How do you encourage adequate hydration?

@gingerw
Thank you for sharing your wisdom/experience. I have told dad that taking his meds are HIS choice, but until he decides he is not going to take them, I will be offering them to him. I want him to always feel as much in control of his life as possible. He has said that he never wants to be in pain. I invited him to discuss with his doctors what he could expect if he stops taking his meds—if he would have pain, if that is something he truly wants to consider. I also always tell him what I’m handing him, so he knows what he is taking. But as far as his deciding times to take and accessing them himself, he is sadly no longer able to manage that (eyesight loss, fine motor skills, memory, etc).

I had exactly the same situation with my husband, who has POEMS Syndrome. The disease has caused swallowing difficulties, so he also avoided drinking because it would set off problems in his throat. No explanation of the importance of hydrating from me or nurses helped. Tried everything you’ve tried and finally realized I could not keep him alive or make him keep himself alive. I told him that and said I didn’t want to spend all my time nagging him and was going to leave it up to him to decide if he wanted to help himself. Even that didn’t work until he had to go to the hospital for a blood draw and treatment. They couldn’t get enough blood and his blood pressure was so low they said he was badly dehydrated and gave him a 1000 ml saline drip. He was feeling so much better after the drip that he realized he needed more fluids and slowly, very slowly started drinking more. Plain water was often rejected, but he now drinks orange juice (I water it down) and flavored water (add a few drops of a product called Stur that comes in various fruit flavors). I also make lemonade from powder. My husband was always so tired and depressed, partially from dehydration, and now that he knows he can feel better when he is well hydrated has made a difference. I understand you can request hydration from your doctor. Someone told me they even have hydration stations in areas of California where you can just stop in for a boost. Who knew?

@ericgray
Wow—I am so sorry you have had that struggle! Yes, one of dads docs has offered to do iv hydration in office, but unfortunately his cardiologist and nephrologist are not thinking it’s a good idea because so much at one time could be too much for his heart and kidneys to process (we have been struggling to balance the hydration he received in a recent hospitalization—edema so water pills but trying not to dehydrate either….)He is suppose to try to hydrate to a certain amount each day and when he does, all seems to be so much better. I think right now it’s a mental attitude of not having these things imposed on him (it’s not new, but he has had a lot of struggles after hospitalization, and now it seems to be a “thing”—which it was beginning to be prior to hospitalization already). I have come to the same realization that I can’t nag and make life miserable for both of us. All I can do is provide variety and relaxed encouragement/reminders and hopefully good sense will prevail. It’s hard when they start sleeping so much though that then it’s either wake them up and make some excuse for doing so (let’s go here, let’s do this—which I do), for
many reasons but especially so they can be awake to drink something. It feels like pushing a rock up a hill sometimes. I am glad your husband is coming around. I know it’s hard for dad, who genuinely doesn’t feel thirsty. Must be really hard if you have swallowing issues!

And thank you so much for the response. I allow myself to have an unreasonable sense of responsibility sometimes—like if I was just more effective, etc then he would do what is best for himself. Thank you for your wisdom in relating what you came to realize—that you can help but you can’t live the other person’s life for them!