Ugh my hair

I feel like puking. I'm reading an article from Medical News Today on hair regrowth following chemotherapy. It's so discouraging. It's talks about slow growth, thinner growth, hair that even after the cancer growth is thinner than before and may not ever look or feel like it did before. I'm so glad I didn't see this article before I lost my hair

My bio hair is stick straight and very fine but full and I wear it blonde. I had plenty of fine hair that I was pretty good at working with. I mostly liked my hair.

I wore my hair permed though the 80s into the 90s. Sometimes really short other times shoulder length. I call that the poodle years.

My hair grows slow and has never been much longer than my shoulders. I consider myself a "short hair dog." I always envy the beautiful long "Farrah" like hair my cousin had, but I could style mine like Olivia Newton John. In 1996 I made a really hard decision to cut my hair short similar to Princesses Diana's. It was a hard decision because I knew it could be years to be shoulder length again. Over the last decade I wore it shoulder length.

I was sick about loosing my hair. I wanted to use cold capping while receiving chemotherapy. The care manager sent me a message that I felt was cold and uncaring when I requested the order for cold capping. She said the doctor will sign it but you be wasting your money it never works. I went to PubMed and I found an article discussing Carboplatin and TAXOL combo and cold capping. All patients stopped cold capping after the second cycle because it didn't stop the alopecia. So I decided to embrace wigs.

I'm in a hair loss sister community on Facebook. Most the women have hair loss do to hormonal disorders and autoimmune alopecia, but some women's hair didn't fully return after chemotherapy.

I've been really doing a great job taking care of my body through chemotherapy. Hopefully my hair will return better than before. I can only hope right?

Denise
Picture from 1999. Zoe and I in Guangzhou, China