People with hearing loss who have been successful in their careers
Hi -is there someone I can talk to, or read about, who's been successful in their career? I've struggled with hearing loss, and its effects, for 30+ years and because of these experiences, I've come to believe that I would not be able to navigate an employment setting in a way that would be satisfactory to any employer. I also have come to believe that advancement in any career is next to impossible for me to achieve. I've been significantly under-employed my entire life. I'm now receiving vocational rehabilitation services and I'm wondering if I've sold myself short all of these years. I think that if I were to conduct a little research into how other people have managed well in their careers, without being able to hear clearly the people around them, then I might believe that this could be possible for me, too.
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That was my reality for years as I had bilateral hearing loss and was only fit with one aid initially. The second 'hearing aid' I was fit with was a bicross that transferred sound from the unaided side to the side with the hearing aid. That was long enough ago that I had a wire in the back of my head from transmitting device to the receiving device. Next fit was wireless as technology progressed. Now I have a cochlear implant on the totally deaf side and still use a hearing aid on the other side. It works well.
Your husband may want to look into a bicross hearing aid, or possibly a BAHA (Bone anchored hearing aid) that is designed especially for single sided deafness. A cochlear implant may also be an option.
Unless he wants to get help for this you are probably stuck being his hearing ear doll. Not a problem, but the independence one gains from using technology can be life changing. Definitely; to each his/her own.
Do you find that your brain is working overtime just to navigate the very basics of a complex social situation, such as those at a workplace setting? You wrote that you missed a lot of what was said at work and I resonated with your experiences. I took care of myself physically, mentally, and socially on my own time to help mitigate the after-effects of the stress I accumulated throughout the day but this in and of itself was exhausting. Missing so much of the information that was said around me, and having to play make-up/catch-up all day every day, left me being exhausted at the end of the day. I just couldn't see my way through to advancement in any career. I was also wrestling with cognitive distortions and errors about my situation at the time, resulted in feelings of hopelessness and a significant lack of support, and I see that now. Vocational Rehabilitative Services is nice, and I'm grateful to have qualified for these services, but I'm finding myself having to teach them about some common experiences of a person with hearing loss and it has been up to me to find resources for myself. I am grateful for the support while I do this, however.
Anyway, thanks so much for sharing and I appreciate the dialogue.
Well, since we're both disabled. I doubt we'll be doing anything new for awhile. His hearing aid broke and no fixin' that baby much less getting a new one. He hated the thing anyway. We need to work on getting him new ones – ones he actually likes and won't break at the first sign of rough weather and life. Wyoming isn't exactly the easiest environment on gear like hearing aids.
@jaema Hi! Too bad you aren't in NY where a staff member not only has hearing loss, but is a member of HLAA. Could your audiologist be of any help with resources? You aren't near any Center that deals with hearing loss? You do have a big workload, what with coping with people on the job and then having to do all the research. Do you know about Katherine Bouton's latest book (her 2nd one) on hearing loss? She has a wealth of information and presents it in a relaxed, almost entertaining way – very clear-cut.
Hi, @jaema For sure! I really agree with 'your brain is working overtime…" and it is truly exhausting. My most challenging experience was going to school in France where I heard non-stop French. I am an anglophone.
Meditation helped tremendously. A yogi taught me to meditate the summer before I went to France. Lunch break was for 2 hours. – Siesta time. So, daily, after eating lunch at school, I went home and did 20 minutes of meditation and then had the energy to keep going for the rest of the day. Even now, when I am in stressful hearing situations and too much information is coming my way, a 20 minute meditation break gives me the strength and energy to keep on going.
@julie04 My earliest aid was a 3" x 3 " or there about box strapped on my chest with a long wire going to my right ear. Really fashionable as an 7 year old with a humongous box sticking out of your dress. Thank heavens audio technology has improved light years now! I am glad a CI has been working for you with your Widex aids.
What you refer to is 'auditory fatigue'. Of course we spend an incredible amount of energy working to hear and decipher what is being said. Background noise is a monster for all of us. It's very easy to just turn out sometimes….which gives people the impression that we aren't paying attention, don't care, or don't 'get it'. I highly recommend learning and practicing basic stress management techniques. Something as simple as rhythmic breathing can help.
I wasn't diagnosed with HL until I was a college student; early 20s. That was in 1962. I missed the 'big box' devices and also shunned the ones I ended up getting. I put off getting them for nearly a decade.
I get it. In those 10 years devices did get a bit better. Being a kid in '62 I did as my parents asked 🙂 Behind the ear aids,tho huge were a fantastic update! Sorry about that decade where you put off getting them. It is a psychological struggle to accept all this.
I worked with a hearing consultant recently and I think the main take-away for me was that there is technology available, the specifics of which will be relatively unknown until I actually have need for accommodations in a workplace setting. I don't think that embarrassment is the issue for me here, it’s how helpful the technology really is in addressing the problem that’s the issue for me. Does it reduce the communication barrier or does it simply throw up a different one? However, I now know that technology is available, and I have a right to ask for it. I wasn't amenable to this idea for years, unfortunately.
So, I still don't know what works for me yet, but I do know what doesn't work for me: hearing aids. Speech recognition is a challenge with how much these hearing aids manage the sound that’s coming in. I have mostly conductive hearing loss and my cochlear is in pretty good shape. The amount of interference that these hearing aids create is super unhelpful for me.
However, I suspect that I will be asked repeatedly to use them as I continue on my VRS journey. I do resent this; however, if I'm not willing to wear hearing aids then maybe I shouldn’t expect any further help, I don’t know. This would be far from perfect but nothing’s perfect, I guess. Regular headsets have worked like a dream for me with Zoom calls this year so maybe there’s more to pursue there. I’ve learned a lot so far.
Oh, and I was already planning to join HLAA! It’s been on my task list for a while now so I will take this reminder as a motivation to get this done tonight. Thank you!
@jaema What kind of headphones worked so well for you … ? Have you told your ear doctor how well they work.? There are a lot of different ways that headphones work but essentially they amplify a modulated electric signal to sound. You say that your cochlear is in good shape,… What have doctors and test shown that is NOT in good shape ?…. Ear Drum? Middle Ear (little bones)?
I have a question about hearing loss. At what point does a person qualify for CI?
I did volunteer at a local organization giving food away. The volunteers were super nice. However, where we stood around large tables, doing our jobs, I wasn't close enough to hear them. I told everyone I wore hearing aids but couldn't hear well. People forget and just go about talking to each other. They may say a few sentences louder but then forget, I couldn't hear them. This is so very frustrating. I volunteered because I wanted to do something to help but also because even though I have a husband. I quit volunteering because I can't hear the people. My husband doesn't like the fact he has to talk loudly to me. He talks to me from a room which is the room which is five rooms away. I tell him I can't hear him–then he gets upset. He has a very hard time dealing with it. Well, I have had hearing loss which started when my first husband came home at 3:00 am and ripped me out of a sound sleep and hit me over and over, breaking my ear drum. That is another story. He got married seven times and abused every wife! My daughter told me I answered people with statements which weren't even related to the question. I wondered why they looked at me very puzzled. I couldn't even hear my baby cry when I got remarried and had a baby. My little boy used to come to me and say: "Mommy, your baby is crying." I got another place for my baby to sleep or whatever near the kitchen where I could see her and hear her in the day time.
I don't like to go anywhere anymore. I can't hear what people are saying. After I receive the vaccinations against COVID, I am going to get fitted for blue tooth hearing aids. I am very anxious!
@woogie My Starkey HA have a remote Mic on a lanyard or with a clip that you can give to your partner.. husband .. to wear.. the remote mic is Bluetooth.. and has to be charged.. but it works great.. he can hang that around his neck and talk to you from anywhere in the house usually…. It works with your Smart Cell Phone.. so you have to have that as well..