Feel paralyzed by my sadness and depression

Posted by southcarolinagirl @southcarolinagirl, Feb 7, 2021

I feel so sad and depressed that I am physically paralyzed. I can’t seem to think straight or move myself to do anything. I am so lonely. I live with my disabled husband and he is a couch potato with no ambition except to eat, play on iPad and watch tv. I feel worthless as I grew up in a loveless home. I can’t seem to overcome anything today. Where do I begin? What can I do as a second step? Writing this is my first step.

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Yes, I have had the physical paralysis from depression, frustration, anxiety, whatever you want to call it. I don't want to get out of a chair because, first of all, it is physically painful, and second, I really don't want to do anything because it doesn't lift my spirits. Also, when I don't have any encouragement or support living alone, and no one comes to see me or calls during the pandemic, there is little reason to get up and move, except to go to the kitchen to feed myself.
Moving when a person dances improves the mood. Getting up to go do another chore, not so much. We get the picture. I have two granddaughters who give me praise and support when I see them, but there needs to be more positive behavior for the hard times we go through. I hope telling you I care and understand helps a little bit. When there is no date when the problem will be ending, there is no motivation for patience. But we are told to be patient.
Some days you need to have a day off from it all. Dorisena

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@annieb0188

Hi I M New Here

Hi, My name is Annie and I have chronic anxiety and Ocd and I feel like Im drowning.

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@annieb0188 First welcome! I describe my unending depression and anxiety as so overwhelming that I just want to stay in a corner, unnoticed and away from people, but debilitating to the point where I can't think. When I get a moment of relief I just try to do anything to enjoy. Not sure if this is what you feel or mean, but people here are helpful. Know you are not alone!

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@marjou

@annieb0188 First welcome! I describe my unending depression and anxiety as so overwhelming that I just want to stay in a corner, unnoticed and away from people, but debilitating to the point where I can't think. When I get a moment of relief I just try to do anything to enjoy. Not sure if this is what you feel or mean, but people here are helpful. Know you are not alone!

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Sometimes when I am depressed, I feel like I'm moving through molasses. One thing that helps me to choose a task and concentrate on that. When I complete that task, I choose another – anything.am slow, but it helps a lot, plus talking to someone – especially a therapist or a helpline. This forum helps too.

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When I seem to have too many chores at one time, I choose the 20-minute rule and do dishes or laundry for twenty minutes and then quit because I feel like I have accomplished something. I tell myself I can rest now. I seem to be able to get through the day better even though I don't finish everything at the time.
Going back to more chores makes the job seem shorter and less burdensome. The doctor said to do this for pain as well. I let the pain develop too long before I take action. If I can reach the area, I do massage and tell myself it is better. Some days I have no problems at all and I practice a grateful attitude.
Sunshine during the day is the best free remedy. Dorisena

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@dorisena

When I seem to have too many chores at one time, I choose the 20-minute rule and do dishes or laundry for twenty minutes and then quit because I feel like I have accomplished something. I tell myself I can rest now. I seem to be able to get through the day better even though I don't finish everything at the time.
Going back to more chores makes the job seem shorter and less burdensome. The doctor said to do this for pain as well. I let the pain develop too long before I take action. If I can reach the area, I do massage and tell myself it is better. Some days I have no problems at all and I practice a grateful attitude.
Sunshine during the day is the best free remedy. Dorisena

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Good ideas. Sunshine really is the best medicine.

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@junkartist Lately the depression is so overwhelming that it feels like walking thru quick sand and sinking at same time. I thank God for this forum!

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I totally agree @dorisena
Slow and steady wins the race!👍

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It is important to distinguish between stress that is related to medical conditions such as being in a wheelchair or being physically ill and conditions that are related to selfishness, ignorance, meanness, and such to the point of abuse of a spouse. One can be tolerated with medication and the other requires positive action to protect the health of the abused. I chose to stay in a broken marriage for fifty years and survived the problem and have been successfully healing for fifteen years. But the journey is very long to find peace late in life. It was a choice for me and I used little medication to cope. I think when my spouse was ill and we knew he would not live long, I chose to stay "on the job" because I couldn't abandon another human being with no care and he couldn't care very well for himself. It is a choice in life.
My consequences have been good in the end. It is the pandemic that makes me so lonely. Dorisena

REPLY
@dorisena

It is important to distinguish between stress that is related to medical conditions such as being in a wheelchair or being physically ill and conditions that are related to selfishness, ignorance, meanness, and such to the point of abuse of a spouse. One can be tolerated with medication and the other requires positive action to protect the health of the abused. I chose to stay in a broken marriage for fifty years and survived the problem and have been successfully healing for fifteen years. But the journey is very long to find peace late in life. It was a choice for me and I used little medication to cope. I think when my spouse was ill and we knew he would not live long, I chose to stay "on the job" because I couldn't abandon another human being with no care and he couldn't care very well for himself. It is a choice in life.
My consequences have been good in the end. It is the pandemic that makes me so lonely. Dorisena

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@dorisena Do you find your area starting to open up a bit, easing some of the Covid restrictions? While I am vaccinated, I continue to mask up and maintain social distancing. Each of our counties are assigned risk evaluations. Having some health issues to protect, I still need to get out. What do you have on your list to participate in when you decide to mingle a bit? What do you miss the most?
Ginger

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@gingerw

@dorisena Do you find your area starting to open up a bit, easing some of the Covid restrictions? While I am vaccinated, I continue to mask up and maintain social distancing. Each of our counties are assigned risk evaluations. Having some health issues to protect, I still need to get out. What do you have on your list to participate in when you decide to mingle a bit? What do you miss the most?
Ginger

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No, I do not go places because wearing a mask makes breathing difficult. I have had a light case of the virus at Christmas my family brought to me and had a moniclonal antibody IV infusion at that time so I don't consider myself a risk factor in any way. My diabetes blood sugar is 95-98 in the morning. I don't plan to have a vaccine in the near future because the infusion is supposed to be doing its job. I prefer to stay home on the farm except for going to church to practice the piano and organ so I can play in the near future. We are having regular services with safety procedures. I am not comfortable with the news about the issues and the advice, so I just stay home. I miss having people care enough to call or email me and I miss my old friends whom I have outlived. Once in a while my grandaughter picks up dinner for us and we eat here at home. I miss some of my volunteering from the past but had given up much of it before the pandemic. I never had time for social mingling anyway. I am a country girl. Dorisena

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