Talking Frankly about Living with Advanced Cancer

Are you living with advanced cancer (sometimes referred to as stage 4 or metastatic cancer)?
This discussion is a safe space where you can connect with others to talk about the realities of living with limited time. It's not easy to find people who understand what it is like. For many reasons, you may not feel comfortable talking about your thoughts and emotions with friends or family. Perhaps you are alone. Even if you are surrounded by people who support you, you may experience intense loneliness.

Connect is a place where honest conversation can safely take place. You can speak frankly and be heard without judgement. I invite you to share your reality facing death and living now.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Cancer Support Group.

@jazzjen

Thank you for the reply. I think that just talking with people on this connect will help. Are there others with this rare clear cell ovarian cancer and auto immune diseases as well? I have been soooo positive through this treatment. But I think I expected to feel good now that cancer is in remission and I don't. The lung problem keeps me down.

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Hello @jazzjen,
I also have a rare form of cancer, neuroendocrine tumors (NETs) mine is of the carcinoid variety. I have had three surgeries, 2003, 2005 and 2016. I understand what you mean when you say, "they say cancer is gone!!!! So why do I feel like it is not gone? I feel like it is still there waiting to take me down." I think of it as the "cancer cloud" and it can follow you around like a cloud if you allow it.

I take it that your lung problems are related to cancer or to the cancer treatment? Is that so? If so, it is very understandable that you would be very fatigued when you engage in regular activities of daily living, like taking a shower, cooking, etc. Without strong lung funtion, you can feel very tired, very quickly and this is normal.

My cancer and surgeries were in the upper digestive tract and so my post-surgery problems have more to do with food, digestion, concerns about absorption, etc. I am very fatigued as well.

The great thing about Connect is being able to connect with others without leaving your house and being able to sit while you do it! This is especially good when you have a low energy level.

Keep posting here on Connect. I look forward to getting to know you better.

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@jazzjen

Thank you for the reply. I think that just talking with people on this connect will help. Are there others with this rare clear cell ovarian cancer and auto immune diseases as well? I have been soooo positive through this treatment. But I think I expected to feel good now that cancer is in remission and I don't. The lung problem keeps me down.

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Hi @jazzjen, I add my welcome, too. You asked if there are others with clear cell ovarian cancer on Connect. Yes, there are. Check out this discussion in the Gynecologic Cancer group (https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/gynecologic-cancer/)
- Rare cancer: ovarian clear cell carcinoma https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/rare-cancer/

You'll find discussions about Autoimmune Diseases here: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/autoimmune-diseases/

You also mentioned pulmonary rehab. I've seen members of the Lung Health talking about their success with pulmonary rehab and even special choir and harmonica groups for people with limited lung capacity. See these discussions:
- Pulmonary Rehabilitation https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/pulmonary-rehabitlitaion/
- “Harmonica therapy” for chronic obstructive pulmonary disease https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/harmonica-therapy-for-chronic-obstructive-pulmonary-disease/

Jen, has the pulmonary PT started to help improve your lung function?

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Hello JazzJen.........my oral cancer is in remission. I have respritory issues and am on oxygen 24/7. I found it took several months to adapt to the oxygen therapy. I do feel I need more sleep or should I say naps. My sleeping pattern has definitely changed. Give yourself some time to get used to the oxygen.

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@hopeful33250

I'm glad that you posted this discussion, Colleen. As I've had three surgeries for neuroendocrine tumors, a rare form of cancer, I've found myself wanting to look positively at the future, but with a cautious-eye on the reality of three occurrences. While I keep active, and I volunteer, work and maintain friendships, the reality of cancer is always there. I find myself still searching for answers and still trying to live a normal life. It really is a different reality from my life prior to cancer.

I would love to hear from others who are living with this dilemma. How are you balancing the different feelings of optimism and the reality of a cancer diagnosis?

Teresa

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I’m heading to Mayo today in Arizona. My doctors there are wonderful.
I am having my first recurrence of Ovarian Cancer and pretty scared.
I will be getting surgery and chemo. This time I think it will be Carboplatin and Doxil .
Has anyone had that and what side effects did you have?

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Good luck. Sending positive energy. You got this!!

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@rochellewisner

I’m heading to Mayo today in Arizona. My doctors there are wonderful.
I am having my first recurrence of Ovarian Cancer and pretty scared.
I will be getting surgery and chemo. This time I think it will be Carboplatin and Doxil .
Has anyone had that and what side effects did you have?

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So glad to hear from you. Although this is difficult, you will be in good hands. I was given carboplatin in my frontline treatment, but I don't know anything about Doxil. Will your husband be with you during this upcoming appointment/surgery? You've described him as so supportive. Do let us know how everything goes for you. Is this a recent photo? You look lovely!

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@jazzjen

@jenjazz I was diagnosed in december with stage 4 rare clear cell ovarian cancer that had metastised throughout abdomin, surgery, 12 chemo treatments later. Now on oxygen 24/7. good news? they say cancer is gone!!!! So why do I feel like it is not gone? I feel like it is still there waiting to take me down.

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Sorry I didn't read your message until today. I've been very busy with family obligations which is a wonderful distraction for me. I, too, was diagnosed with clear cell about two and a half years ago. It is rare and most women you encounter on-line have HGSC. There is a group of women (of all ages with OCCC on Inspire) that is very supportive. I have done a fair amount of research on this particular histology and it is very frequently associated with endometriosis. You are fortunate in having supportive friends and family...it is very helpful. Why are you on oxygen? As for your fear of recurrence, I believe most of the women you will meet in on-line forum will express the same concern. I exercise a lot, do yoga and meditation, and surround myself by nature. And for me, learning about this rare condition has been important.

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After Chemo, my short hair, everyone seemed to like it better! Just being kind I think.
Thank you for the reply.
I’m just trying to find someone who has had the combo Carboplatin and Doxil. Or even a different combination with Carbo. Best of luck to you teal sister. R

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I had taxol with carboplatin for my frontline treatment, but I developed PN with the first round so it was quickly modified and then eliminated. With HGSC, I don't know what drugs are used (I have OCCC). Did you have germline testing as well as testing of the tumor? The treatments can be targeted with that knowledge, I believe. By the way, I think your short hair is quite flattering.

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@rochellewisner

After Chemo, my short hair, everyone seemed to like it better! Just being kind I think.
Thank you for the reply.
I’m just trying to find someone who has had the combo Carboplatin and Doxil. Or even a different combination with Carbo. Best of luck to you teal sister. R

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Hello @rochellewisner, I agree with those who say you look good in short hair. It is a great style for you!

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