I'm so sorry for your loss.
What God wants God gets. We can not control the outcome of something like that. Whether, you were the link or not you will never know. You might want to talk to someone about servivers grief. This is a common event. To avoid being a carrier try gargling with Listerine or water and hydrogen peroxide.- gargle, do not swallow. This will kill germs and help you to avoid getting sick.