How to convey MCI to family and friends, and to your spouse.

Posted by geppetto @geppetto, Oct 23 8:36am

How do you inform family and friends her condition (MCI) and what to expect? With her, how do I convey to her when I see her going off the rails? This may include not knowing where we are at, what we are doing (going to have dinner) or other daily task. I know patience is important and the "Calvary is not coming". Just looking for additional guidance.

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jbur | @jbur | Oct 24 5:21am

"Going off the rails" - best to redirect in a kind and gentle way. Using the pronoun "we need to" elicits cooperation and a smooth transition.

judimahoney | @judimahoney | Oct 24 10:17am

My husband did not want me to announce his MCI publicly, like on Facebook, so I've been sharing with family and friends in person as I see them, and over the phone for far away folks. He initially didn't want me to tell anyone, but I countered that I need the support.

geppetto | @geppetto | Oct 24 10:20am

Thanks, I did not post on FB, or any other, and have been addressing as friends and family come around. Have not addressed the "need the support" but I'm sure that will be coming up.

Chris Trout, Volunteer Mentor | @artscaping | Oct 24 11:30am

Good morning to all of the families that find themselves responsible for the home care of a member with a diagnosis of MCI. Within the last couple of months, my family has been introduced to this diagnosis by attending sessions with a behavioral therapist. The first group flew in from California and participated in a therapy session. After receiving helpful documents and "lessons" from the therapist they had a few days to observe, analyze, and learn in real time.

The second group came from Texas and Colorado the following week to meet with the same Behavioral Therapist. This time a 5-year-old granddaughter accompanied them. Even she was observant and modified her "play time" with "TuTu".

Although complete disclosure was unnecessary, a meditation and mindfulness group was also informed. And finally, my Trio Chat group which includes two any-time helpers began to select activities for the next few chosen dates.

How would you choose a "need for support"?

Chris

gregd1956 | @gregd1956 | Oct 24 12:09pm

xxx WHAT THE HECK OF MCI? xxx
Is that “Mild Cognitive Impairment”? Why? Why did I take a few minutes to find the words of MCI in Google search? Who understand the word “MCI” and its sound of the whole written words? That’s me. Why?

xxx THAT’S ME. WHY? xxx
12 yrs ago I had a bicycle accident one block from my house. I am now a TBI member according to my brain-injury. I worked, as part of the top team, at my City’s local government. I lost 80% of my written, knowledge, understanding, one class at my master-degree, memories of my professional used, and mental/brain problems at my families.

xxx DOES FACEBOOK WORK WELL? xxx
I use FB. My writing is lousy, but most FB-Friends know of what-happened 12 years ago. I lost of (1) hearing-to-understand, (2) right good words, (3) being a decent guitarist musician, (4) reading to understand the use of local governments needs, (5) memory of my family of Christmases decades ago, (6) traveling to took care of everyone else, and on and on…

xxx TAKE CARE… xxx
Take care of others who are MCI members in your family, friend, and your professional users.

Thx,
Greg D. @greg1956

julieboggesscdp | @julieboggesscdp | Oct 24 3:04pm

Perhaps you might find this helpful. MCI is not considered dementia, but if not caused by a reversible condition, it may lead to Dementia. I love this resource because it helps to organize information about a complex situation.

Shared files

what_is_dementia (what_is_dementia.pdf)

Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | Oct 30 4:06pm

Hi all, you may also be interested in these blog posts:
- Should I Tell My Family About My MCI? https://connect.mayoclinic.org/blog/living-with-mild-cognitive-impairment-mci/newsfeed-post/should-i-tell-my-family-about-my-mci/
- Who Else Besides Family Should I Tell About My MCI?https://connect.mayoclinic.org/blog/living-with-mild-cognitive-impairment-mci/newsfeed-post/who-else-besides-family-should-i-tell-about-my-mci/
- “I Already Told You That”- When Memory Affects Communication https://connect.mayoclinic.org/blog/living-with-mild-cognitive-impairment-mci/newsfeed-post/i-already-told-you-that-when-memory-affects-communication/

@geppetto, how are you doing with telling others about MCI? What has helped? Have you been surprised by the response?

geppetto | @geppetto | Oct 31 6:21pm

In reply to @colleenyoung "Hi all, you may also be interested in these blog posts: - Should I Tell My..." + (show)

Family and close friends all know. I'm pretty blunt with it, IE, she has been diagnosed with MCI, no longer drives and may be very slow in responding to questions. We don't socialize much as she tends to be quite quiet in that environment. She also needs to be watched as has a tendency to wander off and is easily confused. Not surprised by responses although the article about "the Calvary is not coming" is very true. I try to be humorous with her as her responses are very positive.