backwards. But I am constantly in awe of how I took my brain for granted! Everything was so easy, now...not so much.

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Day by day it's a new path. Keep looking forward!
Dawn

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1 reply
treyaj | @treyaj | Mar 25, 2019
In reply to @dawnpereda "So glad to hear that you're trying the singing! My deficits become much worse when I..." + (show)
@dawnpereda

So glad to hear that you're trying the singing! My deficits become much worse when I am tired. Often my body will try to tell me ahead of time that I need to take a break. This is usually in the form of a headache. When I keep pushing forward, too hard, I end up paying the price and then I have to rest. I also have issues with using the wrong word in my speech. So Annoying!! Hang in there and lets keep supporting one another!
Dawn

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My losses become worse when I am tired, hungry, and anxious too. If too much is happening I get anxious and exhausted. The anxiety makes it really difficult to rest. I just keep walking around. Walking around outside helps, if I remember to go out! "Pushing forward too hard is a problem for me too at times. We are both RNs, I think that is a nurse related behavior. When I hear myself use the wrong word, (at first I didnt even hear it) I work with immediately correcting it and relating it in someway to what I was trying to say. I correct it with emotion and emphatic energy and with the correct word. Somewhere I read that increased emotion with the correct word, reprograms the brain. It has helped slowly. Thank you Dawn for your support. You are so therapeutic! I love getting to know you!!

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1 reply
Mentor
Becky, Volunteer Mentor | @becsbuddy | Mar 25, 2019
In reply to @dawnpereda "Day by day it's a new path. Keep looking forward! Dawn" + (show)
@dawnpereda

Day by day it's a new path. Keep looking forward!
Dawn

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@dawnpereda I love your statement “day by day, it’s a new path. Keep looking forward”. If you’re OK, I might write it out and post it around my house!

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1 reply
Dawn Pereda | @dawnpereda | Mar 26, 2019
In reply to @treyaj "My losses become worse when I am tired, hungry, and anxious too. If too much is..." + (show)
@treyaj

My losses become worse when I am tired, hungry, and anxious too. If too much is happening I get anxious and exhausted. The anxiety makes it really difficult to rest. I just keep walking around. Walking around outside helps, if I remember to go out! "Pushing forward too hard is a problem for me too at times. We are both RNs, I think that is a nurse related behavior. When I hear myself use the wrong word, (at first I didnt even hear it) I work with immediately correcting it and relating it in someway to what I was trying to say. I correct it with emotion and emphatic energy and with the correct word. Somewhere I read that increased emotion with the correct word, reprograms the brain. It has helped slowly. Thank you Dawn for your support. You are so therapeutic! I love getting to know you!!

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Yes, I agree that our RN behaviors can take over at times! I appreciate your support as well. This is such a difficult process. I know some days are better, and I think "I've got this beat". And then there's other days where I feel like I've taken steps back. I just keep trying to move forward and try to stay positive. Hang in there!
Dawn

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Dawn Pereda | @dawnpereda | Mar 26, 2019
In reply to @becsbuddy "@dawnpereda I love your statement “day by day, it’s a new path. Keep looking forward”. If..." + (show)
@becsbuddy

@dawnpereda I love your statement “day by day, it’s a new path. Keep looking forward”. If you’re OK, I might write it out and post it around my house!

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You honor me! Thank you for appreciating my words. I have two teenagers and find that my words often fall of deaf ears!!!
Dawn

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etadams | @etadams | May 28, 2019

Thank you for sharing your story. I have a son that has a TBI, since the age of 15.He is now 31. He is frustrated, I am frustrated, and no one in the family wants to deal with his outburst and threats, controllable or noncontrollable. My biggest concern is where will he go when I am gone?

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4 replies
Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | May 30, 2019
In reply to @etadams "Thank you for sharing your story. I have a son that has a TBI, since the..." + (show)
@etadams

Thank you for sharing your story. I have a son that has a TBI, since the age of 15.He is now 31. He is frustrated, I am frustrated, and no one in the family wants to deal with his outburst and threats, controllable or noncontrollable. My biggest concern is where will he go when I am gone?

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Hi, @etadams, and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. So understandable you'd feel frustrated, and your son, as well.

I'd like to invite some of the other members in this discussion, like @dawnpereda @treyaj @becsbuddy @hopeful33250 @david33 @lrbrush @lakelifelady and others to offer any thoughts or suggestions related to your son's outbursts and threats and also your biggest concern of where he will go when you are gone.

What kind of living arrangement would you ideally like to see for your son, someday when you are gone, etadams?

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Dawn Pereda | @dawnpereda | May 30, 2019
In reply to @etadams "Thank you for sharing your story. I have a son that has a TBI, since the..." + (show)
@etadams

Thank you for sharing your story. I have a son that has a TBI, since the age of 15.He is now 31. He is frustrated, I am frustrated, and no one in the family wants to deal with his outburst and threats, controllable or noncontrollable. My biggest concern is where will he go when I am gone?

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Hi there and welcome!
I'm so glad you're sharing your journey with us!! You are not alone. I know that where we are located, they have group homes for men who have suffered/are living with a brain injury. These are professionals who know how to deal with those behaviors while trying to give the highest quality of life possible. Also, have you looked into any kind of an outpatient treatment situation? Those lingering symptoms can be so self defeating for the tbi sufferer, and equally as painful for the family. Treatment options are always evolving and perhaps there is something out there that could be of help. Lastly, has your son had a recent physical? The reason I mention this is that as we age or bodies change and perhaps another disease process is aggravating TBI symptoms. Just some ideas. Please continue to reach out. I hope you will find some comfort on this site. Please listen to the podcast listed in my initial posting. Perhaps it will also give you some comfort. Best to you and your son.

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Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | Jun 4, 2019
In reply to @etadams "Thank you for sharing your story. I have a son that has a TBI, since the..." + (show)
@etadams

Thank you for sharing your story. I have a son that has a TBI, since the age of 15.He is now 31. He is frustrated, I am frustrated, and no one in the family wants to deal with his outburst and threats, controllable or noncontrollable. My biggest concern is where will he go when I am gone?

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Hi, @etadams - just wanted to reach out and see how things are going this week with your son and the outbursts and threats you mentioned with his TBI?

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