I’m an off and on smoker how can I stop for good?

Hello @eileenj1960, Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. It’s completely understandable to have difficulties quitting smoking — nicotine addiction is real, and quitting (and staying quit) can be really tough.

In fact, it can take anywhere from 5 to 30 attempts before someone is able to quit for good.

@eileenj1960 - You mentioned using smoking as a crutch, as well as having had some success in the past. What have you identified the crutch to be helping with? And what has been your longest stretch of time without smoking?

Here's my advice. I'm on day 127 of not smoking. The doc thinks I have copd when I was last diagnosed with bronchitis. The copd thing scares me a lot. So I have a clear motivation to quit and fear works good. I wonder how it might work for you.

https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/wanting-to-quit-smoking/
https://connect.mayoclinic.org/comment/1302444/
Hello @eileenj1960
I join our Moderator @kelseyt in welcoming you to Mayo Clinic Connect.
I posted a couple of links from other places on Connect about quitting smoking. You may find them interesting.
I KNOW how hard it is to quit!! I was a dedicated smoker for over 42 years. There is nothing on the planet that is like nicotine addiction.
It's terrible!
I wanted to quit, because like all smokers, I knew it was bad for my health. But knowing that did not stop me from smoking for 42 years!
I honestly think the best way to quit smoking is the one that works for you. All kinds of people have quit this nasty habit, and we each used different approaches to accomplish freedom.
I use the word "freedom" because once you do...you realize what a slave you have been. There is nothing like the freedom from cigarettes!
No two people are the same, so you can bet not one single way to quit smoking works for everyone.
I quit cold turkey.
January 8, 2018.
Never smoked again.
Cold turkey smokers have a 98% chance of smoking again. I guess I am blessed to be the 2% that made it. I still miss a cigarette, but those cravings got less and less as I put more time between my last cigarette and my day of freedom.
I was a slave to them. These stupid little things controlled me. I hated that!!! Grr!!
Standing in the rain to smoke while my friends were inside laughing.
Having to stop whatever I was doing to go smoke.
Making sure I had my lighter and a pack of smokes everywhere I went.
Driving to the scary gas station convenience store at 1230 in the morning because I ran out.
Wow. Dedication right?
But the fear, and it was fear, of not having them was so overpowering. I honestly thought I would never enjoy my life again without this sick habit.
How could I enjoy a wedding? A fun party? Be able to think? Talk on the phone. Be sad. Be happy. I assigned cigarettes as the multi-purpose item I needed for all these situations.
Truth?
It's an addiction.
What really, really helped me was I wanted to quit, and I was afraid of the date. So I didn't use a date. Instead, I let the day pick me. I also got Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking and it was life changing for me.
I learned so much about addition and it helped me by seeing the psychological stuff behind all this silliness.

The first two weeks were tough.
Not gonna lie!
But I went to the Dollar Store, got bags of cinnamon candies and every time the craving would come, I'd pop a cinnamon candy. During commercials, when I would go outside to smoke, I instead would busy myself by keeping my hands busy. Like straighten out the linen closet. Or the pantry. Or my sock drawer. I learned from Allen Carr that the cravings last about five minutes. If you can get through it...you just accomplished something good for you.
Smokers do not need people to ask them if we know how bad this is for us.
We know!
We know already, okay?!
But learning as much as you can about the psychology of addiction from Allen Carr may be helpful to you too?
I would encourage you to not give up trying to give up!
You will not believe how wonderful life is without them!
It is one of the best things I ever did for myself, and I am so glad I did.
Not what you think...which is how horrible life will be.

Hi Kelsey,
Thank you so much for your reply. I totally identify with you. The longest I quit was 8 months. I was free from this nasty smelling thing. Or so I thought I was.

Then one day I was visiting my cousin, who is a smoker. I thought “I’ll just have one.” Well addiction has a voice and then one turned into two and so on. I was a failure! I couldn’t believe I started again and I was so mad at myself. I hate the smell but like to smoke. Now I’m ready to quit smoking again.

What I did the last time was set a date and weaned myself off a little at a time. My Dr. ordered me the patch and it helped. Is the person you mentioned, is it a book? The name sounds familiar. I really appreciate your reply. I will keep you posted on my progress. Have a blessed day.

Thank you for your reply. Congratulations on having 127 now 128 days smoke free! I replied to the moderator. You can read their my comment. Have a blessed day!

Hi @eileenj1960, this is Debra/@karukgirl, yes Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking is a book.
I got mine on Ebay for about $4, which is less than a pack of cigarettes!
I have smoked several times in my dreams. It seems so real, and each time I am so shocked and ashamed of myself. It's my conscious telling me "don't do it!"...and I haven't.
I enjoyed smoking too, and learning why in the Allen Carr book was so helpful to be able to find a work-around for the cravings.
YOU CAN DO THIS!
You have before. This is one of those situations where being a "quitter" is a good thing!
Like I said before, no two people are alike, therefore, there is no certain way to quit that will work for everyone. What helped me may not do a single thing for someone else. I only share what I did in case it does help!
Each year, on my quitting anniversary, I buy myself something I would normally not. Like fancy cowgirl boots, or a special kitchen appliance.
A pack a day X one month X 12 = $$$ a lot! It's my gift to myself.
I feel so much better and regret nothing. It was hard, but I prayed for help and was granted freedom from this hideous addiction.
I do hope you come back and share how it's going. I didn't have anyone I could share with who were smokers and would understand the cravings, the urges, the feeling of that first puff...but it didn't matter, I had asked for help in prayer...and He heard.

I am quitting. One week today, I'm down to 1 per day. I was smoking about 6 day again post right lower lobectomy Stage 1A1 nsclc January 2024. Prior to that I was a life long smoker, much more than 6 since I started at age 14. I'm 70 now. I had no signs of lung cancer & also COPD/emphazyma, but my GP made me to a lung cancer screening due to my age & risk status & I'm SO glad I did it. So I had the lobectomy, but not long after, I started smoking again from 1 up to about 6 a day. I've had the 3 month ct scans, then up to my 6 month scan. They've been following 2 upper left nodules that have remained 'stable', but Aug 1, my scan showed 'stable', but one has grown 2mm so my doc had me do a PET scan. It's ok, going to scan again in 6 months because of being cautious & the SUV was very low (little activity), but the emphzyma showed worse. I still really don't show any symptoms other than a little shortness of breath & chest tightness. Long story short, this time it scared the holy crap out of me & so did my doctor. He strongly told me to quit. So now I wait til February for my next scan & leaving his office, I decided that I am done. I don't want to go back in Feb against his strong suggestions only to find out something worse than what I dreaded this time. I think it was the fear, my mind set totally changed & the determination that I CAN DO THIS. So I'm using patches, weaned for this week & yesterday & today I'm down to 1. I really am not having cravings & if so, I get up & get busy with something. It passes. Frankly I'm starting to feel better already! No smell (except for that 1 cig) & I'm feeling more & more confident that I am going to do this. Allen Carr has a You Tube video too but I haven't watched it yet. I will, but I'm done with the excuses; stress, boredom, cravings, routine etc that keeps me smoking but mostly, my cancer coming back scared me to death! I wish you luck, but I bet you can do it. It's a mind set. No one can point out all of the reasons why to you, you know all that. I didn't set a date, it just came. I do feel better after one week & hope it's even better next week. A day, week at a time! Just try it again before you get a health scare cause then it's too late.