Psychological effects of living with neuropathy

Posted by domiha @domiha, Oct 17, 2023

This is more of a whine than a question. I get so tired, not just physically but psychologically, of living with the neuropathy and the limitations. All of us here are dealing with different combinations of symptoms and to differing degrees. Some know what caused the neuropathy, while others have no idea of the origin. But in the end, we are all in the same boat. My neuropathy appeared after a lumbar laminectomy a year ago. I had such pain in my legs for the year before my surgery that the neuropathy could have been there then and I wouldn't have been able to distinguish the difference. I was SO hoping the laminectomy would fix me... and it DID take away the leg pain that was limiting my walking. I can walk again.... though I'm a bit wobbly... and I do need to take breaks every so often. But I sometimes think the psychological toll is worse than the physical. I'm 72 and have always lived with anxiety and depression issues. How I would love to just find ACCEPTANCE of the fact that this is MY LIFE at this point.... and do what I can and the neuropathy be damned. And I do try to go and do as much as possible. But wherever I go, I take my feet with me.... and thus all the symptoms that remind me that I will never be "normal" again. As they say, "misery loves company," and I wonder how some of you deal with they psychological. Anyone else feeling like this? I see a therapist, but he can't fix my feet. I go to PT, but that seems to have reached it's peak for improvement. I know there are so many people with much worse infirmities out there.... but somehow knowing that doesn't make my situation any better. Thanks for allowing me to vent. Best to all!

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I was diagnosed with spinal stenosis of Lumbar area in October 2021. After a year of trying PT, massage, pain clinic with injections in my spine, I finally was almost unable to move and gave in and had a 4-level laminectomy. Immediately, the pain all down my buttocks and legs was gone.... but I then noticed the neuropathy in my feet. It could have been there the moment my stenosis pressed my nerves to the point that it caused the leg pain and I wouldn't have known the differencce. So, whether it is idiopathic.... or from some antibiotic I took in the past... I may never know. At least I am able to walk again. My neuropathy does not (yet) incluide much pain.... rather, my feet just feel numb and tingly. But if I were to walk barefoot and step on something sharp, I would know it. It's just enough to affect my balance slightly. I need to walk every single day and rebuild some strength in my legs. For the two or 3 years before all this we had the Covid lockdown and I was not as mobile. Sitting on my keester most of the time didn't help at all. So i suppose it is a combination of things contibuting to the balance issues. I am still going to PT, but I think that has about reached it's peak. I try to still go and do as much as possible. I may have to walk a bit more slowly.... or rest a bit more often.... but I still make myself go. I feel for those who have terrible PAIN.... and cannot find any relief. I tried Gabapentin (made me loopy) and Lyrica(didn't help but I gained 30 lbs).... and now I'm taking Amitryptiline, but I can't really say it's helping. I'm taking R Alpha Lipoic Acid and Benfotiamine everyday for the past year. Not sure how long one should stay on those, but I'm about ready to cut back and see if they are really doing anything at all for me. If I notice myself getting worse, I can always go back to them. But no point in spending the money for things that don't really help a lot. Welcome to all newcombers here. I have not been her long, but I have found this site to be chock full of great information from others who are walking the same, or similar, path. Best to everyone! Mike

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@domiha Mike - reading your posts, I have to be honest, in light of your situation I feel you are handling this quite well. Why? You are discussing it and I feel that is part of the "healing" and to get to various acceptance points in this damn disease. When I went to Mayo in Rochester MN, I was told point blank there is no cure, no pill to fix for my PN. And no cause. A tough day to say the least. I experience no pain, I do have numbness, very poor balance and a periodic feeling of a decrease in confidence when a fall takes place. Your words....but I still make myself go. That's great. I was glad to see you are doing that. Keep up with doing things and keep moving. In time, it might not be easy but remain as positive as you can and yes, we sure do learn a lot from one another in the Connect. We deal with this on a day-to-day basis, who is best to know ALL the effects of PN other than those of us who live with it. Stay well! Ed

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Yes. Mine started about two years ago.I started with a cane and then had to go to a walker. I am extremely depressed. Used to travel, ski, fly, backpack, etc. Now can't even get to my pool in backyard. Stuck in my house with nothing to do. Old friends and even relatives not interested in me as I am now disabled to a point I can't go anywhere. At 76, I feel my time is up. Rich

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Most general practioners do not appreciate neuropathy.
You can get help if your proactive. After many months of pain and discomfort I told my GP that he had to due something. He recommended pain mgt and I received the pain killers. If you have painful Neuro go to pain mgt
and get a nerve conduction test. You can have your life back.

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@johnbishop

Welcome @2dogman, Thanks for sharing. Being your own advocate when it come to your health is something we all need to do a little better since it is our life. I'm not sure if you have heard about the Patient Revolution organization but they have some great tools and suggestions on working with your doctors - https://www.patientrevolution.org/tools.

Were your doctors able to identify a cause or provide a specific diagnosis for your neuropathy?

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The availability of opioids, either by the manufacturer, the FDA or CDC, has been adversely affected. While I have been under the care of a pain mgt. specialist for over 10 years, it has become almost impossible to find prescription Oxycodone & Methadone. My care has been greatly impacted and I am currently going through opioid withdrawal-in other words, another layer of pain!

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FYI I feel all of what you are feeling every day. I get up hoping my day will be more productive, more energy filled, more cheerful but that debilitating feeling of neuropathy never seems to go away. It just hangs around like a dark cloud ruining the day. Hope this cheers you up knowing someone else shares your misery, lol. Hugs and keep your chin up!

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@tessie63

FYI I feel all of what you are feeling every day. I get up hoping my day will be more productive, more energy filled, more cheerful but that debilitating feeling of neuropathy never seems to go away. It just hangs around like a dark cloud ruining the day. Hope this cheers you up knowing someone else shares your misery, lol. Hugs and keep your chin up!

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I, also, can identify with all who feel as you do. I injured my back 7 years ago while skiing. Really did a job on my lower back and buttocks. They gave me a 4-6 week time frame for an L1 stress fracture to heal, which it did. I was feeling pretty good for a few months. Then, all kinds of pain erupted. Since then I've been to more docs than I can count. Right now, I am seeing a new pain specialist who is trying to figure out what new drug to put in my pain pump that will have some helpful effect. Like you, I wake up every morning with hopeful expectations of a better day, but then it's "same old, same old". What helps me are two things: 1. Have faith that God is still in control and has a purpose for this mess. 2. I try to plan out a couple of projects that I can do and accomplish. Oh, and I try to remember that there are still lots of folks out there who have it a lot worse than me. Remember all the lousy stuff that the Apostle Paul went through for his faith, yet "considered it pure joy" to be persecuted.

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@julbpat

Also look on Amazon for ColonMax, a herbal supplement for constipation. I learned about it here.

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Hi crossette, Thank You, will look into it today!

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@SusanEllen66

@2dogman welcome! I also have severe polyneuropathy. My neurologist gave me Gabapentin, but I could not stand the fatigue, and dizziness so I don’t take it.
I do not tolerate most pain relievers other than Tylenol. Even that makes me sleepy! So, I grin and bear my discomfort.
I’m glad you are having success with your meditation. That’s important for you ability to get a good nights sleep!

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Hi dogman,
The only medication that works for me is IVIG infusions. If you are interested Company is AOM Fusion1- 845-639-4531. Your Neurologist will take of it if you have Autoimmune Symptoms.
I hope this helps?

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Hello, domiha,
I had a Laminectomy 2008, took S-1 L-2 L-3 L-4 L-5 NO FUSION!!!!!!!!! WENT DOWN HILL COULD DRIVE ANYMORE!!!!! THEN WENT TO JOHNS HOPKINS, BIG MISTAKE, PAIN MANAGEMENT DID A "NERVE BLOCK" DID NOT WAIT UNTIL SEDATION KICKED IN, I FELT HIM HIT A NERVE THAT I CAN NOT EXPLAIN HOW PAIN FULL THAT WAS, DID NOT EXPECT IT I SCREAMED!! OUT! DR. SAID, "OH THATS THE NERVE!
NOW I HAVE A PAIN PUMP THAT HELPS THE SPINE BUT DOES NOT HELP SMALL FIBER NEUROPATHY! I AM VERY DEPRESSED, I'M OUTGOING AND MY HOME IS MY JAIL. HUSBAND AND I HAVE NO FAMILY. I DON'T TELL OTHERS HOW BAD I'M BECAUSE PEOPLE HAVE THEIR OWN LIVES AND.........! NOV. 17 GOING FOR A PORT. HARD TO TAKE BLOOD NOW AND INFUSIONS.MY HUSBAND DOESN'T GET HOW BAD THIS IS. MAYBE BECAUSE I FORCE MYSELF TO COOK, LAUNDRY, STAIRS, ETC. AND I HURT MYSELF IN THE END. I REFUSE TO BABY MYSELF. DUE TO CONSTIPATION PAINFUL SITTING. THANK YOU FOR LISTENING. DO PHONE THERAPY WITH A PSY.

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