Treatment Resistant Depression: What can I do?

@suzleigh if it wouldn't be too much to ask, would you share this TMS journey with me. I know everyone has different outcomes, but your experience with this could truly help me on my personal journey 💝

@abosier65 Starting May 1, I was provided an ‘old school’ prescription for Nortriptyline and started 2mg. On May 2, I woke up and thought, “so this is what depression free brain feels like.”
A one day positive response to an anti-depressant is unheard of, but here I am 20 days in remission.
Since I have an atypical brain, I’m being careful what happens to it — including TMS. With the support of the TMS doctor and my med manager, I’ve decided to put off TMS until such time that I feel I might need it

If someone else has TMS stories, please share!

Hi, @suzleigh - you might check out some of these Mayo Clinic Connect discussions on TMS, if you've not already:

- TMS therapy https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/tms-therapy-1/

- Side effects of TMS https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/side-effects-of-tms/

- Has Anyone Had Success with TMS Therapy? https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/has-anyone-had-success-with-tms-therapy/

Ketamine has helped my daughter tremendously. I tried it once - it helped, but it wasn't for me. The FDA approved version is Spravato, and is a nasal spray.

I suffered from insomnia from age 10 to about age 69.
I had severe anxiety and PTSD that caused me to be unable to sleep; always was on guard looking for the next dangerous or stressful event about to happen. Anticipatory anxiety was also a nightmare.

Without medications, I would literally go for nights without sleeping and then end up in an ER with panic attacks or worse. Anyone who is sleep deprived long enough will end up in an ER due to panic attacks, psychosis, or other clinical symptoms of sleep deprivation and or anxiety.

It took me 20 years to finally find what worked best for me: propranolol.
It is a heart medication that worked best for my daytime anxiety and sleep when used with hydroxyzine (an antihistamine). I have also taken both Cymbalta for more than 20 years, as well as Buspirone for the last 4 years.

This is all taken for anxiety and PTSD from physical and sexual abuses as a child. I was abused for more than 15 years then sexually assaulted as an adult twice. Therefore I have complex PTSD, severe GAD and OCD.

The other thing I HAD to do was withdraw from anxiety provoking activity and situations. I had to learn what situations I could handle, realize how much I can handle, and learn what to stop doing that provokes anxiety in myself. Even if that means to stop doing things I loved to do. Example: I may love to take long road trips, LOVE driving for hours and hours, BUT arranging trips, paying for trips, sleeping in hotels on those long trips? : they produce anxiety even if I didn't realize it until I examined situations I needed to eliminate.

Now at 70 I think I have the anxiety and PTSD all sorted out. I and am sleeping 8-9 hours a night 9 out of 10 days, and avoid anything that causes anxiety. I have also learned that there will be anxiety producing situations that cannot be avoided or situations I just really WANT to do and with those things I have learned to be in control of how much and when I face them. I keep the anxiety "doses" short so that my GAD, PTSD and OCD symptoms stay in check and I don't lose sleep.

@slarson14
Thank you for this information which might be of help to me. I will speak with my psychiatrist.
I’ve had TRD since I was 16. I am now 80!
Bless you in your journey!

@suzleigh I am absolutely overjoyed for this turn of events in your mental health journey. I prayed and prayed that you would somehow avoid TMS. I would love to walk this journey with you if you'd like. It's like we got invested in each on here. Look me up on Facebook if you'd like. I don't know if it's against the rules to tell you but whether just here or privately, I'm here for you. Love, Amy Osier

Not that I didn't have real challenges such as with the provision of basic needs of food and shelter in my life -- I came close to these in times of extreme helplessness but what I am not sure if it comes close to depression.
But maybe not -- after all, WHO defines it as loss of interest and pleasure in what we used to ENJOY: simple things like meals, sweets, hikes, climbing trees....

in other words, in my eight decades I had lots of hardships but I also had been able to enjoy those bursts of pleasure that are available to us even in times of strife as those of taste and smell of food, music over radio, and the ever changing moods and colors of seasons. I say this because more recently I came across a book, Better in Every Sense, which shows how our capacity to Sense shows us how prone we may become to mental health issues including depression.

So eating balanced food helps for health but if we did not Feel the Taste and Smell, then we stunt our ability to sense the whole-of-the-life thereby becoming more prone to depression. Other senses: how fully we see nature and listen to healing sounds of music around us (I go for classical). All these being free, and often handy, I believe I was able to keep depression at bay by enriching my life with what has been freely available to most of us.

But it does need one to sit with oneself and ask hard questions. CBT helps with many mental disorders (my brief-but-serious bout with anxiety I fixed myself) but professionals can be helpful if one isn't able to do it alone. I hope you give non-med approach a try because of meds side-effects. Good luck!

@realmom3
Thank you!
Looking for help wherever I can find it.🌺