1. < Depression & Anxiety
Profile picture for oodlesofeep

How do I tell my family I want to quit treatment just so I can die?

Posted by oodlesofeep @oodlesofeep, Dec 30, 2025

I have major depressive disorder and I’m ready to go. I got MS in my early twenties, it’s been 10 years. Granted, treatment is going well. But I really don’t want to continue treatment anymore. I’ve been told by my doctors that, without any treatment, I’ll have 5 years to live—maybe—but that’s what I want. I want to be done. I can’t figure out how to explain to my family that I’m stopping my treatment and accepting death when, really, treatment is working for me. I’ll admit, depression plays a huge part in it but that’s also a disease I want to be done with. I see passing from MS as a more acceptable way to go for my family than just offing myself behind their backs. But, since treatment is working, I feel like a huge POS to be even thinking about this. I’m tried of doctors, I’m tired of tests, I’m tired of infusions and I’m tired period. Any advice? Is this a more acceptable suicide?
(Please, don’t comment on here trying to change my mind. I will ignore you.)

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

Profile picture for Randy Shields
Randy Shields | @randallshields56 | Jun 23 6:20pm
In reply to @colleenyoung "@top1sgt, you're quite right that no one can tell another person what they should do or..." + (show)
Profile picture for Colleen Young, Connect Director @colleenyoung

@top1sgt, you're quite right that no one can tell another person what they should do or that you have to fight. Everyone has their own story and right to make choices. @randallshields56's comment was not directed to you, but sharing his experiences and the choices he has made.

For everyone:
As I do from time to time, I'd like to remind everyone of the Community Guidelines https://connect.mayoclinic.org/blog/about-connect/tab/community-guidelines/ In particular, I'd like to underline guidelines number 4
4. Respect all members.
- Use respectful language. Profanity, offensive language, and abusive comments are not allowed.
- Treat others with respect, even when you disagree.
- Disagreement is okay, but personal attacks are not. Personal attacks will be removed.
- Be inclusive. Do not assume others share your beliefs or want religious guidance.

The guiding priniciples of Mayo Clinic Connect create a community that is safe, supportive, inclusive, and respectful. Naturally, we only have words to communicate without the benefit of enhancing our messages with tone of voice or body language.

Jump to this post

Thank You for the reminder.

REPLY
Profile picture for jennroseclark
jennroseclark | @jennroseclark | 20 hours ago

I can understand dealing with major depression since I was about 12 now 52 diagnosed with MsS 2 years ago I fell off and quit going to any Drs infusions it been about ten months and now I truly am in pain that's incredible being not going to Drs and doing it without meds for ms I am going back to another neuro next week it just freaking hurts I get the feeling and I think if I tried to continue without pain meds or doctors I could possible do something drastic it's just exhausting I can understand and hope to hear how your journey goes

REPLY
1 reply
Profile picture for joetex
joetex | @joetex | 3 hours ago
In reply to @jennroseclark "I can understand dealing with major depression since I was about 12 now 52 diagnosed with..." + (show)
Profile picture for jennroseclark @jennroseclark

I can understand dealing with major depression since I was about 12 now 52 diagnosed with MsS 2 years ago I fell off and quit going to any Drs infusions it been about ten months and now I truly am in pain that's incredible being not going to Drs and doing it without meds for ms I am going back to another neuro next week it just freaking hurts I get the feeling and I think if I tried to continue without pain meds or doctors I could possible do something drastic it's just exhausting I can understand and hope to hear how your journey goes

Jump to this post

@jennroseclark It’s so important to control pain so it doesn’t control us. Good luck.

REPLY
Profile picture for seajaa
seajaa | @seajaa | 1 hour ago

I totally understand. Before my panic attacks were brought under control, all I wanted to do was die. I didn’t want to live like this. Luckily I found a psychiatrist that found what worked to keep them under control. I have days that are not perfect but so far no full blown panic attacks. So sorry for how you feeling, but I get it.

REPLY
Please sign in or register to post a reply.