Family Relations: How do I accept and adjust to family moving away?

@normawatkins So happy for you. At 67 yrs and no children has given me thoughts of my future but you and others give me hope.

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Marjou's post - I'm 79 and with no children or contact with relatives less than 3,000 miles away, I wish I had spent more time expanding my friendship network.
With most of my friends now deceased or in assisted living facilities, I depend on the occasional kindness of neighbor or my small underfunded Senior Center nurse.
I believe we need better funded protections and support for seniors either abandoned by family or once independent but with age related losses.
I believe Norma Watkins will find a way to get the help she needs.

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Marjou's post - I'm 79 and with no children or contact with relatives less than 3,000 miles away, I wish I had spent more time expanding my friendship network.
With most of my friends now deceased or in assisted living facilities, I depend on the occasional kindness of neighbor or my small underfunded Senior Center nurse.
I believe we need better funded protections and support for seniors either abandoned by family or once independent but with age related losses.
I believe Norma Watkins will find a way to get the help she needs.

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In an ideal world, we would have more outside support. My health has recently been compromised and I can’t support rebuilding as it was. I have had home healthcare after hospital stays. The agency I worked with required a 6 hr per week commitment. I don’t need that but was thinking it would be nice to have someone for a few hrs on the weekend for company and maybe fixing some meals for the upcoming week. I may need to consider retirement community.

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Thanks for sharing a reflective comment.
I understand that you are childless, have loss friends and have no family near you but it doesn't mean you can't get out the house and do meaningful things.

Sometimes what we perceive as abandonment by family or age related loss of independence, lack of safety, and support is based on personal circumstances and lifestyle choices.

My favorite words to friends and family members who feel life has stopped moving is, “Life is what you make it. You may stop moving but time doesn’t.”

My husband retired and we left the Midwest and relocated back down south where family is 10-45 minutes away. We were very excited only to become disappointed that no one visit and only call occasionally.

Instead of waiting on family get togethers my beautiful husband and I accepted and respect the freedom of others choice to fellowship or not to fellowship and create our own personal moments.

We learned a long time ago happiness is a state of mind and never depends others to create it. We also learned never to live life based on others approval or presence as people come and go. People should life their lives on their terms.

We are always happy to share time together with others when the opportunity present itself. I have single friends and family members who have adopted our outlook on life and applied it to their lives and are much happier.

Life can be very difficult and create moments of sadness but we can all have a relationship with life by living and staying positive and choosing to be happy and grateful for anyone who share their hearts when possible.

As a result of Covid, many of us are staying home these days. However, it doesn't mean we can't still do meaningful volunteer work.

AARP is a great resource for seniors. You might like their Virtual Volunteer Program since you have concerns for safety. If you like getting out call your local Community Center and ask what activities they have for seniors. Bingo is still fun or volunteer to teach knitting 🧶 if you have that skill.

Hospitals have volunteer services for seniors. Maybe you can read to a sick child or go around and pray for those who want it.

All I am saying is that life is short then we die. So purpose to live your life choosing happiness and seek to share your wisdom and talents with someone who desires it.

Happy living, laughing and celebrating every day of your life.

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You and your beautiful husband may serve as an inspiration to others to not be affected by other's presence or approval, but to recognize that happiness is a matter of personal choice.
However, as you suggest circumstances vary. And as a social human being, I do allow that others do influence me. That's why I joined this group.
Although people's cognitive, mental, physical and financial health varies, I believe we are all doing the best we can with what we have.
My best to you.

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Considering a retirement community is something I hope to get to when I "catch up", if that ever happens.
Vote to make this a more "ideal" world - with reduced function it is important to use what tools remain to us.
Does your compromised health prevent you from being a volunteer social phone caller to shut ins?
Might a local church or community agency have
volunteers to provide you with company and a home cooked meal?
Hang in there!

Jump to this post

Thanks for sharing a reflective comment.
I understand that you are childless, have loss friends and have no family near you but it doesn't mean you can't get out the house and do meaningful things.

Sometimes what we perceive as abandonment by family or age related loss of independence, lack of safety, and support is based on personal circumstances and lifestyle choices.

My favorite words to friends and family members who feel life has stopped moving is, “Life is what you make it. You may stop moving but time doesn’t.”

My husband retired and we left the Midwest and relocated back down south where family is 10-45 minutes away. We were very excited only to become disappointed that no one visit and only call occasionally.

Instead of waiting on family get togethers my beautiful husband and I accepted and respect the freedom of others choice to fellowship or not to fellowship and create our own personal moments.

We learned a long time ago happiness is a state of mind and never depends others to create it. We also learned never to live life based on others approval or presence as people come and go. People should life their lives on their terms.

We are always happy to share time together with others when the opportunity present itself. I have single friends and family members who have adopted our outlook on life and applied it to their lives and are much happier.

Life can be very difficult and create moments of sadness but we can all have a relationship with life by living and staying positive and choosing to be happy and grateful for anyone who share their hearts when possible.

As a result of Covid, many of us are staying home these days. However, it doesn't mean we can't still do meaningful volunteer work.

AARP is a great resource for seniors. You might like their Virtual Volunteer Program since you have concerns for safety. If you like getting out call your local Community Center and ask what activities they have for seniors. Bingo is still fun or volunteer to teach knitting 🧶 if you have that skill.

Hospitals have volunteer services for seniors. Maybe you can read to a sick child or go around and pray for those who want it.

All I am saying is that life is short then we die. So purpose to live your life choosing happiness and seek to share your wisdom and talents with someone who desires it.

Happy living, laughing and celebrating every day of your life.

Jump to this post