How does hearing loss change you?

Posted by joangela @joangela, May 11, 2019

For me, hearing loss has always been a part of my life. Those darn hearing tests in elementary school always put me in the category of hearing loss. Now, that I am much older, in my late 50s my hearing loss is profound. It is so bad, even my hearing family, has a real hard time adjusting to it.
How it has really changed me?
I was a small business owner, and a top notch sales person. I was a huge people person and an excellent communicator. It’s all gone.
A major change in my life.
How about you?

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The change for me has been in my ability to understand what people say is social and work situations. When I ask friends, family members or colleagues to repeat what they said with a little more volume and enunciation, I get looks like I am stupid or that I am less intelligent than the speaker who can't speak up and enunciate. That is usually not true because I have a very high IQ (not bragging). I have found that more intelligent people tend to understand my infirmary and empathize with my hearing loss. And it's not like I haven't tried to accommodate those around me. I wear some of the most expensive hearing aids out there - Oticon Opn's. Unfortunately, hearing aids are mostly developed by people who have no hearing loss and the hearing aids don't live up to the hype.

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I totally agree with you. I work in a grocery store and am a people person. When I cashier the difference is really hard to deal with. Even with hearing aides it is difficult to carry a conversation. So many times I don't hear them and find it embarrassing to get them to repeat what they say. What I hear is not always what they say. Life has definitely changed and is frustrating at times. Due to an Acoustic Neuroma tumor I have total hearing loss in my right ear. I am learning to deal with it and learning to be grateful for what I do have. The tumor was non cancerous and I'm still here for my children.

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I simply say, after anytime asking someone to repeat what they say... that "I have the best hearing aids on the market, but nothing replaces God-given hearing." For family, I have to keep reminding them that they need to know they have my attention before they speak to me. If in another room, they should call out, " (name)..... can you hear me?" first, before begining to talk to you. In same room, opening the fridge and starting to talk to me, while their face is toward inside of the fridge doesn't work at all well, as to my understanding what they're saying. At work, in casual situtations, such as a lunch break, can remark that if young people knew the down side of hearing loss, they'd take better care to lower the volume to their music. And, remind... that Medical studies have never found a link between IQ and hearing loss. And "Thank you God," remember, you are not to be considered "deaf". You have a hearing loss, or hard of hearing.

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@bobbyboomer

I can't watch TV without captions, which is OK because the only time the TV is on is when a Netflix disk comes in the mail.

I don't go to theater anymore because I have trouble with speech.

I find myself dominating conversation so I don't have to work to understand others, and when I realize this, I check myself.

I avoid some situations where there are a lot of people, especially in a noisy environment.

I still work, I'm a musician and I still sing and play music, pitches are OK, it's just those darn consonants that trip me up.

I do the best I can, and am patiently waiting for a cure.

Bob

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The ear phones have made listening to TV an absolute joy. I use the big soft pads that surround the ears. Plugs into TV, with charge stand by the T.V. As to music, I do not enjoy playing on my keyboard, nor listening to some music as much anymore... music in restaurants is annoying. A talker, I now talk less, go to restaurants where just one group at my table as my preference. I'll settle for hearing aids, for the terrible high price they cost to actually improve the quality of my hearing. My keyboard, if not wearing head phones, sounds super tinny. As to any cure, I'd forget that. But seems tech could vastly improve hearing reception by now.

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@contentandwell

@bookysue I have Oticons and I do have their "Connect Clip" that one person can wear but when you are in a group, who do you give it too? I thought about my daughter because she probably has the highest voice and that frequency is the most difficult for me. Also, in our family room the furniture is soft and we have a rug over hardwood floors.
JK

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Some folks have passed around the clip. I know it’s hard in group settings- and in a restaurant- ahh Do research on furniture set ul( sounds like yours is along the right path). It is interesting

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@christinelouise

It makes me glad that my Dad, who can't hear very well, will let me know when he can't hear me. He feels comfortable doing this at home around family. Then my brother or Mom will repeat what I say because he can understand them better. I often use hand motions to help him understand. For some reason, some voices he can hear better than others.
Christine

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Men voices as a rule are easier for me.

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I have the connect clip, but mainly use it as a discreet volume control. I like symphonies, and when going to a concert I can adjust the volume so that it's not too loud and damaging to my ears. Plus when the applause starts, I can turn them way down in a hurry.

I'm also a career musician. I keep the stage volume at 90dba or less. I know 85 is max safe, so I can turn the ears down a couple of 'clicks' and at the end of the song turn it back up to hear an audience member speak without calling attention to my hearing aids.

I suppose I could give the clip to someone, and thought about this for noisy situations like restaurants where I want to hear my DW. But we learned where to sit, in new places ask for a quiet corner and sit side by side. She knows how to talk to be understood.

I tried it for the cell phone, but hearing conversations in both ears was disturbing to me. I figure I could get used to it if I had to though. At home I have a Clarity amplified/equalized phone and if using the cell, it's easier as a speakerphone for me.

I got the rechargeable batteries and charger, but to tell the truth, I'm disappointed. The batteries don't last 16 hours and will die in the evening. If I take them out for a half hour mid-day and put them in the charger, they will make it, but that isn't always possible, so I take disposables with me.

Bob

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@marijaneb

The ear phones have made listening to TV an absolute joy. I use the big soft pads that surround the ears. Plugs into TV, with charge stand by the T.V. As to music, I do not enjoy playing on my keyboard, nor listening to some music as much anymore... music in restaurants is annoying. A talker, I now talk less, go to restaurants where just one group at my table as my preference. I'll settle for hearing aids, for the terrible high price they cost to actually improve the quality of my hearing. My keyboard, if not wearing head phones, sounds super tinny. As to any cure, I'd forget that. But seems tech could vastly improve hearing reception by now.

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In the last 5 to 10 years, technology has expanded to areas unbelievable when compared to what we had just 20 years ago. I am in my upper 60's and had NO knowledge of technology for my hearing loss. I was in every sense of the word - deaf. Technology has gone through exceptional strides to work on developing a computer that can live inside as well as outside your ear. It use to be worn around your chest or around your belt area. They were amplifiers - somewhat like they were around the early 1990's and year 2000 when I receive my first set of hearing aids. No digital hearing aids...yet. They would come soon with young minds inventing the mobile phones and newer and smaller computers/laptops etc. You see, with the technology age came the idea of making everything smaller and stronger - doing everything with a microchip. Gathering sounds - noises you hear is a very techie thing in the world that we live. Our speech can be measured by what you see on your audiogram - if you want to use a simple diagram. It can get more detailed if you look at music though. All of the instruments and sounds of music are at a much larger range then the human voice. Even animals, birds and other sounds around us - all have different tones and vibrations in the air that need to be measured to be caught in the ear or by the hearing aid. This is definitely a science that is still in it's infancy. Down the road, and they are working on the music portion now, you will be able to hear music with the hearing aids of the future. But right now, we need to be patient. What we once were able to hear with our original ears, before our hearing loss, they will work hard to mimic it with aids as best as they can in the future.

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@nurseheadakes

In the last 5 to 10 years, technology has expanded to areas unbelievable when compared to what we had just 20 years ago. I am in my upper 60's and had NO knowledge of technology for my hearing loss. I was in every sense of the word - deaf. Technology has gone through exceptional strides to work on developing a computer that can live inside as well as outside your ear. It use to be worn around your chest or around your belt area. They were amplifiers - somewhat like they were around the early 1990's and year 2000 when I receive my first set of hearing aids. No digital hearing aids...yet. They would come soon with young minds inventing the mobile phones and newer and smaller computers/laptops etc. You see, with the technology age came the idea of making everything smaller and stronger - doing everything with a microchip. Gathering sounds - noises you hear is a very techie thing in the world that we live. Our speech can be measured by what you see on your audiogram - if you want to use a simple diagram. It can get more detailed if you look at music though. All of the instruments and sounds of music are at a much larger range then the human voice. Even animals, birds and other sounds around us - all have different tones and vibrations in the air that need to be measured to be caught in the ear or by the hearing aid. This is definitely a science that is still in it's infancy. Down the road, and they are working on the music portion now, you will be able to hear music with the hearing aids of the future. But right now, we need to be patient. What we once were able to hear with our original ears, before our hearing loss, they will work hard to mimic it with aids as best as they can in the future.

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I agree, all this technology is wonderful. And the new aids I have are much better than the old ones.

They may eat batteries for lunch, but the highs are better. I suppose they are sampling the input sound at a higher bit rate which uses more power and thus the shortened battery life. Because I hate disposable products due to their impact on the environment, I went for the rechargeable option, but I need to recharge a half hour mid-day for them to make it until I go to bed.

However, the thing I'm anticipating most, and it might be a dream; it's medical science figuring out how to re-grow the cilia 'hair cells' or whatever else is needed to cure the problem instead of treating it.

The aids are like a crutch to a person with one broken leg. They might get your from point A to point B, but not like they did before the problem.

Even with the aids I need captioning, and I avoid big groups in noisy places as the chatter tends to be a blur. I'm sure that's not uncommon in this group.

Whenever I read anything about a cure, it's always 5-10 years in the future. Of course it was 5=10 years in the future 10 years ago. It's obviously not an easy problem to solve, but I'm glad they are still working on it.

I guy can dream, can't he?

Bob

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I rely on my wife to be my "'Hearing Ear Puppy" in many situations. She knows I have problems with speech, especially with someone soft-spoken or with a thick accent, so she finds a way to repeat what is necessary.

As a musician I've always used custom fit, high fidelity, musician's ear plugs to keep the volume hitting my ears at 85db or less. A misdiagnosed (three times) allergic reaction to dust mites eventually took about 70db out of the high end before they figured out what was causing it.

Wearing ear plugs on stage now makes it impossible to hear comments from the audience. Add another 15db of attenuation and it's useless.

I keep the stage levels under 90dba and turn my aids down. Since the dome inside my ear is solid except for 2 small vents, it acts as an ear plug, and with all the experience I have, I can estimate 85dba very well. So other than age factors, I'm not damaging my ears more than the dust mites did.

Between songs, I have the connect clip and if need be, I can discretely turn the volume back to normal and have a better chance at understanding what is said. My DW is my duo partner, and she fields a lot of that for me.

But for the past 20 years, I have my duo partner go out in the audience area with a sound level meter when we do the sound check. We do this before they arrive. We try to pin the sound to peak about 80dba so that we don't damage the ears of our audience members. Since our market is senior citizens they usually appreciate that. And if they ask us to turn it up we will -- the customer is always right -- but then if they damage their ears it's their choice, not ours.

So the loss complicates my profession and compromises my life, but at least I'm still alive, and can still play music because I hear pitches Ok. There are a lot of people with worse disabilities so in the end I'm not doing too bad.

Bob

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