Selfharm

@merpreb Merry- I’d love to talk to a therapist but I don’t have the $!

@karen00- I hope that your next week is ten times, a million times better than this last one. I think that it's best to get your priorities in order. Is it finding a room to let, as Ginger has suggested or your financial situation?. Tackle one thing at a time. Don't over load your self. What is your top priority?

@karen00 - how are you doing today? Thinking of you.

@lisalucier Hi Lisa, thanks for thinking of me & writing! Today was a little better. I finally got some sleep last night. Night before last I never closed my eyes. I have chronic insomnia. I have tried so many meds and nothing helps! Or I sleep with unacceptable side effects.
Lisa- how are YOU?....Karen

Hi, @karen00 - about your mention of needing to re-sign in each time you try and reply to a post, I wanted to direct you to the community director, with whom you can communicate this issue and get some help, via this contact form https://connect.mayoclinic.org/contact-a-community-moderator/

There are times that self harm seems to make sense. Not parasuicidal behavior.

Hello @parus,
After reading your post, I'm not sure I understand what you mean by "self-harm behavior" versus "parasuicidal behavior." Could you explain what you see as the difference?

@parus I know what you mean - mostly. When I'm at the point of putting a suicide plan into action, it seems that I'm doing the only thing that could end my psyche-ache. It is, in my mind at least, the rational solution. What is considered irrational becomes perfectly rational in that moment.

People attribute that line of faulty thinking to various things, and all of those things are applicable to some, but one must not lump every person who is suicidal or who chooses self harm into a single mindset. We're each unique and have unique brains.

Every once in a while I forget to take my morning pills, and by 1:00, I start to feel like I'm coming down with the flu or something. Within an hour, I'm becoming less functional and usually lie down for a nap. At the same time I start feeling more depressed and my thinking becomes skewed. It happened today. After sleeping for an hour or so, I went into the bathroom and saw the cup of pills sitting there. Duh! Pretty soon I was feeling myself again. Some of those meds shouldn't be delayed or missed. I won't list them all here. I tend to be compulsively organized, so my pill bottles are lined up so that the first 5 go in the morning cup, then the next 3 go in both the morning and the night cups. The last 5 are for bedtime. I do the dispensing thing at bedtime, and put the morning pills on the sink where I (supposedly) can't miss them. Trouble is, I don't think very clearly before I have my coffee.

So, what is parasuicidal behavior? Is it an attempt that is intentionally not lethal? I've not been smart enough to know how many pills it takes to do the job. The last time I took a bunch at bedtime and I woke up the next evening, in the family room in my recliner, having no idea how I got there, or how long I'd been there. I think I probably should have woken up in the ER.

Anyway, that's how I would understand the meaning of parasuicidal. Explain it to me if I'm not quite right.

Have a pleasant Sunday.

Jim