Chronic Pain members - Welcome, please introduce yourself

Thank you for your response, "jimiwho" (what shall I call you?)! I know I'm not alone. What's more disturbing is that, as much pain as I'm in, there seem to be people a lot younger than me who are suffering even more, if that's possible. I see my surgeon on Friday. He has been a God-send, but after this last surgery, which put me in worse condition, he doesn't have any answers. He is sending me to UCSF for a consult. I live in the SF Bay Area, so driving up to UCSF in downtown San Francisco is doable. I also plan to go to the Stanford Neuroscience Health Center to see if they have any ideas. Yes, I am a vet, and my former classmates and service mates are still in touch and very concerned that I may give up. I lost my baby brother to PTSD-related suicide, so I could not and would not do that to my loving family. I have people to talk to but very little distractions. It's just too painful to leave the house! I read, draw and bought a guitar to try to teach myself how to play it. I sincerely appreciate the response, my friend. As a US Army Airborne Ranger, I will NEVER QUIT. It's just not in my DNA. The fight is definitely getting tougher, so I posted on this site hoping someone could recommend a "miracle"!

@scampano3 Hi! When I had been told by ALL medical professionals locally that I shd no longer go on walks as I wd fall and it would kill me but cd SIT outside it was destructive to me. I did ask a neurologist to go over my entire spine on MRI i understood. I said NO! He told me nit to expect help in churches or from friends or library or out in nature. Really health-attuned professionsls. He did tell me there was only one thing: A Miracle! Ge said he had seen them but rarely. He pointed hard on his chest and said I had to find my miracle, inside me.

I still dont believe what he said. If I had thise ladt few yrs over again I wd have looked inside me and gone back to walking which I cant do today more than moments. I woukd recognise that jn each of ys there is a stength of which we may not be aware. Just as i gave my strengths/talents/gifts to otgers and listen to them i found partd of me a lost. I am still in pain but walk w canes and rollators and found advice from those I know believe in me as I have in them. Believe in yourself and go back in time to what gave you strength in hard times of your life. We all have that as that is how we survive. I have lived in horrible chronic pain since my 20s. Drs didnt believe how bad until they performed surgery and were shocked, “Never seen it so bad in any surgery! Dont know how you stand, walk, raise your famiky, wirk! So bad and your oain must be horrible!” I couldnt give ip who i love or what. Alternatives. Asked for help. Changed drs. Therapy. Tears. A rescued dog. Resigned i cd not live as i used to. Moved. New friends for life. As you, i lost to suicide a person closest in my life. Gave up from pains of life….and times whennit seems my only hope to stop pain I realize i cd not do that to my loved ones. They are my answers. So is finding things in nature and wanting to learn more about life, making a new friend often by accident. I fight to survive each day. I am hopeful fir you. Dig deep and look around to see if there is something lost you can find. Maybe reunite. Change again if new hobbie or interests. We all need each other whatever suffers us. Write again and tell me how I can fibd that miracle is the pain owns me. Help me too. Visit u in 2026!