1. < Caregivers: Dementia

Dad won't let go of driving

Posted by heartyrainbow @heartyrainbow, Oct 5 5:53pm

My dad was recently diagnosed with dementia, and his doctor told him he needs to stop driving. However, he doesn't trust doctors, and he sees nothing wrong with him driving. Mom took a couple of actions so far:
- She hid his key, but he is determined to either find the key or get a new key.
- They went to get a spare key from the dealer, but she called the dealer beforehand to explain the situation so that they don't give them the key right away.

These are just temporary solutions. He will eventually find a way. Maybe get a new key himself, or maybe even get a new car!
He has been nagging my mom so much about the car it's making my mom sick, literally.
Maybe have his license revoked and sell his car? But he might still try driving my mom's car.

Please give me some ideas on where to go from here. Thank you.

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heartyrainbow | @heartyrainbow | Oct 19 11:30pm
In reply to @4goakley "Timely discussion. My husband was advised last week by a geriatric specialist to stop driving. The..." + (show)
@4goakley

Timely discussion. My husband was advised last week by a geriatric specialist to stop driving. The very nature of this disease ( i.e. cognitive impairment) prevents the person from "understanding" the decision. He is a bit angry at the doctor but at least agrees to not drive as he does understand he will no longer be covered by insurance.
I am grateful that he is a cautious person.
Good luck to all in this situation.

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Thank you 4goakley, I'm glad to hear your husband understand safety!

REPLY
heartyrainbow | @heartyrainbow | Oct 19 11:39pm
In reply to @scottrl "A friend of mine lost her eyesight to macular degeneration. She had to quit driving. It..." + (show)
@scottrl

A friend of mine lost her eyesight to macular degeneration. She had to quit driving.

It was tough, but she had (I think) the right attitude.

When she went to the DMV to exchange her license for a state ID card, the worker asked, "Downgrading from a driver's license, huh?"

My friend replied, "No. I'm upgrading to chauffeured limousine."

Jump to this post

Love her response! We all should aim for her positivity!

REPLY
blue2 | @blue2 | Oct 20 2:22pm

I wrote this some time ago but I will suggest it again in case it helps you.
I told my husband that if he gets in a car accident, his fault or not, we will not be able to afford the outcome if they find out he was driving while knowing he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. I brought it up at an appointment with his neurologist and his neurologist was very firm on not driving (and said in our state there is a law in place for not driving with this diagnosis).

Call your insurance company and ask them if they will cover him driving knowing that he has an Alzheimer’s diagnosis.

REPLY
1 reply
heartyrainbow | @heartyrainbow | Oct 21 12:42am
In reply to @blue2 "I wrote this some time ago but I will suggest it again in case it helps..." + (show)
@blue2

I wrote this some time ago but I will suggest it again in case it helps you.
I told my husband that if he gets in a car accident, his fault or not, we will not be able to afford the outcome if they find out he was driving while knowing he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. I brought it up at an appointment with his neurologist and his neurologist was very firm on not driving (and said in our state there is a law in place for not driving with this diagnosis).

Call your insurance company and ask them if they will cover him driving knowing that he has an Alzheimer’s diagnosis.

Jump to this post

Hi blue2, thank you for the suggestion.
I am planning on explaining the consequences of my dad driving... in a very easy illustration format. Hopefully he understands.

REPLY
verol65 | @verol65 | Oct 22 6:25pm
In reply to @scottrl "A friend of mine lost her eyesight to macular degeneration. She had to quit driving. It..." + (show)
@scottrl

A friend of mine lost her eyesight to macular degeneration. She had to quit driving.

It was tough, but she had (I think) the right attitude.

When she went to the DMV to exchange her license for a state ID card, the worker asked, "Downgrading from a driver's license, huh?"

My friend replied, "No. I'm upgrading to chauffeured limousine."

Jump to this post

That's the attitude!

My dad too has macular degeneration, but it was really hard on him to give up driving, plus he's a passenger-seat driver which upsets so much my mom.

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