Possible agoraphobia?

Posted by grandmaraines @grandmaraines, Apr 29 9:36am

My husband has major depression and so far very little help from any meds tried. Now I fear he is showing signs of agoraphobia. He is afraid to go outside because he has to face his anxiety and fear around the outdoor chores like raking,, mowing, plowing and dealing with downed trees from storms over the last several years. He told me today even sitting out on the porch while I garden gives him anxiety and guilt because he isn't doing anything. He said it is "safer" to stay inside. He will go to church and grocery shopping or to a family thing like grandkids sport, but even those are becoming real effort, due to his depression- he is so very sad all the time. He is not afraid of open spaces or crowds or something that causes an avoidance of a place. So I do not feel it is the classic agoraphobia, but when he said he wants to stay inside where it is safe, that worries me. Where we live there are no mental health providers who are taking any new patients. Does this sound like agoraphobia? Or just another symptom of his anxiety and Depression? I am at a loss of what to do to help him.

Oh my gosh, I know exactly how your husband is feeling. I knew that I felt this way a long time ago and I did what I could to bury those feelings or avoid situations that caused me to feel like running . It came to full cycle 3 yrs ago when I couldn't leave the house or talk to anyone outside. I've been taking alprazolam (xanax) to help. But, it doesn't always work. Mine stemmed from my past and abuse. Sometimes I think some people , normally of high intelligence, are born this way. My own father at the age of 55, became sick with it and eventually tried suicide. Please be patient with your husband and try to see if you can get him to talk with a Dr. Even if it's telehealth. It doesn't get better until you figure out what's causing it and medication . Thx

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@pinkfish66

Oh my gosh, I know exactly how your husband is feeling. I knew that I felt this way a long time ago and I did what I could to bury those feelings or avoid situations that caused me to feel like running . It came to full cycle 3 yrs ago when I couldn't leave the house or talk to anyone outside. I've been taking alprazolam (xanax) to help. But, it doesn't always work. Mine stemmed from my past and abuse. Sometimes I think some people , normally of high intelligence, are born this way. My own father at the age of 55, became sick with it and eventually tried suicide. Please be patient with your husband and try to see if you can get him to talk with a Dr. Even if it's telehealth. It doesn't get better until you figure out what's causing it and medication . Thx

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Thank you for your response. He does have a phsciatrist who is touching bases via phone and trying different meds for his depression. Trying to get a counselor, they are all filled up within 50 miles of us, no new patients. So right now I am it.

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If he can leave the house for at least some things I don’t think it’s full blown agoraphobia. With true agoraphobia you go nowhere.

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@sears

If he can leave the house for at least some things I don’t think it’s full blown agoraphobia. With true agoraphobia you go nowhere.

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Yes, I agree but it is slowly getting worse. His psychiatrist also said it sounds like he may be heading that way. We are starting a new med combo today. We'll see.

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@grandmaraines
Fortunately I have never been affected by any of the issues that are affecting your husband. I have a friend in England who had very severe agoraphobia. She was in her house for years wouldn’t go out wouldn’t look through the window wouldn’t look through the peephole or open the door. It’s a long story and I won’t bore you with it but it turned out that she came to New York City so she could go to the Thanksgiving day parade. It was a slow process but inch by inch anythings a cinch. Just an example to show you what’s possible but it will take a lot of effort and determination. I agree with @pinkfisfh99(interesting name) it’s essential to know the cause then I hope he will face these issues and deal with them instead of masking the problem with dangerous drugs.
blessings to you both,
Jake

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@grandmaraines

Yes, I agree but it is slowly getting worse. His psychiatrist also said it sounds like he may be heading that way. We are starting a new med combo today. We'll see.

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Good luck and God bless. Stay proactive!

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@grandmaraines

Yes, I agree but it is slowly getting worse. His psychiatrist also said it sounds like he may be heading that way. We are starting a new med combo today. We'll see.

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If you don't mind, I was wondering what they are giving him so on my first appointment with my new doctor (may 13, 2021) I can discuss it with him?

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@pinkfish66

If you don't mind, I was wondering what they are giving him so on my first appointment with my new doctor (may 13, 2021) I can discuss it with him?

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His med combo is for depression and anxiety. He has Wellbutron and Rexulti in the morning and seraquil at night.

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@jakedduck1

@grandmaraines
Fortunately I have never been affected by any of the issues that are affecting your husband. I have a friend in England who had very severe agoraphobia. She was in her house for years wouldn’t go out wouldn’t look through the window wouldn’t look through the peephole or open the door. It’s a long story and I won’t bore you with it but it turned out that she came to New York City so she could go to the Thanksgiving day parade. It was a slow process but inch by inch anythings a cinch. Just an example to show you what’s possible but it will take a lot of effort and determination. I agree with @pinkfisfh99(interesting name) it’s essential to know the cause then I hope he will face these issues and deal with them instead of masking the problem with dangerous drugs.
blessings to you both,
Jake

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Thank you for your response. He is not there yet, but is showing tendencies. He does not want to stay home alone so I take him with me on all errands just to get him out of the house plus we go to church and choir practise 2x on Sun and to grandkids sports. It is major effort for him to go, but his aversion to being alone is his motivator.

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