Why don’t anxiety meds work for me?

To @rick98
Cont. from previous reply: I was unable to leave the house today to do my walk around the neighborhood which I started doing a few days ago. My husband prepared food but I am too jumpy to eat. The starting does of Venlafaxine is 37.5 and when I took the first pill at 4 am, I started to feel calm but it didn’t last long, so I decided to take another Venlafaxine and once the calm feeling wore off, I took one more for a total of 112.5 instead of 37.5. I had been on Venlafaxine for more than 30 years so I thought I could reinstate easily. Basically, this medication was my last hope as nothing else worked for me. On Monday I have to get bloodwork done that is 6 months past due. I hope I will be able to leave the house. My prayers go out to you and everyone like us who is suffering.

I understand how awful it is I really do. I suffer through each day. I'm holding at .5mg 2X per day 12 hours apart of Clonezepam to see if I can get to a place in my condition where I may start tapering off very slowly over a period of a long time as it is supposed to be done to possibly avoid or reduce protracted withdrawal symptoms but no guarantees. The protracted withdrawal from what I have investigated is horrible and almost unbearable with different symptoms arising and new ones never having appeared back and forth over usually years. It's scares me to death but as things are my provider still prescribed it to me in hopes of doing a slow long taper. Abrupt changes or inconsistent use of any Benzodiazepines is not good at all please be careful. I understand exactly what you mean by what happened last night. I've done it many times. Going back on your Venlaxafine so abruptly might also be risky please discuss this with your provider. Did you taper off the Venlaxafine a while ago and were you doing okay off of it? And the Ativan did you use it regularly for a long time and then stop? Please be careful and try in any way possible to get moments to try to calm yourself down. I know it's easier said than done when the chemical imbalances rage through are nervous system. Always praying for us🙏

To @rick98
I had been on Venlafaxine for about 30 years. One day in 2024, looked at all my prescription bottles for my medical issues including type 2 diabetes and everything that goes along with it. I thought (stupid me) why don’t I eliminate one prescription. I figured I’d been ok anxiety/depression wise, so I started the taper. It went well and I was doing fine for months. Then in Sept. 2024, I started feeling bad and knew I had made a mistake. I had been off the Venlafaxine for about 8 months. Tried to restart it then but wasn’t successful. After starting and stopping many meds, I decided to start the Venlafaxine again two days ago (I took one 37.5 this morning along with one.5 Ativan. Don’t think I can handle the way I am feeling. I have been prescribed Ativan for a while and used it too regularly. I am driving my husband crazy as I keep telling him I don’t know how to get through this and beg him to help me.

To @rick98
How could I have been so stupid as to pick the Venlafaxine to discontinue knowing I needed to be on it for life. I have made so many poor decisions but this is the worst. My husband is doing the laundry right now. He has a hard time getting up and down due to his Parkinson’s. He made me something to eat earlier but I didn’t want it. I took all my prescription pills with a protein drink and finally ate the egg and toast he cooked. I know I have to eat but nothing is appealing or tastes good. It’s hard forcing yourself to eat. I used to enjoy cooking and baking but I can’t do anything now. I guess I won’t be doing my walk around the neighborhood today. I look forward to reading your replies to me and everyone else. I don’t feel so alone.

I know exactly how it is to suffer terribly each day with the condition of depression/anxiety and all the other adverse effects that go with it like inability to want to eat and serious digestive disregulation and such. Just letting you know there are many of us in a condition like what you describe somewhat desperate for solutions. I know I am desperately seeking any small aid or help I can get.
Today I walked over to a gym and signed up. It was very difficult for me. It is a completely different world as my senses are so distorted from my disregulated nervous system. The only place I seem to find any comfort is in my bed. I have to force myself each day to do something like bathe, brush my teeth, try to get some nutritious food into my system and stay hydrated. It's very difficult and I feel trapped inside my body and mind which are very sick and disregulated. When I got home I was relieved to be in my safe zone. Had lots of anxiety the entire time I went outside. I'm stuck in an awful state of mind which I feel is chemical. I think my brain is damaged from medications over my lifetime, my own indulgence in alcoholism when I was an adolescent until 26 years old when I stopped and other family abuses and traumas. I feel ruined and incapacitated because of the condition I am experiencing. I'm not happy. I'm living one minute at a time often . Apologies for expressing how bad I feel but getting it down truthfully with another sufferer is a consoling act for me. You are not alone please hang in there.🙏

To @rick98
I couldn’t make it to my therapists appointment today. It wasn’t until 3pm but I was paralyzed. My heart palpitations were wild all night and haven’t stopped and it’s 7pm Arizona time. This morning I took an Ativan which really doesn’t work anymore but I was praying it would either give me a few hours sleep or stop the palpitations but it didn’t do either. My nighttime terrors are kicking in because I know what lies ahead. My blood pressure is up even though I took my prescribed Bystolic and I took 2mg propranolol which my cardiologist forbid me to take. I didn’t eat anything until 4pm and it was only an English muffin. My husband went food shopping and brought home a prepared chicken meal. I managed to eat half. I was sick last night and my husband had to clean me up like a baby. It was humiliating because of the way I look now from the anorexic effects of the Effexor. I look at myself and just cry. Rick, I am using the name Dorothy to sign in but my real name is Claudia. Since we’ve gotten to know each other on line, I wanted you to know that. I don’t know how this nightmare will end. I know my husband is suffering greatly from seeing me go through this. I send my prayers to you. I applaud you for joining the gym. Your friend, Claudia

Yes Claudia it is Rick and I am in a very similar predicament. I am trying to overcome what I think is severe neurological damage that has me trapped and I am very frightened that I won't be able to overcome it at my age and because I am still using Clonezepam which plays a large part in having brought on further brain damage. What I will write is not me playing the victim it's simply the truth. My early childhood was extremely
abusive and I think that I had serious psychological and emotional problems in childhood and adolescence. My adolescence involved serious alcoholism which probably led to my first mental breakdown at 24. I wasn't drinking at the time and was completely confused about the devastating breakdown. I now think that due to the absence of the alcohol and a stressful environment my brain spiraled into a most serious depression probably largely due to the damage I caused it with my heavy adolescent and early adulthood alcoholism. I did completely stop and have remained stopped since 26.
I have had numerous mental breakdowns at different periods which were incredibly debilitating like the one I have now. I didn't drink through them but I was prescribed psychiatric medications that I believe caused more brain damage. Life's events as for all of us like loss of loved ones, illness, etc. can be crushing. 2016 my mother passed and I am left with an older sister who is also afflicted with many health issues and we support each other and love each other very much.
I no longer get the relief I did for years from Clonezepam; it barely helps at all. I'm experiencing the same complete loss of appetite as you mentioned. My brain chemistry and neuron damage now has me in a constant state of deep depression, severe anxiety coming from damage in my brain and severe insomnia which I don't know if I will be able to resolve with what's left in my life span. I feel doomed. I still try to do something each day but it's very difficult for me because I am so uncomfortable. I haven't slept for 5 days now. I have severe tinnitus ringing constantly and digestive problems as well as blood pressure problems because I am so disregulated in my entire body in all its systems. I can't think it away or walk it away. It's just got me completely trapped now in the grips of being overwhelmingly disregulated and I feel it will break me down and I won't survive it because my body will give out in some way. I have found no answers and I feel like I am past the point of no return and I am so sad, regretful, unhappy but I have a good heart and still have good cognitive function so I reach out to fellow sufferers not to complain but to connect to say you're not alone in your tremendous suffering. I understand and empathize because I too am in a terrible condition with constant extreme suffering. I won't ever take my own life but I can't even put into words my deep inner despair. At night while I am not sleeping I just repeat prayers over and over and hope that GOD will somehow help us all.🙏

To @rick98
Dear Rick, I am so happy that you responded to my recent post. About 30 minutes ago, I asked my husband to keep me company while I was brushing my teeth as I was having a panic attack and crying. I just kept repeating over and over that I did this to myself and was ruining our marriage. First by going off my anti depressant when I should have known better, and second when I told my doctor about how worried I was about the weight loss and extreme change in my appearance and she put my concerns on the back burner. I have always had a fear of people in authority (in particular men) but I should have confronted her and gone off the Effexor before the damage was permanent. But all I did was cry and tell her I am not a bad person — all I need is some help. I had a very troubled childhood filled with physical and emotional abuse. Due to my social anxiety, in school when we had to get in front of the class and present a current event, I almost fainted. If there was something in an upcoming class that I found frightening, I would say I was sick and stay home. I have always run away from uncomfortable situations and never faced them head on. I continue to do this. I totally understand what you are saying about not taking your life. Yesterday when I had a few hours of relief I thought to myself I am glad to be alive. I don’t want to leave my husband but I don’t want to continue to make his life miserable. You can’t imagine the grief I am putting him through. It’s 10pm Arizona time. Soon I will just lie down in bed, turn on the tv (but can’t concentrate to watch anything) and close my eyes (but no sleep) until morning and start the same process all over again. Claudia

To @rick98
The psychiatrist that I have been seeing doesn’t understand the suffering I have been experiencing. At my last appointment, I could barely walk through the door to his office and sat there the whole time with tears in my eyes and holding my face in my hands. I remember when I first told him about my extreme weight loss and he congratulated me on losing weight. Here I am showing him the devastating effects this weight loss had on my arms. He just didn’t “get it.” He is a nice person and he doesn’t want to give up on me. But I want to give up on myself.
Claudia

To @rick98
I can’t find the most recent responses from yesterday, Feb. 25. Can you please send me a message as I need to talk with you if possible.
Claudia