Today is Day 1

My wife and I learned of her breast cancer a month ago. It is tearing me apart. I have found opening up on this forum very soothing. It has been my screaming pillow.

My wife has a saying that I love, when ever someone asks us if there is anything they can do. She says, “pray for me if you are a believer, send me warm thoughts if your not.” I am a believer, so I’ll pray for you right after I send this post.

I’m sure sleep will be tough for you tonight but try to have sweet dreams. One thing I have learned about breast cancer, your not alone. @)))—}—}— flower.

HI there. Wow you and your spouse have a lot going on. So sorry.

It's good to be aware that lobular has some characteristics different from ductal. Here is a good organization to keep in touch with: https://lobularbreastcancer.org/ I would try to find an oncologist who specializes in lobular. If close to Boston, Oscar Metzger is a good choice
https://www.dana-farber.org/find-a-doctor/otto-metzger/

You are in the hardest part of this whole thing. Once you have a treatment plan, you just do it. You will get pathology results and if your cancer is responsive to estrogen (ER+) and HER2-, you will have a test called an Oncotype that tells you whether you can benefit from chemo. If not, you may do hormonal meds, a pill a day for 5+ years.

Lobular is harder to image so I believe more have double mastectomies for that reason. My cancer was mixed lobular and ductal and I went that route.

Keep us posted!

I beg to disagree with your statement that more women diagnosed with lobular have mastectomies. This is not true.

A lot of variables come into play when discussing treatment plans, regardless of the lobular diagnosis.

Lobular is not always hard to detect. It’s not usually found in the other breast and there are many many of us who’ve chosen to have lumpectomies. ♥️

I have LC stage 1. I will have a lumpectomy, not mastectomy. I think our chose depends on several factors and it is individual. I trust my doctor recommendation.

Thank you for your note. I'm sorry that you folks are going through this. I love that saying and I'm going to save it. I was exhausted after work and slept well but today my insides feel like a trembling bowl of jelly. Thank you so much for sharing and for the flower.

Thank you for your note. I moved from Cape Cod to North Carolina 16 years ago. They do fabulous work at Dana Farber. I have work to do here to get the best treatment. First day of my journey.

Thank you very much for your hug and note.

Thank you for your response. I have an appointment with a surgeon in a little more than a week. I'm going to ask around town about her. I love my husband's oncologist and I don't know this surgeon that I have been referred to. I will be investigating everything. I'm already happy to have joined this group.

Like you, I love my husbands oncologist! When we need a referral we ask him who we should see. He is so gracious in always recommending the “A” team for us.
Dana Farber is a great place to be. I would think you are in good hands.
I remember it like it was yesterday, when I was waiting for the next step. Being terrified of what comes next. I am so sorry you are going through this. Once there is a plan in place and you have chosen your treatments, you should feel more empowered. Meanwhile, when I am in waiting mode, I like to take in a deep breath or two and blow them all the way out as forcefully as I can. This refocusing of my attention allows me to stop and be mindful of the moment.
There are quite a few conversations here with folks with lobular cancer, I would encourage you to visit them and connect with others there too. Lobular does have some differences and some similarities with ductal.
I am going to send prayers in the air for you, and would like to welcome you to the best club you never wanted to join.
Are you making a list of questions for your doctor yet?

Dear God, if I’m honest, there are times when I feel deep pain. It’s hard to continue. There are no smiles. I don’t feel joy. Please help me trust You when it’s hard. Help me believe that, with time, You can make something beautiful of my life. I also thank God for these skilled men and women who often are under great pressure to do what they must do and often in a short amount of time, so give them the ability to do what You have called them to do, and as always, I ask for these things in the name of and for the glory of the great Son of God, Jesus Christ, in Whose name I pray, Amen

P.S. @gpigford I hope you both watch the video I posted Flat & Proud. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Obav_UzivxA