How about a laugh, (hopefully)

My father expired when we were not able to remember his blood type. We kept asking him his blood type, but he kept insisting that we “be positive.”

Old joke:

If your nose runs and your feet smell...
You're built upside-down.

Warner Brothers Looney Tunes-cartoons most of us in our age saw as kids.

Is there anything funnier? I watch them on YOUTUBE every time they are on. It’s like watching a Mel Brooks movie or Monty Python sketches, like the Dead Parrot…

The sillier the better….

@judyandchloe
I watch then every Saturday. 😂
I like them all but fog horn leg horn is my favorite. Of course it's hard to choose, but I like Sylvester and Tweety and the roadrunner and the coyote too.
Jake

@jakedduck1 the Wallander the walls of my house are covered with real cartoon cels and lithographs from Bugs Bunny shows-Daffy, Wile, The Minster, Witchy Poo, etc…they make me smile everyday - and are a good investment. I even have WB Fiesta ware…I need silly a Lot any more…

I was doing an inspection of a daycare facility, sitting on a small chair writing a report. This youngster came running across the room a threw himself into my arms while yelling daddy. One of the ladies made a remark about knowing I had a number of children, but didn’t know about my extras. I quickly pointed out he wasn’t mine, needless to say some found that comment very funny. In hindsight I’m sure it was.

A pastor giving a children's sermon on vestments asked:
"Why do you think I wear this collar?"
One kid answered:
"Because it kills ticks and fleas up to 30 days?"

A man decides to take up gardening as a relaxing retirement hobby, so he buys a small house with a huge backyard.
After months of digging, planting, weeding, and watering, he finally turns what was a completely neglected, overgrown mud pit into a breathtaking paradise full of blooming flowers and pristine green lawn.
One day, his local minister stops by, admires the incredible transformation, and says, "My good man, it is truly wonderful to see what the Lord and you can accomplish when you work together!"
The gardener wipes the sweat from his brow, looks at the lawn, and says, "Amen to that, Reverend. But you should have seen the place when the Lord was running it by Himself."

I tried to tell this today and messed it up. Now I have time to remember it correctly:
A few years ago, a baby boy was born. His mother named him Benny. At the naming ceremony, an old man tottered forward up to the Mother and child. "This boy has a curse upon him. Some day the Foo bird is going to shit on him. You must tell him to wear it or something terrible will happen to him. Every year on his birthday his mother told him the story. And no one knew what a Foo bird was.

Benny grew up with no sign of a Voo bird. Benny met a young woman. They fell in love and were going to get married, Benny had grown a beautiful bread. He had it trimmed and looked sharp for the wedding. He parked his car and walked to the chapel to meet his bride and both their families. As he walked up the path, he heard a funny sound. He looked up and saw a funny looking bird crying "Foo, Foo!" Before he knew what was happening, the Foo bird dropped a load on him landing square on his beard. The smell was off

@rollingf The smell was awful and it was slimy. As he reached to wipe his face, he remembered the story and stopped. He met his bride and went inside. The smell was growing worse. Neither of them could stand it. He went to the rest room to wash his face but nothing could get the shit out of his beard, He decided to shave his beard. He got a razor and prepared to shave. As soon as the razor touched his face, a flash of lightning struck him. Benny was tuned into a large Grecian Urn ! The moral of the story is: "If the Foo shits, wear it. And, secondly, a Benny shaved, is a Benny urned!

With apologies to Ben Franklin.