He wants a divorce; we are both turning 70

My IRA isn't a community asset.
I didn't earn the money in it after we married, but before, years ago.

All money I have taken out of it has gone first into my checking, I had before we married, and then into our bank accounts which co-mingles it. It has been very easy to see a trail of what I spent it on: all our fun, our trips, our property taxes, our land, our house, our furnishings, etc.

Any money that stays in my IRA? I owned before marriage and is not community property.

I have kept strict records so as to easily see where any co-mingling has occurred.

His furnishings, house- which both had loans on, and car before I married him were pretty much "junk" or at most "very frugal" and very poorly maintained; stuff was growing out of the house gutters and his garage was literally falling down.

Now he is going to walk away with:
enough money to easily replace that house with something way better than the one that was falling apart around him due to his laziness; and a whole lot nicer furnishings and a NEW 2024 car.

He says won't pay me back for the 2024 car I paid cash for right out of my IRA last year. Stupid me.

He never mentioned he was unhappy until very recently.
I see - and admit - the writing on the wall. Finally.

Let me give you both some sound financial advice. If you get a divorce you both will have half of your IRA. If you have enough money in your IRA to afford a trip to Europe take the trip. Talk to your financial advisor.
If you are in good health consider yourselves fortunate. I can promise you one thing. If you get a divorce over whether you take a trip at your age you will guarantee you have money worries because you will both have half as much and no way to make any more money.
There are reasons to get a divorce and this is not one of them. Enjoy the trip.

Don’t allow him to suck you in to staying now that you have a job - manipulators are adept at that. Don’t listen to any promises or pleas - you have learned from his past actions and behaviour. A leopard cannot change his spots. As the saying goes: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me!”