Early stages alcoholic dementia, hygiene

@r24
Does your husband have any seizures? If so how often?
Jake

I know how frustrating that can be. I’ve encountered it with 2 different family members. One had Vascular dementia and the other Alz.

Is he currently still drinking?

I suppose you could try to arrange so he is safe in the shower, such as a shower chair, support, someone standing close by, etc., however, often with dementia rational thought isn’t present. Often, lack of hygiene is common with dementia. Encouragement is often ineffective. Reminders are often ignored. I found that bribing with treats sometimes worked. I’d promise ice cream, a drive in the country, favorite meal, etc. Other times, it was just begging and pleading. Unfortunately, things usually get worse. It’s admirable you are taking care of your husband. Have you read much about the progression of dementia? It’s progressive , so things get more difficult. Resistance to care increases, so the challenge increase over time. You might check out the section on this site about Caregivers of Dementia Patients. It can help with support and tips.

I would suggest immediately getting a consult with an attorney to get information and guidance on legal and financial matters. It’s crucial to get that as soon as possible. I’d also get information on what services you may be entitled to help with his care. It’s much more involved than most people realize. Good luck with everything. I hope you’ll get more input from others.

Are either of you receiving support? Either through hospital groups, social services, community mental health/addiction services, etc. It sounds like a lot to handle.

@jakedduck1
Yes. He is taking medication for them, but last month he had a big one again. It has been 5 years since one of that size, so they upped his medicine dose. He was having small ones pretty often, and they got those under control. He has another neurology appt. in February, although he doesn't want to go. He says he doesn't need it.

@ezjersey719
No. We are not receiving support. We live 35-60 miles from the nearest city. Our county has meager resources. This is a reason I am reaching out online. This is the first place I landed.

@celia16
Thank you for that honest answer. He is still drinking, although a fraction compared to 6 years ago. I have read some of what is to come, and stopped reading because, dang. I think the advice about legal and financial consultation is solid. I navigated the world of disability income and medical coverage for him. That was a delightful 3 years. But necessary. Now, it is day to day well being and safety that I am dealing with. Thank you for replying.

@r24 My brother and I are going through dementia with my mom. She has this weird psychological issue with showering. She has a lot of doctor appointments and it is a struggle every single time. Her short term memory is terrible, although she remembers things from long ago. It is so difficult and I feel for you. I do not know where you live, but there might be some services? He is too young for medicare, but is he on disability? If so, the state may have some kind of safety net that might have services, in home care that might come or something? Hang in there.

@r24 You are correct about that. Disregard my last post about a safety net, although it might be worth checking your state's website (mental health or aging and disability).

@r24 , you’ve done a great deal if you have taken care of arranging his health care coverage and legal control. I am no expert, but I’ve read that quitting the alcohol can make a big difference….although that might be very challenging.

I’d keep in mind that people who have dementia often have an aversion to water. I’ve read about it and agree. I hope you find some helpful tips. After what I have encountered as a caregiver…..I would say focus on getting outside help to come in to help. This is due to the progressive resistance to care and challenging behavior. And, explore facilities that you feel comfortable with. Best of luck with everything.

Well just is what it is i guess I don’t know..when I was actively felt alcoholic drinking half a case a beer a week. And craft beer at that..I had to make that change and the alcohol content was too much I want to lay around and do nothing, I still do that but I only drink like one or two beers now and really didn’t like the weight it puts on so no good lord I don’t do that and it’s medically unhealthy. Now I’m the opposite of those years ago drink a lot of coffee and really getting into the St.Johns wort treatment and just tried some stacker 2 swarms and want to go back to the station and try the Rapid action Xs. I know just polar opposite and highhh Strung Energyyy. It’s better but I should be in NA too though I always liked all the dopey stuff I don’t do no more..want some iceee or Molly I know..that Energy and Euphoria is great. So I know what it’s like to be recovered and tell somebody you’ve changed and just don’t do that stuff no more. It all helps and the Forums and Insomina or not but keeps me aware but yeah have to stay healthy with you’re highhh whatever it may be so Noo I don’t do that.