@oregongirl I have been known to ask someone if your legs were broke could you walk your pain off? I do the best I can and stay from people that see me as lazy. Their issue and one I no longer deal with. At 65 I realized I had thrown my entire life a way trying to please others. A waste to be sure. I also have OA, DDD in my neck and lumbar, 2 bad knees (theory here is go to the gym to build up muscle and my knees won't hurt) and I have not yet found a way to work on quads that does not put my lower back into spasms. The no pain no gain thing is overrated-my opinion. PT a while back for my knee had me in a fibro flare and I did my best trying to be compliant which resulted in being down again. As far as asking someone if they have ever had fibro-I would be seen as feeling sorry for myself. I do my best and this is all I can do. Just because a doctor tells me to do something does not mean I can follow through. Lazy has never been the type of person I am. My pain is due to depression I am told. Never has been a problem in the past and my depression is worse as there is some living I would like to do.

Parus, I totally feel like I wrote your statement. My 32 year old active DIL is fleeting around like she is has wings. Hey I remember when I was like that. Both my daughters go to the gym EVERY day. When I was working and raising kids, I never had a gym time. It is amazing how we put our family first and now they are doing well an we are falling apart. I don't remember people a generation older than us ever having the problems e do. It has to have been brought on by our food, water or doctors themselves. I refuse to listen to anyone again judging me. My kids finally came around I was going to move to an Independent living facility, but the money involved is ridiculous Most for a studio start at 2200.00 a month and in some cases food is extra as well as housekeeping etc. WOW, did I plan wrongly. Today my kids KNOW they must have at lease a million each to even be considered for that type of care when they are my age. PARUS, you live your life. Don't be afraid to ask for help and only listen to those things that you wish to listen to. If we continue to not get drugs to help us, we will have to find some other way to find comfort. This is going to be a crisis in America with the older generation. No doubt

@oregongirl, @parus I hear you both so we'll. Doing all the things you do, wish to give my son, and then my grandchildren a real grandmother. I am 70, my husband is 79 1/2. He has been told he has to retire from his 3 day a week retail job. We will have to cash out of our mobile home and move to a senior facility in a less expensive county than Silicon Valley. I desperately need some funds for housekeeping help as had to let my monthly housekeeper go. Can,t even think of beginning to pack up and find senior housing in another county or state. Never thought I,d spend my last years like this. I praise and trust God to help us find a way to keep going, refuse to "stay" depressed. After beautiful weather, we are now in a cold rainy month of March, sick with virus and so it's hard to feel productive to pack up and go...go where? One day at a time. The Lord is my strength and my shield.
And ladies, you a are blessing to me to know you are out there; sharing and caring.♥
Victorious69.

You are so right I've had it 30 years and they still have no idea why or how to treat it read my post about a new drug for pain

Victorious, you have the right attitude I started writing my post to you and the part I already have written disappeared. So, you might get part of this in another response. I sold a 3 bedroom 2 bath home with garage and sun room. FILLED with every possible thing anyone would want. I could not do this alone. My kids lived far far away. I called the church and said, come and get it and give it to people who need it. If you can sell anything, please send the money to South Africa to the Christian children who are under terrible persecution. I had a 6 month old very expensive bed. Leather couches etc. You have to understand I really did not want anything anymore I started thinking about my kids having to take time off from their jobs to move everything out and maybe goodwill. They sure don't want it. I have acute RA and live alone. I even gave the church all my artifacs from Israel and from WWII. I did put aside the things, I wanted to keep. Mostly because my husband had bought it for me. It took days. The cars were lined up all the way up our driveway. The garage was a picnic for men. When done, I had two suitcases and moved to Texas. Oh things come to mind, but for a moment. We cannot take it with us. If you can do it, do it. It is called purging. As for your house, cut the price to a quick sale and get on with life. Please let me know how it turns out. We must have our hearts on Jesus not on things.... OregonGirl

If you really need help on what to do with IT ALL, call a moving company. Have them give you a bid. Don't say anything to them about your possible plan. You will find that you are going to pay a great deal of money to just BUY YOUR THINGS BACK. I saved 6,000 and I feel really really good. Also, the Independent living does not have enough room for all you own.

I see it. Why am I afraid to ask about it. Last time I asked about pain meds I saw her tighten up and I know she was upset. Things seem to take a left turn

Great advice.

@oregongirl Sounds like we both wore our bodies out. I do not see it as you planned wrongly. As we know we cannot change the past. Things are definitely not like "The Waltons". I do not recall so many illnesses a few years back. I have opinions and best I not approach this area. I see it as things have gone too far. The fast pace of our current world. I have a small apartment and can keep up with things. Yes, I want to do more and would prefer to still be working. even volunteering is not an option. I do what I can and at times more than I should. Hope you come to a decision that is good for "you".

Parus I found I had to tell IT no tens after they worked on my shoulder ,it out my body into a fibro flare so t my be afraid to tell them what makes you hurt They work on shoulder then just ice