Safety First!
My husband died two months ago and after 30 years with a wonderful man that I love very much I find myself living totally alone! I began thinking, "What if something should happen?" So I started taking precautions to prevent things from happening:
-I put the phone in the bathroom nearby when I take a shower in case I fell and had to call 911. I also leave the back door unlocked when I shower. If the police have to come and can't get in, they will knock the door down! The rest of the day and night, all doors and windows are locked!
-I have a car alarm to guard against theft.
-I go shopping very early in the morning. I live 15 miles north of Seattle and all their drug using population who are now drifting up into our area. But early in the morning, they are all passed out and it's safe to shop.
-I don't have garage sales. I don't want strangers to know where I live!
-I have no decorative shades on ceiling lights so it's easier and safer to change a light bulb. (I get dizzy if I look up too long.)
That's about as far as I've gotten regarding my safety. Does anyone have any other suggestions that I could consider? I'd really appreciate it!
PML
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@pml These are all good ideas.
1. If you have stairs in your house do not put anything on the stairs. I used to do this thinking I'd take something up or down but I've learned that this is a hazard for tripping.
2. Do you have someone you check in with every day? A neighbor? Family member?
Helen,
That's a good idea about the stairs! I don't have stairs in my house but the outside steps are stairs. I used to put cute plants on them but I don't think I will anymore. The steps do have railings which I use. At 78, you aren't as steady as you used to be!
Yes, I do have three neighbors who I see everyday at the mail box or the dumpster. I know they would be calling if they didn't see me for a while. The one neighbor is pruning the tops of my trees for me and the other two help by fixing things in my house such as a stuck drawer and a leaking drain pipe. I'm fortunate in that.
PML
pml, You have done some very smart things. Thank you for sharing them. Still praying for you in the homegoing of your husband.
If you have a landline number still, I would keep it in my husband's name if it is posted online or in a phone book. People look for women's phone numbers listed in their names in the phone book and that lets them know that the woman lives alone. I had a friend whose husband passed away and she left the phone number listing in his name.
Never sign a funeral home visitation book when visiting a funeral home to pay respects and put your name and address on the guest book. Our house was almost broken into one time due to us giving out our names and address in paying respect to someone. The person robbing houses, stole the family visitation book and we were next on the list to be robbed. He was caught and he was a family member of the deceased.
God Bless You precious lady. Blessings & Prayers....
My condolences on the loss of your husband. I tend to focus on safety a lot. You probably already have these things:
I’ve read there are safety alert devices you wear on your body that will alert if you fall.
Also, doorbell alarms and outside cameras so you can be alerted to anything suspicious. Motion activated outdoor lights.
Nightlights inside in all areas of house.
A list of medications and allergies on the fridge.
A cell phone with backup battery powered charger in case phone or power goes out.
Having someone check with you daily is very important with a predetermined time. I’ve heard a lot lately of some people who fell and were injured and they laid alone in the floor for days because they couldn’t get to a phone. People called, but just thought they weren’t home.
I would look into getting and wearing an Apple Watch. It can detect falls and will call Emergency Services automatically. Plus, if you fall, you may not be able to reach your phone. I don't know if other watch brands can do this. There may be some that do and are less expensive. Apple Watch, though, is MUCH less expensive than a service like Life Alert.
Also, the odds of you being injured by something as simple as a slip and fall are hundreds of times higher than someone coming into your home to harm you. Make sure you don't have any slippery area rugs or things like that. Make sure all the lights in your home are bright enough for you to see well.
Finally, is there someone--a friend or relative or maybe a local senior center--that you can ask to call you once a day to check on you? You could set two times. If you don't answer the first time because, perhaps, you're taking a nap or don't hear the phone, they would call you at the second time and only then if you didn't answer would they send someone to do a wellness check.
All great ideas.
Daily checkins by someone I think is important. I used to call my mom everyday just to make sure OK. Sometimes I got concern when did not answer, but it was always because she was out doing things.
I had one elderly neighbor who would but a sign in her window every morning that was something like "I am OK" , and remove later in day. If neighbor did not see sign the next day they knew they needed to check on her.
Not big fan of ever leaving door unlocked. Do you have a trusted neighbor to leave a key with. If do call 911, and emergency vehicles show up, the neighbor would see and offer key. I have keypad locks on my doors, so if able to call 911, I could give them the code.
There are many articles on internet about home safety, the National Institute on Aging has a checklist for home safety that has some good ideas:
https://www.nia.nih.gov/sites/default/files/2023-04/worksheet-home-safety-checklist_1.pdf
My prayers are with you, Just one thing, I would never leave my back door unlocked while showering, better to have the police break it down, than have a stranger come in on you, might help to have a security camera or alarm. God Bless You
I agree with others to lock the door while in the shower. I live in a condo and lock my door at all times.
Easier to use text check in than phone calls. I had my mother send me an email every morning just to say she was up and okay. If I didn’t receive a message by noon then I would call. If no answer then I’d go check on her because she fell a lot. Just be sure you keep your message cheery. My mother started using it to vent about everything every morning and that was a hard way to start my day.
Keep your phone with you at all times not just the shower. Or the Apple Watch or emergency alert. You know Murphy’s Law.
When cooking, don’t ever leave the kitchen. My mother was frying meat and went to the bathroom. She fell and couldn’t get up. Luckily she listened to me about keeping her phone in her walker so she was able to call me. We had a neighbor come in and turn off the stove. I moved in with her after that scary episode.
Again when cooking or baking, stay in the kitchen or sit at the dining table if you need to sit so you don’t forget you’re cooking and don’t accidentally fall asleep in a comfy recliner.
Only give your car key to the mechanic or valet. Never leave your house key on the ring.
I always check the doors before I go to bed to be sure I did lock them.
I keep a nightlight in the bathroom so I’m not walking around in the dark.
Do you have grab bars in your shower? Especially needed if stepping in and out of a tub shower.
I’ll keep thinking about precautions I take.
@californiazebra
Great suggestion about stove. I have forgoten to shut off burners or stove, luckily have newer stove that has safety measures that shuts it self off after certain time.
Be aware of who is around you, in the store or any place public. If you are speaking to a friend, and share information about your husband's passing, someone might be listening.
When you take your car in for servicing, remove the registration and insurance documents from the glove box, plus any other personal identifiers. Give only your car key to the service department.
The first thing to do when you get in your car is to lock the car doors. Likewise, when you unlock your car, open only the driver's door, not all the doors.
Remove all throw rugs in your house if possible, to help prevent slips or falls. Use small nightlights at key spots, like bathroom near the floor, kitchen counter, near the doors. Do you have pets? Make sure you collect/pick up their toys each night before bed, so you don't trip over them.
My father lived in a senior apartment complex. He raised the American flag each day. If it was not up, someone would check on him. Likewise he had severe hearing loss, and could not hear a smoke alarm. They installed a flashing light to indicate the smoke alarm after he burned toast and never heard a thing. The manager used master key to get in and make sure he was okay.
Ginger