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Mentor

Downsizing, To Move or Not to Move? That is the Question

Posted by Rosemary, Volunteer Mentor @rosemarya, Apr 12, 2020

At some point as we age, we will have to make a decision about leaving our homes and downsizing. Maybe in our own town or to another town. Maybe to smaller home, condo, apartment, or assisted living/senior community.

When the time comes to downsize, seniors can struggle with a multitude of emotional, physical, and financial challenges.

How do you make an informed decision about when to downsize?
What tips do you have to share?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Aging Well Support Group.

ess77 - Elizabeth | @ess77 | Dec 17, 2020

Please send him my way! I don't have a handyman at this point. They've moved, gotten older, one stole drugs from me! I've had a couple of good fellows, but been without not for a couple of years. It's hard to find a really good person who knows his stuff.

REPLY
Mentor
Sue, Volunteer Mentor | @sueinmn | Jan 2, 2021

Well, I'll be doubling down on my efforts to clear out her after spending 3 days with my daughter - as sure as I'm sitting here, I know she owns more stuff that I do after 37 years in this house - and we moved her there only 3 1/2 years ago.

She's moving to a temporary 1 BR flat while she searches for a house near her sister and us - so most of her possessions with go to storage.

On the positive side, she got rid of most of her textbooks, no longer wanted furniture, extra pots and pans, old camping equipment, etc. Dad took all of her old computers home to "wipe" and pass the still-working ones on to charity and the others to recycling.

Tomorrow we will go through her 100 plus pairs of shoes and keep only the still-good ones. Might as well put the worn out ones in the apt dumpster.

I located all (I think) the boxes, bags and totes of paperwork she had stashed and brought them here for her to go through between calls on her tele-health job. My next task for the day is to make her a clear chart of what to keep/what to toss (she has severe ADD) then give her a small stack at a time. I'm thinking about suggesting this as her mailing address, and once a week she can come and go through it right here until she develops a habit.

We will spend the winter "curating" her belongings a couple boxes at a time. At 41 she still has her T's and sweatshirts from HS, tech school & college, and even some jeans that old. Plus uniforms from RN, paramedic, 911 & police jobs... Then there's all the yarn, clay tools, paints, fabrics,at least she got rid of the 100 pounds of clay she had last time. And enough blankets, sheets and towels to start a B&B! Plus pet supplies for a herd of 20, even though she only has 3 guinea pigs.

She has about 150 plants (now living on a huge rack in my family room - she will be taking care of them herself.)

So, to try to set an example, I have begin pulling out my fabric boxes one at a time, sorting what I will never use and designating it for quilters, charity sewers, or the Textile Center. Looks like I'll be keeping about half and recycling half. All the notions and organized were already done 2 years ago, and I have been very disciplined about only buying supplies as I run out. This will make it a lot easier to move everything in the Spring to paint and do the floor.

Sue

REPLY
2 replies
ess77 - Elizabeth | @ess77 | Jan 2, 2021
In reply to @sueinmn "Well, I'll be doubling down on my efforts to clear out her after spending 3 days..." + (show)
@sueinmn

Well, I'll be doubling down on my efforts to clear out her after spending 3 days with my daughter - as sure as I'm sitting here, I know she owns more stuff that I do after 37 years in this house - and we moved her there only 3 1/2 years ago.

She's moving to a temporary 1 BR flat while she searches for a house near her sister and us - so most of her possessions with go to storage.

On the positive side, she got rid of most of her textbooks, no longer wanted furniture, extra pots and pans, old camping equipment, etc. Dad took all of her old computers home to "wipe" and pass the still-working ones on to charity and the others to recycling.

Tomorrow we will go through her 100 plus pairs of shoes and keep only the still-good ones. Might as well put the worn out ones in the apt dumpster.

I located all (I think) the boxes, bags and totes of paperwork she had stashed and brought them here for her to go through between calls on her tele-health job. My next task for the day is to make her a clear chart of what to keep/what to toss (she has severe ADD) then give her a small stack at a time. I'm thinking about suggesting this as her mailing address, and once a week she can come and go through it right here until she develops a habit.

We will spend the winter "curating" her belongings a couple boxes at a time. At 41 she still has her T's and sweatshirts from HS, tech school & college, and even some jeans that old. Plus uniforms from RN, paramedic, 911 & police jobs... Then there's all the yarn, clay tools, paints, fabrics,at least she got rid of the 100 pounds of clay she had last time. And enough blankets, sheets and towels to start a B&B! Plus pet supplies for a herd of 20, even though she only has 3 guinea pigs.

She has about 150 plants (now living on a huge rack in my family room - she will be taking care of them herself.)

So, to try to set an example, I have begin pulling out my fabric boxes one at a time, sorting what I will never use and designating it for quilters, charity sewers, or the Textile Center. Looks like I'll be keeping about half and recycling half. All the notions and organized were already done 2 years ago, and I have been very disciplined about only buying supplies as I run out. This will make it a lot easier to move everything in the Spring to paint and do the floor.

Sue

Jump to this post

Well, Sue...look at you! When are you heading to Florida? You are the help I need to finish my clearing out, downsizing and the renovating. I need someone with your organization skills to help me get more accomplished. But, I can't keep up with someone working too much and I do need to be part of this project! Sounds like you've actually done a lot yourself, for yourself. Congratulations to you both. Blessings in 2021!!!! Elizabeth

REPLY
1 reply
Sundance(RB) | @sundance6 | Jan 2, 2021
In reply to @sueinmn "Well, I'll be doubling down on my efforts to clear out her after spending 3 days..." + (show)
@sueinmn

Well, I'll be doubling down on my efforts to clear out her after spending 3 days with my daughter - as sure as I'm sitting here, I know she owns more stuff that I do after 37 years in this house - and we moved her there only 3 1/2 years ago.

She's moving to a temporary 1 BR flat while she searches for a house near her sister and us - so most of her possessions with go to storage.

On the positive side, she got rid of most of her textbooks, no longer wanted furniture, extra pots and pans, old camping equipment, etc. Dad took all of her old computers home to "wipe" and pass the still-working ones on to charity and the others to recycling.

Tomorrow we will go through her 100 plus pairs of shoes and keep only the still-good ones. Might as well put the worn out ones in the apt dumpster.

I located all (I think) the boxes, bags and totes of paperwork she had stashed and brought them here for her to go through between calls on her tele-health job. My next task for the day is to make her a clear chart of what to keep/what to toss (she has severe ADD) then give her a small stack at a time. I'm thinking about suggesting this as her mailing address, and once a week she can come and go through it right here until she develops a habit.

We will spend the winter "curating" her belongings a couple boxes at a time. At 41 she still has her T's and sweatshirts from HS, tech school & college, and even some jeans that old. Plus uniforms from RN, paramedic, 911 & police jobs... Then there's all the yarn, clay tools, paints, fabrics,at least she got rid of the 100 pounds of clay she had last time. And enough blankets, sheets and towels to start a B&B! Plus pet supplies for a herd of 20, even though she only has 3 guinea pigs.

She has about 150 plants (now living on a huge rack in my family room - she will be taking care of them herself.)

So, to try to set an example, I have begin pulling out my fabric boxes one at a time, sorting what I will never use and designating it for quilters, charity sewers, or the Textile Center. Looks like I'll be keeping about half and recycling half. All the notions and organized were already done 2 years ago, and I have been very disciplined about only buying supplies as I run out. This will make it a lot easier to move everything in the Spring to paint and do the floor.

Sue

Jump to this post

Sue, Bless You! I'm attempting to do the same in my house after living in it for 26 years. Moving to be closer to my family in the NW corner of New Mexico!
I keep trying to "WIGGLY MY NOSE" AND IT WILL ALL BE DONE!
SUNDANCE(RB)

REPLY
Mentor
Sue, Volunteer Mentor | @sueinmn | Jan 3, 2021
In reply to @ess77 "Well, Sue...look at you! When are you heading to Florida? You are the help I need..." + (show)
@ess77

Well, Sue...look at you! When are you heading to Florida? You are the help I need to finish my clearing out, downsizing and the renovating. I need someone with your organization skills to help me get more accomplished. But, I can't keep up with someone working too much and I do need to be part of this project! Sounds like you've actually done a lot yourself, for yourself. Congratulations to you both. Blessings in 2021!!!! Elizabeth

Jump to this post

Elizabeth and @sundance6 - Well, I tried wriggling my nose, closing the door so the fairies would come and work on it, and ignoring it - nothing helped. So this summer I started " at least one shelf, one drawer or one box a day" - this works! I have made it through the bedroom, the guest room, the laundry room (except for 2 shelves in one small cabinet that is really craft room overflow), the linen closet and the kitchen. I started the family room before my daughter had to make an emergency move, and took it over for her plants and as a work from home office.
Some days I actually manage 2-4 hours, other days one box and about 30 minutes is all that happens. Now I have started my sewing/craft room, which I expect to take at least a month, or maybe all winter.
Elizabeth - if I travel, it will be post-vaccine, to go to my tiny home in Far South Texas for a few weeks or to Spokane to visit my husband's 84 yo sis.
Sundance - where will you be moving in Northern NM? We love using the Gallup area as a base when we tour all the fabulous ruins, parks and pueblos in the area.
Sue

REPLY
1 reply
Sundance(RB) | @sundance6 | Jan 3, 2021
In reply to @sueinmn "Elizabeth and @sundance6 - Well, I tried wriggling my nose, closing the door so the fairies..." + (show)
@sueinmn

Elizabeth and @sundance6 - Well, I tried wriggling my nose, closing the door so the fairies would come and work on it, and ignoring it - nothing helped. So this summer I started " at least one shelf, one drawer or one box a day" - this works! I have made it through the bedroom, the guest room, the laundry room (except for 2 shelves in one small cabinet that is really craft room overflow), the linen closet and the kitchen. I started the family room before my daughter had to make an emergency move, and took it over for her plants and as a work from home office.
Some days I actually manage 2-4 hours, other days one box and about 30 minutes is all that happens. Now I have started my sewing/craft room, which I expect to take at least a month, or maybe all winter.
Elizabeth - if I travel, it will be post-vaccine, to go to my tiny home in Far South Texas for a few weeks or to Spokane to visit my husband's 84 yo sis.
Sundance - where will you be moving in Northern NM? We love using the Gallup area as a base when we tour all the fabulous ruins, parks and pueblos in the area.
Sue

Jump to this post

Sue, You just cracked me up for the afternoon! You're right it takes one box at a time! As the old saying goes, " A Journey of a Thousand Miles begins with the First Step!"
So you know New Mexico! That's why I have started puting From "The Land of Enchament" in my Signature! I have been truly Blessed living here for the last 45 years. It is a Truly Enchanted Place!
I'm moving up in the Four Corners area above Chaco Canyon. Have four choices, my family lifes in Aztec.Bloomfield is just 6 miles south of there, Farmington is 10 miles west of there and Durango CO. is thirty miles north!
They are all options!
I've lived in ABQ for the last 45 so it is hard to leave here! I've been lucky enough that my business has taken me down every little road and town in the state!
So what little town in South Texas are you from? I used to cover all of the Panhandle down to San Angelo and south to Lajitas and the Big Bend.
Also, part of my life some summers were spent in Spokane! Had an Uncle that owned a meat packing plant there, he had a cabin out on Hayden Lake east of town. Enjoyed that area!
My nose was really getting sore trying to get it all done! I guess the New Year is a time to get with it! Even though I don't let things get to me, I guess 2020 was a real Sh$##y year! Keep me posted if you ever want any info on New Mexico, So. COL. or Arizona!
From, The Land of Enchantment!
Sundance(RB)

REPLY
1 reply
Mentor
Sue, Volunteer Mentor | @sueinmn | Jan 4, 2021
In reply to @sundance6 "Sue, You just cracked me up for the afternoon! You're right it takes one box at..." + (show)
@sundance6

Sue, You just cracked me up for the afternoon! You're right it takes one box at a time! As the old saying goes, " A Journey of a Thousand Miles begins with the First Step!"
So you know New Mexico! That's why I have started puting From "The Land of Enchament" in my Signature! I have been truly Blessed living here for the last 45 years. It is a Truly Enchanted Place!
I'm moving up in the Four Corners area above Chaco Canyon. Have four choices, my family lifes in Aztec.Bloomfield is just 6 miles south of there, Farmington is 10 miles west of there and Durango CO. is thirty miles north!
They are all options!
I've lived in ABQ for the last 45 so it is hard to leave here! I've been lucky enough that my business has taken me down every little road and town in the state!
So what little town in South Texas are you from? I used to cover all of the Panhandle down to San Angelo and south to Lajitas and the Big Bend.
Also, part of my life some summers were spent in Spokane! Had an Uncle that owned a meat packing plant there, he had a cabin out on Hayden Lake east of town. Enjoyed that area!
My nose was really getting sore trying to get it all done! I guess the New Year is a time to get with it! Even though I don't let things get to me, I guess 2020 was a real Sh$##y year! Keep me posted if you ever want any info on New Mexico, So. COL. or Arizona!
From, The Land of Enchantment!
Sundance(RB)

Jump to this post

Well, Sundance, you really hit it for me - Chaco Canyon is one of my favorite places! We have traveled that rough road to explore the ruins several times, it is such a gem.

I'm not from Texas, but Minnesota - the Twin Cities, though over a lifetime, we have explored most of both states.

My family have been "Winter Texans" for 3 generations - going back to 1964 in Harlingen. We moved "up the Valley" and reside just west of McAllen, about 2 miles from the border. If you have seen the pics of the private border wall that is falling into the Rio Grande, that is a short bike ride from our tiny home. We also have family spread from Dallas to Houston to San Antonio.

In Washington, we have family and friends all over, and love to visit. On our last trip 2 years ago, our room in a friend's home near Puyallup looked out on Mt Rainier - what a treat.

We usually travel the US at least 6-8 weeks a year, and spend several months in Texas. This year we managed one week at a familiar condo "up North" & one overnight with the kids, so my feet at ITCHING to hit the road again.

But all this time looking at the house has gotten me moving on clearing out, so I guess that's a bright side, if there is one...

Happy sorting - how about a weekly progress report?

Here's mine - yesterday while I watched football, I started sorting rolls of fabric to donate. I used to costume belly dancers and do some upholstery work, neither of which I see in my future, so I have 20 large cardboard tubes to recycle and 100 + yards of fabric marked for new homes. Next up - 2 dozen or so bins and tubs of various fabrics, already sorted by type, use, or color. Way more than I will ever use, so it's time to share.

And a progress report for my daughter - she will bring all her boxes of excess clothing, towels & bedding to our guest room and sort it to keep, donate or throw away. Then we will fill my car (several times I'm sure - it's just a little station wagon) and I will transport. After she saw her temporary flat with one closet, one bedroom and no storage room, she knew she had to do something drastic!
Sue

REPLY
2 replies
Mentor
Ginger, Volunteer Mentor | @gingerw | Jan 4, 2021
In reply to @sueinmn "Well, Sundance, you really hit it for me - Chaco Canyon is one of my favorite..." + (show)
@sueinmn

Well, Sundance, you really hit it for me - Chaco Canyon is one of my favorite places! We have traveled that rough road to explore the ruins several times, it is such a gem.

I'm not from Texas, but Minnesota - the Twin Cities, though over a lifetime, we have explored most of both states.

My family have been "Winter Texans" for 3 generations - going back to 1964 in Harlingen. We moved "up the Valley" and reside just west of McAllen, about 2 miles from the border. If you have seen the pics of the private border wall that is falling into the Rio Grande, that is a short bike ride from our tiny home. We also have family spread from Dallas to Houston to San Antonio.

In Washington, we have family and friends all over, and love to visit. On our last trip 2 years ago, our room in a friend's home near Puyallup looked out on Mt Rainier - what a treat.

We usually travel the US at least 6-8 weeks a year, and spend several months in Texas. This year we managed one week at a familiar condo "up North" & one overnight with the kids, so my feet at ITCHING to hit the road again.

But all this time looking at the house has gotten me moving on clearing out, so I guess that's a bright side, if there is one...

Happy sorting - how about a weekly progress report?

Here's mine - yesterday while I watched football, I started sorting rolls of fabric to donate. I used to costume belly dancers and do some upholstery work, neither of which I see in my future, so I have 20 large cardboard tubes to recycle and 100 + yards of fabric marked for new homes. Next up - 2 dozen or so bins and tubs of various fabrics, already sorted by type, use, or color. Way more than I will ever use, so it's time to share.

And a progress report for my daughter - she will bring all her boxes of excess clothing, towels & bedding to our guest room and sort it to keep, donate or throw away. Then we will fill my car (several times I'm sure - it's just a little station wagon) and I will transport. After she saw her temporary flat with one closet, one bedroom and no storage room, she knew she had to do something drastic!
Sue

Jump to this post

@sueinmn Belly dancers doing upholstery work. The visual is bringing a smile to my face!
I am still sorting quilt patterns from a huge tote bin. I will be sending yarn on to a friend who now lives full-time in a motorhome and travels, in her color choices. Found more flannel that is used for backing my quick lap quilts, so definitely no need to buy more! Going through everything makes me more enthused about tackling projects I want to do. Downsized books from 3 six-foot bookcases to one 6' plus part of a four foot one. Have promised myself to borrow from the local coffeehouse and return read books there. Hoping to go through kitchen drawers and rehome duplicates. Why do we need two breadmakers?
Ginger

REPLY
1 reply
Sundance(RB) | @sundance6 | Jan 4, 2021
In reply to @sueinmn "Well, Sundance, you really hit it for me - Chaco Canyon is one of my favorite..." + (show)
@sueinmn

Well, Sundance, you really hit it for me - Chaco Canyon is one of my favorite places! We have traveled that rough road to explore the ruins several times, it is such a gem.

I'm not from Texas, but Minnesota - the Twin Cities, though over a lifetime, we have explored most of both states.

My family have been "Winter Texans" for 3 generations - going back to 1964 in Harlingen. We moved "up the Valley" and reside just west of McAllen, about 2 miles from the border. If you have seen the pics of the private border wall that is falling into the Rio Grande, that is a short bike ride from our tiny home. We also have family spread from Dallas to Houston to San Antonio.

In Washington, we have family and friends all over, and love to visit. On our last trip 2 years ago, our room in a friend's home near Puyallup looked out on Mt Rainier - what a treat.

We usually travel the US at least 6-8 weeks a year, and spend several months in Texas. This year we managed one week at a familiar condo "up North" & one overnight with the kids, so my feet at ITCHING to hit the road again.

But all this time looking at the house has gotten me moving on clearing out, so I guess that's a bright side, if there is one...

Happy sorting - how about a weekly progress report?

Here's mine - yesterday while I watched football, I started sorting rolls of fabric to donate. I used to costume belly dancers and do some upholstery work, neither of which I see in my future, so I have 20 large cardboard tubes to recycle and 100 + yards of fabric marked for new homes. Next up - 2 dozen or so bins and tubs of various fabrics, already sorted by type, use, or color. Way more than I will ever use, so it's time to share.

And a progress report for my daughter - she will bring all her boxes of excess clothing, towels & bedding to our guest room and sort it to keep, donate or throw away. Then we will fill my car (several times I'm sure - it's just a little station wagon) and I will transport. After she saw her temporary flat with one closet, one bedroom and no storage room, she knew she had to do something drastic!
Sue

Jump to this post

Thanks Sue! You don't want to ever take that road after rain or snow! The worst is going south out of Chaco towards Cuba or Gallup! It makes the road coming in from US 550 look like I-40! Looks like something out of a Four Wheller add. They say they keep the roads that bad to dicourage visitors! Strange!
Took your advice after my coffee and reading the paper I packed three boxes of stuff from my living room and dining room
Thanks for the advice!
Travel Safe!
Sundance(RB)

REPLY
1 reply
Mentor
Sue, Volunteer Mentor | @sueinmn | Jan 4, 2021
In reply to @sundance6 "Thanks Sue! You don't want to ever take that road after rain or snow! The worst..." + (show)
@sundance6

Thanks Sue! You don't want to ever take that road after rain or snow! The worst is going south out of Chaco towards Cuba or Gallup! It makes the road coming in from US 550 look like I-40! Looks like something out of a Four Wheller add. They say they keep the roads that bad to dicourage visitors! Strange!
Took your advice after my coffee and reading the paper I packed three boxes of stuff from my living room and dining room
Thanks for the advice!
Travel Safe!
Sundance(RB)

Jump to this post

Oooh Sundance, we know the Southern route well. My teeth chattered for 3 days afterward!
As for the packing, how much did you pack to keep, to donate & to toss? That's the real key!

I figure for every place a attack, about 50% stays, 25% is trashed, and 25% is donated. We have a group on Facebook here called "Buy Nothing [City Name]" - you post whatever you want to get rid of, interested parties respond and you arrange a safe pickup. We have rehomed so much between there and the charity that sets people up in new housing.
Sue

REPLY
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