Depression for years, now dealing with loss of both parents and cancer

Posted by dk005 @dk005, Jul 20, 2023

i have depression for last 20 years i am 42 now used hundreds of combo moreover lost both parrents in corona was dependent on them nd i m single nd now diagnoised with vocal cord cancer stage 1 i am shocked god can give this much punishment to someone anyway regarding antidepressents i can definitly say lorezapam helped me a lot taking 2 mg twice i think more than recommended dose and i was raking imipramine 10 mg 2 times after loss of parrents it was 10 mg *4 nd i realised my weight increased by 7 kg real culprit of weight gain but for burning on chest and burning on skin nd tingling on legs i have to take them no option o have left as taking escitolpram duloxetine and many more still i remember doc dave me mirnite 7.5 mg content is mirtazapine was taking for burning nd it was cured but again severe weight gain so i stoped as then i was 32 but now i dont care if you are comfertable with weight gain you can ask your doctor for mirtazapine dont take without his content …..good luck tc

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@dk005, I can see that you are familiar with managing long-term depression having lived with it for over 20 years. But now that careful management of depression is being challenged by serious events in your life like a world pandemic, loss of both your parents, loss of your financial and emotional support, and a diagnosis of cancer. That’s a lot to handle.

It sounds like you are in the care of a health care professional who has been helping you cope and adjusting your medications. Do you also speak with a therapist regularly?

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@colleenyoung

@dk005, I can see that you are familiar with managing long-term depression having lived with it for over 20 years. But now that careful management of depression is being challenged by serious events in your life like a world pandemic, loss of both your parents, loss of your financial and emotional support, and a diagnosis of cancer. That’s a lot to handle.

It sounds like you are in the care of a health care professional who has been helping you cope and adjusting your medications. Do you also speak with a therapist regularly?

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@colleenyoung thank you so much yes i was familiar with all kind of antidepressants but most difficult for me is what i was getting emmotional support of my mom and dad... both went severe shock increased my tobbaco and antidepressants at fullest and caught in first stage luckily its early caught but as am singler all doctors are there for me but at home no one is left for motivation thats big problem one married sister who comes weekly only... yes big big roller coaster ahead ...thinking to hire some servent for 24 hours living in India thank you so much for your support.....

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@dk005 The loss of both of your parents is so difficult especially since, as your wrote, your father and mother were your biggest emotional support. Even though you are very familiar with the feelings and thoughts that go with depression the added sadness and stress of the loss of your beloved parents makes it all that more difficult. I think you wrote that you live alone now? And that you have a sister who is married? Do you have other family who live nearby? Is it possible to get out of your house and visit with your family in their houses? I know that for me when I feel depressed getting out of the house for a walk and seeing other people, even if I don’t know them, is helpful to me.

Who can you talk with about how you are feeling?

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@dk005

@colleenyoung thank you so much yes i was familiar with all kind of antidepressants but most difficult for me is what i was getting emmotional support of my mom and dad... both went severe shock increased my tobbaco and antidepressants at fullest and caught in first stage luckily its early caught but as am singler all doctors are there for me but at home no one is left for motivation thats big problem one married sister who comes weekly only... yes big big roller coaster ahead ...thinking to hire some servent for 24 hours living in India thank you so much for your support.....

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@dk005 It is difficult when a support system is suddenly not there for you, isn't it? Sometimes, meeting up with people who share the same pastimes or hobbies can help you feel less alone. Also, being able to exercise in fresh air can be beneficial.

What types of work have you done in your life that you can return to? Is that possible to look into?
Ginger

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@naturegirl5

@dk005 The loss of both of your parents is so difficult especially since, as your wrote, your father and mother were your biggest emotional support. Even though you are very familiar with the feelings and thoughts that go with depression the added sadness and stress of the loss of your beloved parents makes it all that more difficult. I think you wrote that you live alone now? And that you have a sister who is married? Do you have other family who live nearby? Is it possible to get out of your house and visit with your family in their houses? I know that for me when I feel depressed getting out of the house for a walk and seeing other people, even if I don’t know them, is helpful to me.

Who can you talk with about how you are feeling?

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@naturegirl5 @gingerw
yes i have 2 friends living near by but they are married so somewhat hesitate to go but they come to my home randomly and i have my fathers two sisters who is living in my city they also tell me to come but after this cancer news i dont know i lost all enery and sitting in my bedroom alone....i was doing share trading before at home my home was fully live with mom dad and part time servent they push me to go out home now there is no one... but thanks for your support here people are so good... and i wad doing acting on instagram reels as it was my passion but left and no more interest no energy left.. my phychristist increased my imipramine and one ssri somewhat good ... actually had to left tobbaco so mood is low rightnow .. financially my dad was very stable so it is not a problem so thinking of hiring some one honest person yup i will try to do something once my tobbaco withdrwal stops...thank you so much again....

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@dk005

@naturegirl5 @gingerw
yes i have 2 friends living near by but they are married so somewhat hesitate to go but they come to my home randomly and i have my fathers two sisters who is living in my city they also tell me to come but after this cancer news i dont know i lost all enery and sitting in my bedroom alone....i was doing share trading before at home my home was fully live with mom dad and part time servent they push me to go out home now there is no one... but thanks for your support here people are so good... and i wad doing acting on instagram reels as it was my passion but left and no more interest no energy left.. my phychristist increased my imipramine and one ssri somewhat good ... actually had to left tobbaco so mood is low rightnow .. financially my dad was very stable so it is not a problem so thinking of hiring some one honest person yup i will try to do something once my tobbaco withdrwal stops...thank you so much again....

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@dk005 Sometimes we need to push ourselves to do things we know will be good for us, even when we don't feel like it. Afterwards, we feel better. I know that is how it is for me! Your friends wouldn't tell you to come to their house if they didn't want you there. There is a phrase of "getting out of our own way", and removing the blocks we place to stop us. It's not always easy, but has its rewards.

Reaching out to your friends, and aunts, will be a good thing. You seem to be worried about the diagnosis and talking to someone in person will feel good. What have the doctors told you about the possible cancer?
Ginger

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@gingerw

@dk005 Sometimes we need to push ourselves to do things we know will be good for us, even when we don't feel like it. Afterwards, we feel better. I know that is how it is for me! Your friends wouldn't tell you to come to their house if they didn't want you there. There is a phrase of "getting out of our own way", and removing the blocks we place to stop us. It's not always easy, but has its rewards.

Reaching out to your friends, and aunts, will be a good thing. You seem to be worried about the diagnosis and talking to someone in person will feel good. What have the doctors told you about the possible cancer?
Ginger

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@gingerw yes you are absolutely right now after loss of parrents definately i will have to push my self again and againn i will surel..y do it .even i will tell my sister to call me alternate day to recall and remind me you go out of home or not ..acualy my doctor told me rightnow i have so much precancerious changes and having fast growing dangerous leukoplakia forgot name due to oversmoke and tobbaco so he told eventually it will lead to cancer its just matter of time its like hanging sword...now dont know when just fearing in suffeering my dads hand would not be there so having fear all time of losing voice that feeding tube and breething problem...omg @naturegirl5

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@dk005

@gingerw yes you are absolutely right now after loss of parrents definately i will have to push my self again and againn i will surel..y do it .even i will tell my sister to call me alternate day to recall and remind me you go out of home or not ..acualy my doctor told me rightnow i have so much precancerious changes and having fast growing dangerous leukoplakia forgot name due to oversmoke and tobbaco so he told eventually it will lead to cancer its just matter of time its like hanging sword...now dont know when just fearing in suffeering my dads hand would not be there so having fear all time of losing voice that feeding tube and breething problem...omg @naturegirl5

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@dk005 Perhaps you can look at it like this: Recall your dad and mother being there with you, and how they would gently guide you/support you. Even think about what they would say to you. And you might find that indeed they are in your heart and mind! They do not always "just leave" you, when you can feel their care and words. I know that is how it has been with my parents, who I lost in 1996 and 2012, myself.

Following your doctors' advice and concern about tobacco use and alcohol will help you, and may make your health less of a struggle. It won't be easy, but looking forward to a less severe situation is what you need to focus on. Doing all you can to help yourself, and remembering your parents' guidance, reaching out to your sister and aunts, will be a challenge. Accept it!
Sending you gentle hugs,
Ginger

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@gingerw

@dk005 Perhaps you can look at it like this: Recall your dad and mother being there with you, and how they would gently guide you/support you. Even think about what they would say to you. And you might find that indeed they are in your heart and mind! They do not always "just leave" you, when you can feel their care and words. I know that is how it has been with my parents, who I lost in 1996 and 2012, myself.

Following your doctors' advice and concern about tobacco use and alcohol will help you, and may make your health less of a struggle. It won't be easy, but looking forward to a less severe situation is what you need to focus on. Doing all you can to help yourself, and remembering your parents' guidance, reaching out to your sister and aunts, will be a challenge. Accept it!
Sending you gentle hugs,
Ginger

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yes you are right yup i so many times tihink like ;that way about my parrents i got it exactkt what you are saying...i have quit tobbaco ciggaarate which is in my hand yes i will try to create less severe situation as it caught early thank you so much for all your support ....

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