80 lb dog still here

@civvy Ouch, this is so tough - giving up a pet is almost like the loss of a family member, so I can understand your husband's stubbornness to an extent. But I also completely understand the need for your (and his) safety.

One last thought to try - turn over ALL dog care - feeding (and purchasing/hauling food), grooming, cleaning up (including vacuuming), walking (every time, day or night) to husband alone and see how he manages. If he cannot do it all alone, then it is time for your ultimatum.

Do you think this is possible?

I sympathize with you. I might consult with an elder law attorney about their opinion. Perhaps see if there are any local ordinances that would apply or if the home owner’s insurance has any restrictions on that breed or size of dog. If there is a legal reason to rehome him, it might help your argument. But, sometimes the affected person has magical thinking and there is no reason that would suffice. My cousin used to actually believe she could live alone in her house not being able to walk, as long as her neighbors checked on her every couple of days. She didn’t get her thinking was flawed. So, he may never come around.

Do you have a signed Durable Power of Attorney? Who is technically the legal owner of the dog? It’s very difficult to live with someone who seems okay, but you know otherwise. Often, one of the first symptoms is poor judgment. It’s a shame the dog could put either or both of you in the hospital. I don’t think I’d let it go. The dog’s welfare is also at stake. Good luck with everything.

So far, I've had dogs for 43 of my 57 years. I never had kids so I understand that taking someone's dog away from them is like taking a women's baby out of her arms. If you have the money, get a dog walker that swims, hikes, my dog liked trotting beside me on my bike on a bike path. How old is the dog? What kind of dog? The dog would be tired and would require feeding and letting it out in the backyard for a quick pee or poo. If this doesn't work, find a new owner who is able to take care of the dog like the dog is the king. Ask this person if this can be done on a gradual basis so that your husband and the dog are not shocked. Introduce the new owner to your husband and tell him that he is the new dog walker girl/guy to help. She is walking the dog for us and bringing him back. Your husband should always see her bringing him back from the dog walk, run, swim, hike etc. Depending on how fast the dementia goes, your husband may not remember the dog one day. That is the day the new owner takes over. Just do it gradually and introduce the dog walker to your husband every single time. So when the time comes and your husband asks where the dog is, you can say, "Lisa just took him for a walk". Your husband will gradually forget. Have a second person there that you know and TRUST when you are interviewing potential owners. It will be good for everyone involved. Put ads up on dog sites and SPCA, anywhere there will be dog lovers. Get help From the SPCA or Animal shelter (dog pound) if you have questions. Have a friend or someone from the above mentioned help you. It is important that the dog gets a good owner because there are some people out there that are not good to animals when they say they are. Make sure you check the new owner's background and go and see where this owner lives and where the dog's new home will be. Always take a friend with you. That is my best advice coming from someone (me) whose mother is dieing of dementia. The best thing in my life were my dogs.

THANK YOU
THANK YOU
THANK YOU.

Some of this advice we can incorporate. Some we cannot but it is so helpful to get you perspective