Aging Alone—Finding Strength and Connection

@emd52, if you have any questions about Mayo Clinic Connect, you can contact the team using this form https://connect.mayoclinic.org/contact-a-community-moderator/

See more information in the Help Center https://connect.mayoclinic.org/help-center/

The situation last evening with the 403 Forbidden was an exceptional situation however. The website went offline for about 45 minutes. The tech team has resolved the issue and you should see all responses now.

cc @sillyblone @robertwills

My understanding is that you can choose death if you have six months or less to live. A doctor has to say so. I think at 6 months away, i would be awfully hard to travel to Oregon or California...say, if you had cancer, or challenges walking. I will soon turn 80 and I was widowed suddenly (my husband was killed in an accident at 68 two weeks before his retirement). I have days where I am very tired of living. I have doted on my grandson and helped him in many ways, but at 16, he is more interested his computer than me. I haven't heard from my daughter in ten years (except one ugly note) and my son is usually "busy" I'm hanging on for my grandson as I'm the one who find enrichment programs and talks to him about his studies. I know he needs me to navigate through the pre-college applications and visits, but I'm sure tired. I don't know if I'll be here. If I am not, he may fall through the cracks on scholarships, etc. If it weren't for that, I'd have already gone to Switzerland to check out. 90% of my time is alone. My income barely suffices and I spend what I can on my grandson. This just isn't fun.

Thank you.

Thank you Colleen Young regarding the links for help with tech support...
much appreciated!
emd52

Good point, robertwills
It's important to find out the source of the problems then proceed to correct the issue.
Everything seems to be up and running...great work by the tech support team!
emd52

Yes. Even the best websites and support teams have issues from time to time.

One time though many years ago I had a connection to the internet problem. I contacted my ISP (internet service provider) who told me it was my computer. I brought my computer in to a computer repair shop for a check and they told me nothing was wrong with it. But then they said they were aware that my ISP was down! I paid over $100 and hours out of my life to learn that! After that experience I got a lot more savvy when it comes to at least learning some of the basics of computers and the internet. Downdector is a good resource when there's a possible problem with a website.

Yeah, so what's up with that??? I LOVE danish! I know I can't be the only one. It's freaking delish!

We need to get to the bottom of this anti-danish stuff. I mean I like Italian bread with butter, and donuts too with my coffee, but what's wrong with danish???

;>)

/LarryG

Returning to the original topic: Finding Strength and Connection

My life experience is: Just Keep Trying.
There's no perfect answer, and the conditions are always changing.
There are people out there.
Look for simple connections and nurture them gently when they occur.
Don't be overbearing, but don't turn away from people.
From this I've had wonderful experiences.

Even though your grandson is at an age where he can’t fully appreciate you or your efforts to assist him in having a rewarding and successful life, someday he will. You may not be around to witness it, but that’s okay. I know I wish I could go back in time and give my grandparents more attention than I did, but it doesn’t work that way. Keep up your good work!💌

@maggybird
Thank you for the honesty of your post. Please know that your vulnerability is not wasted.

First, your grandson is definitely at that age that he would be pre-occupied with a million things other than appreciating family. I look back now that I’m in my sixties, and realize how that was so very true of me! I care for my 93 year old father in my husband and I’s home and look back wondering if my mom (who was caregiver to her parents in our family home), faced similar challenges to the ones we face. I will never know, as she is now gone and I was just too pre-occupied back then to even notice! But you know, your grandson WILL (and at some level now even does) treasure the time and effort you make with him. You are an inspiration for all of us to keep working at fostering connections and feeding into others!

Second, condolences on your husband’s passing just shy of retirement. My brother (who had just turned sixty) died two weeks ago very unexpectedly—and it is surreal….
I am sad to hear that you spend so much time alone. Is there any way you could get out a bit—to church, a senior center (dad and I just toured one Friday and he is now interested in going—where for years he did not want to), the library, etc? (Preaching to myself now—as I become more and more isolated in being a caregiver.). And, I’ll just throw in, that our Lord loves and appreciates you and is always ready for fellowship time…..this is helping me a great deal right now! You are such a dedicated, loving person—thank you!