Preparing to Age in Place

Jim-
You've communicated so much in your post!

To stay with the grab bars: When I installed grab bars in multiple places I thought I was 15 years ahead of the possible need. In fact it was not long before my wife had multiple surgeries and months on heavy pain meds which made her wobbly. The grab bars made life at home possible.
For myself, I've had shorter episodes of bulging discs which are extremely disabling for a few days, and the grab bars were critical in enabling me to do necessary functions.

Your post gives a great holistic view of what it takes to deal with disabilities, long, medium and short term.
You show how we can name what's happening and decide where and how to focus our attentions. We need to remember every day that we live in the middle of so many miracles.
Developing this skill is highly empowering as we age in place.
If I've gained any wisdom in 75 years, this is it. And it's fun!

@edsutton I seem to remember answering this question awhile ago. Back then, my future looked bright but things have quickly made a turn.

We never know when our plans will be disrupted and mine have been hijacked by several diseases at once. The worst, Alzheimer’s dementia has thrown my future off sideways, and around the corner! Figuring out where I’m going to spend my last years is a heart wrenching decision. So is the thought of spending all my money for my care.

My faith tells me that I am in the gentle hands of my Savior, Jesus Christ. He is guiding me through this as He always has for everything. He will heal me whether it’s here or in the glorious future. Amen!

When we bought this house and relocated, in 2019, there was one condition I was adamant on: no stairs/steps. Fortunately, a previous owner had created a ramp so to speak, from driveway to front door, as he was in a wheelchair. On the other side of the porch there are two steps down that lead to front grass, but I don't have to use them. The back porch has 3 steps down, but I simply go out front door and walk around the house.

Likewise, a previous owner had installed grab bar for the tub/shower, and next to toilet. At the time of purchase we didn't need any of this, but health conditions change. Now I do. Last owner replaced a small third bedroom to create an on-suite to main bedroom, including "soaking tub" We replaced that with a low threshold shower that will accommodate a shower seat, and added grab bars on each end of enclosure. It's a game-changer, for sure!
Ginger

I agree with you, when you need these things, you are glad you have them. At my current house I put in all assisted livings features. I put a large ramp in the back, a pathway, so I can avoid steps. Also, in a 3rd bedroom I put my washer and dryer, so no basement the other part of the room is used as an office. I'm glad all these steps were taken to ensure my safety.

It’s NEVER to early about planning to age in place. If a person waits then it could be too late.
When in high school, and college I did my homework right away, so I guess I just want to get things done soon.
I have a list of caregiver places, I’ve talked to all of them, told them I’m just doing my research.
When I feel I cannot handle anything anymore, then I can call them. Most places are costly, that is why I strongly believe for homeowners doing a reverse mortgage.
I do feel sorry for renters, because if they want a roof over their head, they must always pay rent,UNLESS they have family they can live with.

I think I would prefer a human.

Good for you, doing everything BEFORE you need them.

Hi Ginger,
What about the kitchen?
I had all the upper cabinets removed, did not want to step on ladder or step stool. Cabinet man did a good job of giving me space for everything.
What I no longer used, went to charity.

@funcountess The kitchen had been redone also [it is a 1955 house!] I use the cabinets as I can reach, and on the topmost shelf, my husband is tall enough to place what he wants up there. The shelves actually can be changed, having adjustments on the sides. It is a pretty usable house for us.
Ginger

Any suggestions on how to approach a friend who is 4'9" tall and younger than I am; she does not need grab bars. We have regular meetings in at her house - she's the pres. of the organization. I need grab bars in the bathroom. She does not need grab bars. Her home is some 30 minutes from my home; simply "waiting" until I get home is not an option. Plus her home was built with very low toilets. They are no more than 12 inches, and possibly only 10 inches from the floor. There is no need for her to change toilets, but I'd much like the addition of a grab bar.