1. < Caregivers: Dementia

Anyone deal with Dementia AND Narcissistic personality disorder?

Posted by blue717 @blue717, Jul 18 8:18pm

I am 73 my husband is 75 with the above conditions. This is a living hell that I am serving a life sentence for. His memory is bad. He images things. He is nasty, cruel, never wrong and has no interest in anyone other than himself. I am his only caregiver, the rest of his family doesn't wish to bother with him. Is there anyone else trying to cope? The stress is unbelievable and it never stops.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.

blue717 | @blue717 | 5 days ago
In reply to @raebaby "My 80 year husband died suddenly with Parkinson's. Taking care of him was horrible. He was..." + (show)
@raebaby

My 80 year husband died suddenly with Parkinson's. Taking care of him was horrible. He was always angry with me and irrational. He died almost 5 years ago.
I finally found some peace with gel pens and coloring books or greeting cards for adults. I would color as he raged around me . I got into a sort of Zen state as the gel pens flowed. I still color as I watch TV. It keeps my mind active choosing which color to use where, blending and even planning how much area I can color before the pen runs out of ink. My mind is fine. I am 83.

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Thank you, that is a suggestion that is worth a try.

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blue717 | @blue717 | 5 days ago
In reply to @1995victoria "maybe you can get into Assisted Living, and let someone else cope with your husband. Your..." + (show)
@1995victoria

maybe you can get into Assisted Living, and let someone else cope with your husband. Your situation sounds like a living hell, you have to accept the things you cannot change (him) and change the things you can (you).....with best wishes

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Assisted Living? how many $1000's can you afford a month. Care is not covered by insurance so you either drain your savings, ( which would take about 3 months) re mortgage your house, or you deal with it. Home care? Does not qualify because the system says if he can feed himself, dress himself and take care of his personal needs alone, then he does not need help.

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blue717 | @blue717 | 5 days ago
In reply to @johnnoregon "I have early-set through declining MCI, and my wife is a narcissist. This is going to..." + (show)
@johnnoregon

I have early-set through declining MCI, and my wife is a narcissist. This is going to be very interesting when I slide into dementia (it's coming, the signs abound) and her narcissism goes into full bore.

I don't have a coping mechanism for you, unfortunately. If you want a bigger audience - much, much, bigger, then maybe go to Reddit and search for the sub "Dementia". You'll have 1000s of like-minded people in this group - I believe there are 34,000 members - which you can join, and people are posting several stories just like yours every day. You may get some helpful suggestions out of it.

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Thank you John and Best of Luck to you on your Journey!

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pamdg | @pamdg | 5 days ago

Giant yes to everything you said!!!

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katherine46 | @katherine46 | 2 days ago
In reply to @blue717 "I am not noble. I am here for financial reasons only. Your suggestion is a common..." + (show)
@blue717

I am not noble. I am here for financial reasons only. Your suggestion is a common one, but the reality of it is, stepping outside or getting an afternoon out really does little. As people who deal with a Narc know, it is a steady stream of walking on egg shells and being degraded. Even when you do get out, its always in your mind that you have to return. The Dementia is easy to deal with nut dealing with a narccistic person is a whole different world. But thank you for your thoughts.

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Hola de qué país eres

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1 reply
blue717 | @blue717 | 2 days ago
In reply to @katherine46 "Hola de qué país eres" + (show)
@katherine46

Hola de qué país eres

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USA

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