Frequent Deja vu that feels real to my husband

The human brain has about 40 quadrillion connections. The miracle of life is that the brain can run all of our hardware, and also deal with reality, philosophy, and getting to work on time.
With age? the connections can break down (eg. myelin sheathing) and circuits get crossed leading to forgetfullness, personality changes, and maybe deja vu. You will have your reality, and you can share his with yours. I sincerely hope that things don't deteriorate. 🙂

@elm123 Have you already talked with your husband's doctor about this symptom? This is very frightening and I can understand if you feel frustrated wit this. You mention that he has already had short term memory problems but does not have a diagnosis.

Here is something to read about Déjà Vu from Cleveland Clinic. The key is how often your husband experiences this.

Cleveland Clinic: Déjà Vu: What it is and why it happens:

-- https://health.clevelandclinic.org/deja-vu-what-it-is-and-when-it-may-be-cause-for-concern

There could be many reasons why your husband reports this experience of "having been there before". It's possible that knowing he has short term memory problems and not remembering that this a way he compensates. Or, it could be something else. If this were my husband I would want the doctor to check this out and ask for a referral to a specialist. Many medical centers have Memory Diagnostic Centers that specialize in memory assessments.

Here is an example one clinic at Johns Hopkins in Baltimore:

-- https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/neurology-neurosurgery/specialty-areas/memory-disorders

Do you have any other information that might be helpful to share so that others can provide you with support?

My husband experiences this a lot. When we went to see a neurologist he didn’t talk to me only my husband. He said there was short term memory loss and that was all. Either of us liked him. The problem is my husband does not think there is a problem. He really believes he has already seen the shows and read the book. He gets mad if I contradict him and he doesn’t want to go back to the doctor. I have thinking it was just a part of the memory loss, though the whole thing scares me.

@elm123 I understand your fear. I'd be very worried too in your place. Do you have adult children and if yes do they notice any changes?

The Déjà Vu could be related to the memory problems however it's not possible to really know that without a full assessment. This is a difficult situation to find yourself in. Are there any other symptoms that your husband experiences besides these? Has he gotten lost going to or from familiar places? Does he have more problems getting his words out within the past year - as compared to the past? How about handling money, writing a check (I know none of us do that very often anymore), or handling finances? More irritability or changes in his mood than in the past? I'm asking these questions because these can all be related to dementia.

Since neither of you liked the neurologist and it doesn't sound like the neurologist was particularly helpful can you ask your husband's primary care provider to refer you to someone else? And if so, would husband go?

Find another neurologist who specializes in memory issues, will listen to you, will be kind to your husband, and kind to you. I've heard horror stories about neurologists who are cold, indifferent, and dismissive. Find one who's none of those things.

Yes very much like my wife at 66 now was diagnosed about 4.5 years ago with Fronremperal Dementia. She will want to watch the same movie we just saw a week or two ago. She does giving driving directions in towns she grew up in but can't remember the name of a store we were at yesterday. Doesn't remember what Menards is without a lot of explanation. Does well washing dishes and clothes by herself but does not cook hardly anymore and always wants to go out to eat. Always needs help ordering because she can't remember what anything is. Always reminds that she wants a diet soda. It's so sad dhe her this way. Always says she will not go to a care facility because I can care for her instead. It's getting more difficult each day but I keep trying. I kniw I shouldn't but sometimes I get so frustrated I raise my voice at her and feel bad later.its just so hard to figure out how she can remember some things vividly and has no clue what to ask for. But members so many things from her past. She was Scammed 6 months for $2500 worth of gift cards which we lost most of. Fortunately i caught her writing a check for $7000 and realized it before she sent it to an address with no persons name in Maryland. I was able to save a small persent of the $2500 she had already sent pictures of the cards my email and scammer sold or used them in several different states. Be careful with that type of thing. The bank closed her account and had to change to my credit union where I as conservator have to ok any transactions or checks. It's terrible that there are crooks out there that would do this to old and sick people. So all beware!!

My wife has been diagnosed with MCI for 7+ years and has significant short term memory loss and loss of exutive function (planning and organization, doing multi-step tasks) and has had prominent deja vu for the past several years, describing exactly what you have experienced with your husband. She often asks if I remember seeing a TV show (one that is "live" and not a rerun) and I just tell her I have never seen it. I sometimes tell her she is having deja vu and that I know the feeling is real to her. But it (the deja vu) is very upsetting to her.

It is very upsetting to my husband too if I even suggest he hasn’t seen the tv show we’re watching. Sometimes my husband will say - what is wrong with your memory? It used to make me mad but now I see the sad humor in it. I feel so sad that this is happening to him and there doesn’t seem to be much we can do about it. I’m learning to accept it and I try to find ways to still enjoy our lives together. It’s hard though.

It is horrible that there are people out there willing to take advantage of anyone they can. I’m so sorry this happened to you and your wife.

My mother-in-law had this. Everything was happening "just like last time ". Started around late 70s. I believe her disorder progressed into Alzheimer's because two children have it now. Never was diagnosed. Physically healthy