1. < Cancer: Managing Symptoms

Facing Cancer Recurrence, PTSD & Acknowledging Mental Health

Posted by Merry, Alumni Mentor @merpreb, Dec 6, 2018

It's extremely difficult to face the fact of recurring cancers. After treatments we try and get away from it all and live our life. Then along comes another CT scan or PET scan and POW, you have to face another cancer. My reaction was developing PTSD.

You can read what I wrote in my blog: https://my20yearscancer.com/blog/
How do we cope? How do we react? What do we do?
How have you all reacted to another cancer? Or the possibility of another one? Has your "already compromised" mental health been able to deal with it? How? Or not?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Cancer: Managing Symptoms Support Group.

Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @richcolleen "Just had my scan at the Mayo Clinic was also nervous (my cancer is terminal) as..." + (show)
@richcolleen

Just had my scan at the Mayo Clinic was also nervous (my cancer is terminal) as I had different feelings within lung and stomach. Of course one always thinks the worst. Turned out everything was same.my scan was read and meet with Dr same day which helped me. Tumor stayed the same as did the nodules.get sick 8-10 days after treatments, which I get every 21 days, so I took holiday and skipping the next 21 days. Hoping I made good decision but my mind was tired of being sick. Prayers coming your way.

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@richcolleen- I think that we have to decide for ourselves how much we can take before we step back and say, "hey now, that's enough for now". The night of my last chemo session my husband almost called an ambulance. If I had more scheduled I don't think that I would have been able to do it. Heal well, rest a lot and hopefully you will bounce back soon. What will you do other while you heal?

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Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @alamogal635 "@merpreb What a fantastic attitude you have. Gosh, you are a true trooper and have been..." + (show)
@alamogal635

@merpreb What a fantastic attitude you have. Gosh, you are a true trooper and have been through so much and are going through so much. Will have to think up a mantra, but that's a great idea. What is SBRT? That is another new term for me. Gosh, I am not great at prayer--sometimes nothing comes, but I figure the intention is acknowledged. I am better today--the closer it gets. As you say it is getting to be where the results will be known and shared.. Was going to say that cancer is a sneaky and nasty disease to have, but so are so many others. Yes, it does make us turn inward. The thought of something growing within that has no place there actually makes me angry. This is a great place to come and "vent" with others who are sharing in something that others cannot relate to fully. Anyway, thank you for your kind words and for being here as moderators. Your knowledge is wonderful as is your support. I hold you in awe for lending such support with all you have going on in your life and with your health.

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Good morning @alamogal635 - Thank you for your kind words. As a Mentor it's been truly an honor to share my experience and knowledge so that I can hopefully make it easier for others. And you have not been a wall flower on here either! You have extended your self in a truly heroic measure so soon after your operation! I think that reaching out to people who truly understand your feelings is so important and healing! Thank you for all your help too! What will you be doing today? Are you in the path of the hurricane?

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Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @becsbuddy "@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age,..." + (show)
@becsbuddy

@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age, etc. I, too, didn’t tell my mother when I was diagnosed with a brain lesion due to a rare autoimmune disease. But, it turned out that she knew from the beginning. It was so hard to pretend that all was well when it wasn’t. Now, she is a good support to me. She’s 96 and healthier than I am!
I hope all goes well and you can make your trip to the east coast. Please take care

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@becsbuddy- I agree with you about telling @janlanderz's mom. Having cancer is stress enough but not telling your mom about your illness ads to that. I'm sure that you have felt that. Also I'm sure that your mom knows that something is up because you have cancelled your trips to see her. It sounds like she has brought you up to be a caring loving person, so giver her the benefit of the doubt that she will help you and that it will not hurt her. Will you give this some thought?

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Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @jshdma "@alamogal635 @merpreb Just reading these stories is terrifying. No wonder you are afraid. And yes, the..." + (show)
@jshdma

@alamogal635 @merpreb Just reading these stories is terrifying. No wonder you are afraid. And yes, the unknown makes everything worse. I wish AA stood for "anxiety anonymous," but unfortunately it's not that simple.

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@jshdma- Now there's a thought! Maybe we could come up with a better acronym and start a whole new "thing". What are your thoughts? Any ideas?

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1 reply
kittykiernan | @kittykiernan | Sep 2, 2019

Hi everyone I have chronic Epstein barre , it causing cancer. I can not move my neck and had white things in my mouth for a month, no one helps me. God forbid I can find a oncologists or beg someone to do a peta scan. I have had who
It’s patches down my esophagus for a moth

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1 reply
janlanderz | @janlanderz | Sep 1, 2019
In reply to @gingerw "I am so impressed to read what everyone is saying! @janlanderz Your strength is awesome, and..." + (show)
@gingerw

I am so impressed to read what everyone is saying!
@janlanderz Your strength is awesome, and your wisdom to downplay your issues with your mom is commendable. Remember, you are her daughter, and she may be aware something is not right. Perhaps saying there are some health issues, but not many details, will be enough?
@auntieoakley I like the sounds of your group!
@alamogal35 You have my prayers
@merpreb It's scary times, but no doubt you will handle things with grace and attitude ;))
Having a group like Connect here to lean on is a good thing!
Ginger

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thanks everyone for your input.. I am so glad to be part of this group.. the support is overwhelming... and sacred...

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janlanderz | @janlanderz | Sep 1, 2019
In reply to @becsbuddy "@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age,..." + (show)
@becsbuddy

@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age, etc. I, too, didn’t tell my mother when I was diagnosed with a brain lesion due to a rare autoimmune disease. But, it turned out that she knew from the beginning. It was so hard to pretend that all was well when it wasn’t. Now, she is a good support to me. She’s 96 and healthier than I am!
I hope all goes well and you can make your trip to the east coast. Please take care

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thank you becky... you are too cute... glad your mom is doing so well... and I do think she knows there is something wrong.. I told her I quit smoking in Dec.. she is real glad to hear that... but I think she knows something is wrong.. but I still rather not tell her the worst.. did tell her a while back they were checking a lump on my throat..

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Mentor
Ginger, Volunteer Mentor | @gingerw | Sep 1, 2019

I am so impressed to read what everyone is saying!
@janlanderz Your strength is awesome, and your wisdom to downplay your issues with your mom is commendable. Remember, you are her daughter, and she may be aware something is not right. Perhaps saying there are some health issues, but not many details, will be enough?
@auntieoakley I like the sounds of your group!
@alamogal35 You have my prayers
@merpreb It's scary times, but no doubt you will handle things with grace and attitude ;))
Having a group like Connect here to lean on is a good thing!
Ginger

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Mentor
Becky, Volunteer Mentor | @becsbuddy | Sep 1, 2019
In reply to @janlanderz "I have just started seeing a therapist at our Hospice Centre... the therapists at the cancer..." + (show)
@janlanderz

I have just started seeing a therapist at our Hospice Centre... the therapists at the cancer clinic were not all that helpful unfortunately. I do not think I can get my daughter to go ... she has a young son.. my only grandson 🙂 who is 8 yrs old and can be quite a handful.. she is very busy with all his activities... however, she is doing much better since I have been hiding my emotions from her... I learned alot from that message I had posted... it really helps to show strength and not weakness...
My immediate family... 4 sisters and my mom live about 1200 miles from me in the East Coast of Canada... my sisters know I have cancer, but I chose not to tell my mom, with suggestions from my sisters... I agreed not to tell her because it will weaken her and she is getting old.. it will not fix my cancer, so I agree she does not have to know...
what is really sad however is that I go to the east coast every year and did not go this year. I told my mom that we were really busy at work and that work asked me to cancel my vacation.. even though the doctor put me off of work since my Diagnosis in Dec 2018... I hate not being truthful to my mom, but I know God will forgive me because it is for a good reason. I did not go to visit this year because of the PVT blood clot I got in May... afraid the long drive will cause me to get another clot... the doctor did put me on eliquis for life...sigh...

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@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age, etc. I, too, didn’t tell my mother when I was diagnosed with a brain lesion due to a rare autoimmune disease. But, it turned out that she knew from the beginning. It was so hard to pretend that all was well when it wasn’t. Now, she is a good support to me. She’s 96 and healthier than I am!
I hope all goes well and you can make your trip to the east coast. Please take care

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2 replies
alamogal635 | @alamogal635 | Sep 1, 2019
In reply to @auntieoakley "You are in my prayers as well! I will be thinking of you, while you wait..." + (show)
@auntieoakley

You are in my prayers as well! I will be thinking of you, while you wait for results.

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Thank you. It means the world to have your support. Will let you all know when I know.

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